Married for 2 months wanted a divorce to remarry

[mohdirfan08787 16]

Well, since this has been a long thread about illegal immigration, and "If immigration start removing illegal immigrants, they have to call entire US army which they don't have the time" < that was posted, I thought it was talking about illegals in the Army, which now it makes sense to me how they were referring to call the Army to help remove illegal immigrants, see what I'm saying?

Just what went through my head when I read the statement.

I am sorry i meant, They will need alot of help from US army, National Guard, Navy, special forces and Local police including border guards:) to deport the entire Illegal alians from the country.

There are approx 12 millions people living in the country without papers.

[raven52 233]

Dude, I give you props for telling such a story, and you have ""huge kunahas" for telling it.

I think you have nothing but trouble down the road, and in some ways I feel you tried to do what was right, but made some very poor decisions.

I believe I would get a good lawyer, and tell all, I mean everything, and let the chips fall where they may.

I do think you have a long, hard road ahead of you, due to your decisions!

[TBoneTX 43,048]

Actions have consequences.

There is little that anyone here can tell you except to find an excellent lawyer with whom to discuss your options.

[Jawaree 717]

I guess no one here can help suggest without sarcasm. I did try my best to explain things with honesty but i guess so far took it as if this post was a joke. First off, if i'm not in this situation where my wife is threatening to report me and with a possible deportation, i wouldn't even marry either. I rather continue what i started with my lady here and see how it goes from there. We are doing good so far and her company, thoughtfulness and mutual feelings are something i cannot just throw away because of my immigration status. I do hope one day, you can feel the fear i'm feeling everytime i go out my house. I did not come here to gain pity, i came here to get answers and motivation. Thank you anyway.

thought I gave you sound man to man advise...what do you mean? I am

never judgmental of anyones demise, but giving a honest answer if a

is question is asked is whats the forum is for & if it relates to immigrating

you will get what other posters thinks, You made decisions without thinking

and no one here will subscribe to doing anything that's fraud...now since

you are here & wants to adjust, you need a divorce, get marry if in love,

and then have her petition you using an atty....if not , you may be in for

a rude awakening than the answers you get here

Yes it should be locked...its way off topic about illegals in the army now

Edited March 28, 2015 by Jawaree

[belinda63 2,981]

You know what I would do with you if I were the interviewing officer? I would deny you and tell you to go home. If you really love your wife (whichever one that is at the time of the interview) you wouldn't mind being separated for a year or so while you wait to do this the legal and correct way. But you don't want to leave the US, that is obvious from every post you have written. It is all about what can you do so you can remain here. That is coming across loud and clear now and will come across loud and clear when you interview. You are not so worried about being with your wife or lady friend as you are about not having to leave the US.

[billy0227 0]

You know what I would do with you if I were the interviewing officer? I would deny you and tell you to go home. If you really love your wife (whichever one that is at the time of the interview) you wouldn't mind being separated for a year or so while you wait to do this the legal and correct way. But you don't want to leave the US, that is obvious from every post you have written. It is all about what can you do so you can remain here. That is coming across loud and clear now and will come across loud and clear when you interview. You are not so worried about being with your wife or lady friend as you are about not having to leave the US.

I'm pretty sure no one really tries to understand the main point of the story here. True, that the story may sound as if i really do after the marriage. Heck, we are talking about me being threatened to be reported for possible deportation, of course looking on USCIS or ICE's point of view, i am desperate to gain legality to remain here regardless of what i say are completely the truth or not. And of course, it is so normal for any human being to protect what you have worked for as long as you can, if not face it and move on. And currently, i'm just that normal person who's just concern of losing everything i worked for.

Of course, it's common sense in any point of view that, regardless of what USCIS thinks, i do want to stay here for many possible reasons probably known only to me. All my family are here, i'm already used on my life here, this is where i got my first job, my first car, my first college, my first apartment, my first furnitures, my first bank accounts etc etc. and i honestly believe that only a normal person would think of doing any possible way to have that life protected.

Now i know, either USCIS or you guys here will probably care any of that, and i totally understand that because i am very much aware that the only thing that matters here is whatever USCIS decides and whatever it is, i do not have any choice but to accept it anyway.

But then again, that's not my point of why i came here. Again, i came here to hopefully seek suggestions or other options to help me continue my life here. I don't want to get dramatic and ###### around here to get any pity. I just don't understand the means of simply judging someone of fraud when it was not even intended at all. What difference it makes me desperate to get legality now when i could have done it long time ago with my old girlfriend for more than 2 years who was also a USC? What difference it makes me desperate of wanting a divorce when my own wife is even considering me to petition?

Why?

I don't understand that because of life decisions and situations i did making me illegal was enough to describe me as fraud.

Do I not have any other options? Am i not allowed to try and fight for what's mine? Am i not allowed to voice out?

See...that is why i came here thinking someone can put themselves on my shoes.

Yeah i made mistakes, and i'm willing to face the consequences.

But at least give me a weapon to use as well when you people already had one at hand.

###### happen, i know. But it seems that don't even apply here too.

I'm not even hiding my presence from the government here, in fact, i was caught last December driving using my expired license, went to DMV and they gave me 3 months permit to drive, went to court and pay my fees. File my taxes, starting a small business here under my name, registers legally and gotten a permit. Now this life, this life i'm used to doing now, this is me now. And just because someone came to my life and threatens me to have these all taken away because she won't admit both our differences and accept divorce without doing any harm? That she can use my immigration status to keep me controlled? And all suggestions i read so far points only to the same thing? Me being illegal?

Seriously though, i appreciate your concerns of what USCIS can possibly decides regarding my status now?

But this guy was indicating as if that is the only reason i wanted is to be legal through that marriage.

Is it really because there are no possible way for USCIS, or you people for that matter, to think differently than to point i'm illegal thus have no rights to redeem myself?

Can it be not proven that if i have to marry someone, that would be someone i really love without being accused first of fraud simply because i planned to divorce my wife because were not compatible?

And i know some or probably most of you will find this story very hard to believe or not even close to a fact. But it is.

See, all this time i keep thinking marital judge differs from immigration judge, and the obvious reason i came here to tell the story is because i really want your opinion about it. Simply a question of, if i proceed with my divorce, what's my wife's rights of grounds to report about my status when in the first place we did not even filed for petition yet? have no properties to divide? barely even know or see each other? never did i or her was given access for any of our bank accounts? no kids? no joints? and yada yada... Can just both of us move on and accept our sudden mistake? Seriously by far, what possible lost will that gives us if we do? That's all i want.

But then, she won't accept truce, and wants to bring immigration on this instead. And that again, is my main point of coming here. Can just one person go to USCIS to randomly say, this person is illegal, go deport him? Is that enough reason?

If so, who are those guys standing daily in front of Home Depot who most came uninspected?

Is it enough for me to just go straight to USCIS and say "hey, there's dozen's of illegals in there committing fraud labors?" That's all it takes? Reasonable?

What crime have i done really in this story?

Can i mention i just renewed my driver's license this January that had expired in 2012 using my new address and they had it renewed with ease when i originally applied for AB60?

Sorry but I just really don't get why is it me being illegal is the only point of view taken here.

Edited March 28, 2015 by s2pidkaspr

[hnubno 9]

i couldn't read all the responses by everyone because half of them were just too judgemental altho there were some good advices thrown in there in between the judgements. we all agree that OP did wrong by talking to both woman and by marrying the one he doesn't love even if it was by "force"...but dang some people just keep talking about this and not answering his questions. altho yes OP doesn't seem to really try see thru the judgement for the advices and there are some good advices there.

OP you need to either try to annul the marriage or get a consultation with the best divorce lawyer in your town...even if you don't use that lawyer at least she can't either because that lawyer won't be able to represent her after meeting with you. plus you'll be able to get ideas on getting this divorce done with. i also agree with other comments that you should try to get away from her and not let her know your whereabouts by finding new job, new apartment, etc. i personally feel you need some support from your family, put away your pride and go to your dad for some help especially financially or just to disappear from her. Get this divorce done with then you can move on to trying to get a green card.

altho i do have to say that it'll be hard when you apply for a green card because they will probably look at your first marriage as fraud (on your part) even if it's forced on you. what you don't understand when all the other comments were saying that even if this marriage was forced, your future petition for green card, the USCIS officer/adjudicator, will not look at it as you being forced but that you did this marriage to get a green card and that it fell apart before you were able to start the process. it's just their way of thinking when they see things like this. so yes you were forced but a USCIS adjudicator may not believe that and say you tried this marriage for fraud. that means you have to be very careful and thorough if in the future you petition for green card with your true love spouse.

also yes find out about if you divorce here that you still need to do anything else in your country too...especially cuz you are fromt he phillipines.

good luck

[hnubno 9]

also get a good immigration lawyer when you are ready for petitioning for a green card because divorcing and how it happened and ended.

[billy0227 0]

i couldn't read all the responses by everyone because half of them were just too judgemental altho there were some good advices thrown in there in between the judgements. we all agree that OP did wrong by talking to both woman and by marrying the one he doesn't love even if it was by "force"...but dang some people just keep talking about this and not answering his questions. altho yes OP doesn't seem to really try see thru the judgement for the advices and there are some good advices there.

OP you need to either try to annul the marriage or get a consultation with the best divorce lawyer in your town...even if you don't use that lawyer at least she can't either because that lawyer won't be able to represent her after meeting with you. plus you'll be able to get ideas on getting this divorce done with. i also agree with other comments that you should try to get away from her and not let her know your whereabouts by finding new job, new apartment, etc. i personally feel you need some support from your family, put away your pride and go to your dad for some help especially financially or just to disappear from her. Get this divorce done with then you can move on to trying to get a green card.

altho i do have to say that it'll be hard when you apply for a green card because they will probably look at your first marriage as fraud (on your part) even if it's forced on you. what you don't understand when all the other comments were saying that even if this marriage was forced, your future petition for green card, the USCIS officer/adjudicator, will not look at it as you being forced but that you did this marriage to get a green card and that it fell apart before you were able to start the process. it's just their way of thinking when they see things like this. so yes you were forced but a USCIS adjudicator may not believe that and say you tried this marriage for fraud. that means you have to be very careful and thorough if in the future you petition for green card with your true love spouse.

also yes find out about if you divorce here that you still need to do anything else in your country too...especially cuz you are fromt he phillipines.

good luck

Well, i did actually consult with my dad's lawyer a week ago, same lawyer that process all our paperworks for all of us to migrate here. I told him the whole story and he himself even adviced me to divorce her and even asked if divorcing her would affect my status, and my lawyer said that immigration and marital are two different jurisdictions and would never affect my status, however, if my divorce was finalized, i would return back being out of status until i remarry someone. though we did not end up with questions if the second marriage is proven "real" will it still get denied if i file for aos due to my first marriage? but im planning to set an appointment with him again soon regarding this. then again, i only ask for peace anyway, what i really just keep asking her is to agree with the divorce and move on even offered her for us to be friends still..i'd rather get to know more about my lady here and marry her in the future even if we both agree we can do so now, the only thing that makes me actually to do it is because of wife being threatful

[divalocs 8]

I understand people feel he was being fraudulent but I wonder if everyone read the full story. He was honest with his wife and told her he didn't want the relationship prior to marrying her. She called his job and because she wanted him demanded that he marry her. The wife is a bully. Why would you threaten and force someone to marry you. He married her out of fear. The wife demanded the marriage based low self esteem and selfishness

[Thomas&Cleofe 358]

Another option to obtain a visa other than through marriage is H1B, "available for offers of employment that are in a specialty occupation". Do you have special skills, training, knowledge that would benefit the US of A? You write that you chose to abandon the education you were allegedly pursuing here and preferred to fall out of status.

There is not much sarcasm in this thread, but certainly answers you don't want to hear. You made choices in your past and are now facing the consequences. This is called accountability, and understanding it is part of growing up. And noone on this forum can undo the choices you made in the past. Only you can learn from it, move on, and do better in the future.

Based on what you write, I think you are out of legal options, but should talk to an immigration lawyer to make sure. You can try to leave the US quietly without drawing too much attention or continue living in fear of getting busted and incur a multi-year ban. Once more you are faced with a choice.

There is no way he can leave quietly....even if he could, he will still have a ban for overstay.

I'm betting he does not even have a valid passport anymore....as Philippine passports are only issued for a validity of 5 years.

[Shauneg 762]

Well, i did actually consult with my dad's lawyer a week ago, same lawyer that process all our paperworks for all of us to migrate here. I told him the whole story and he himself even adviced me to divorce her and even asked if divorcing her would affect my status, and my lawyer said that immigration and marital are two different jurisdictions and would never affect my status, however, if my divorce was finalized, i would return back being out of status until i remarry someone. though we did not end up with questions if the second marriage is proven "real" will it still get denied if i file for aos due to my first marriage? but im planning to set an appointment with him again soon regarding this. then again, i only ask for peace anyway, what i really just keep asking her is to agree with the divorce and move on even offered her for us to be friends still..i'd rather get to know more about my lady here and marry her in the future even if we both agree we can do so now, the only thing that makes me actually to do it is because of wife being threatful

Would never affect my status

This is wrong for the many number of reasons people have listed.

if my divorce was finalized, i would return back being out of status until i remarry someone.

you are out of status now, will be when you're divorced....will be if/when you get married.

Most people who have been replying seem to understand your story completely and you're just going to have to understand there's very little you can do. Everyone is telling you what to do but you don't want to listen because it involves you going home. That's really the reality of the situation and where this road is headed....you are going to have to accept that reality.

Get divorced, hire and immigration lawyer and let the chips fall where they.

[belinda63 2,981]

You have had no status since you stopped attending school. Just being married to a USC does not give you any status. Either the attorney is incorrect or you misunderstood. You will only have status when the green card is successfully applied for.

What you will have to do is marry a USC and prove that the marriage is real and true for the purpose of love and not for you to obtain a green card. This is going to be extremely difficult for you to do given your history. You will have no success filing with your current wife since you have no real marriage. If you divorce her you and marry your current lady friend be certain your relationships will be questioned during the interview.

As to your current wife's threats to have you deported, she can report you and your employer. Whether anything will come of it no one here can predict. Roll the dice and take your chances. But understand you are out of status and subject to detention and deportation at any time.

[discoverusa 229]

It amazes me why people are so judgmental. I agree some decisions are not that great, but why crucify the guy. We all make mistakes. I suggest you go to see an attorney as they see things more clearly, factually and without judgment. I hope it all works out for you.

[JohnR! 5,495]

Get a divorce. Marry whomever you wish. If you aren't allowed to stay in the US you can always move back home and live happily ever after.

So here's an uncommon story.

I met my wife on my sister's wedding last year when she was invited to be part of it. We kind of fell in love in a weird yet quick way but she is living in the other state. Due to our separated lives, weeks later after we first met she officially said we are in relationship and i was excited about it. We never missed a day without talking and as any couples in a relationship, we do talk romantic stuffs this and that over the phone. She then asked if i could visit her to her state but i said i can't. Being aware that we are in a relationship together, i honestly said that it is due to my current f1 out of status state that i fear going into government buildings such as airports to avoid getting questioned. I was amazed that she fully understands my situation and told me she knows how it feels since she had a friend like me too. So what happened after knowing im not capable of visiting her, she offered that she will just visit me instead.

I live alone, renting my apartment and have been working illegally for years now. I came here on 2007 with an F1 Visa under D/S (duration of status) on my I-94 and studied full time for 4 years under two career changes within those years but with good school score and credits, prior being admitted to college to take my career i also have went finishing up a GED class and completed a California English School for International Student. Kind of a requirement before i can take units classes for college. But things gotten between me and my dad, who is sponsoring my studies, because of expensive tuition fees for international students that he puts a lot of pressure over my studies and i felt caged up under his roof so i ended up running away with pride and belief that i could carry my own life. (yeah i know i was not thinking straight at the time) So as of today I am now out of status for 4 years since i did not register for classes on Fall of 2011. My last complete attended class was on Spring of 2011.

Anyway, i said that for you to know how i ended up with my current status. So to continue, me and my wife was still talking almost everyday but since both of us were living in different state, i get emotional being alone that i go out with my friends when i get a chance. One day i met someone that i end up hanging out with almost everyday as well, we went out different places together and whatnot, she was very thoughtful. Take note that we did not had any relationship at all. As days goes by, 3 months later my wife came to visit me and as i develop a feeling towards the lady i met here, i end up not giving effort when my wife visited me here. Its true that it is my fault for not being faithful and had my feelings fell for the lady i met here instead of my wife.

Still i went become to be honest with my wife and said that i cannot entertain her anymore as i dont want to break the other lady's feelings. And told her about the lady and how i developed a feeling to her. My wife had a family here as well that i end up giving her a ride there and go back to see my lady. Basically, my wife spends a week of vacation here with her related family instead of me.

Two days before she leave back to her state, i was notified by my work manager that a lady called with a phone number id from the state where my wife lives and told me that she was reporting me to them regarding my illegal status and that she wanted to talk to my work's owners. I felt threatened and went to her straight to talk about it. My wife then said that's only the first i can do since you cheated on me. She was indeed mad and i truly understand how she feels but told her that she doesn't have to jeopredice my immigration status. She then told me that i need to move with her and that we could marry to have my papers fixed for me to move with her. Having a fear to not agree with her i thought she may do more than what she did if she goes back to her state. So we went and got married the next day.

I went back to my lady and explained what happened and yada yada. Now, 2 months later, i kind of did my research of what possibly can happen if i divorce my wife and remarry with my lady since we both have not filed any paperworks regarding adjusting my status? Me and my wife obviously did not have much stuffs together, and have been only communicating through phone. While my lady here, during those months we have been going out together, we had made hundreds and hundreds of pictures and memories together and that she is willing to marry me if given a chance.

Now my concern is if divorcing my wife affects my immigration status? Or if i divorce her then she reports me for whatever reason, will i get deported? Or say that the divorce did went smoothly and i got remarried, will the decision for approving my adjustment of status be hinder because of possibly fraud marriage on my first wife?

Has anyone been into this experience? How did you handle? Or should i take some extra steps to secure myself before i continue with the divorce?

I already mentioned to my wife that i will divorce her but she refused to agree and i was told to not blame her of what will happen to me if i actually proceed with the divorce. Her last words to me was "if i can't have you, she can't too". So i kind of a bit scared going on with the divorce without any suggestions first.

I do understand that California is a "no-fault" state though and we got married here and i think the divorce may go smoothly in any way but i'm more concerned of any possibilities may occur with my immigration status since i have to wait for 6 months to have my divorce finalized and before i can remarry. I am open to any suggestions and will respond with an honest answer for you to guide me on what best steps i need to do in my situation right now.

Please help me. Thanks.