wife doesn't tell family about marriage

[ghana-usalove 0]

My wife in Ghana refuses to tell her family about our marriage. States it will make things "difficult and create problems" for her. Will this not be a guarantee denial at the embassy as we have no joint assets, have never lived together, and haven't spent much time together? I thought we would need several statements from family and friends to say that they are aware of our marriage, especially from her side. Can anyone tell me if i am correct with this assumption? I feel almost a guaranteed denial coming because nobody in Ghana knows about the marriage. Interview is coming up hopefully within a few months but she does not listen to me. Any advice?

[mrs thb 331]

google 'stokes interview'. i found out lots.

very difficult to pull the wool over their eyes. they're smart and know what to look for.

maybe you'd like to share this with her: but then again, maybe not!

btw, if she's not admitting to anything, the wool is over your eyes!!!

Edited March 13, 2015 by mrs thb

[Ebunoluwa 6,136]

The question should be asked : Why exactly does she not want her family to know and what problems does she think it will cause ?

The answer will be chased by the embassy and it better make a lot of sense.

I would not file unless I myself would have talked with her family and been treated with respect as her husband, please be aware that something

often is fishy if the beneficiary keeps a secret such as this, a marriage is a joyous family event not a skeleton in the closet that should be hidden.

This would be red flag to me. Did you ever meet her family or talk to them on the phone or skype ? If not be very, very careful before taking another

step further and do some investigating yourself before the embassy does in the future.

It will not look good at all for a successful visa approval in Ghana, which is a high fraud embassy.

It is difficult enough to get approved if all ducks are in a row, every t crossed and every i dotted, all this secret mess just spells trouble.

[CowBoE 429]

My wife in Ghana refuses to tell her family about our marriage. States it will make things "difficult and create problems" for her. Will this not be a guarantee denial at the embassy as we have no joint assets, have never lived together, and haven't spent much time together? I thought we would need several statements from family and friends to say that they are aware of our marriage, especially from her side. Can anyone tell me if i am correct with this assumption? I feel almost a guaranteed denial coming because nobody in Ghana knows about the marriage. Interview is coming up hopefully within a few months but she does not listen to me. Any advice?

Hmm... something is not adding up here ...

I assume you visited Ghana to marry her?

How well do you know her?

Did you not meet her family before, during, and after marriage?

Did you not have some sort of wedding ceremony with her family?

Can you talk to any of her family or friends directly?

While family and friends support of marriage is a good thing,

in certain situations, I think an adult can make their decision

without their support...but there should be clear explanation.

If I were you, I would be more concerned about finding out

what's in her head before worrying about the interview and visa.

In my head red light is blinking on this one.

[MrsBonsu 138]

You will need letters from her family members, something is wrong if she isn't or hasn't told anyone in her family, my husband sisters and godfathers, and friends wrote letters for us! I have been to ghana three times and family is very strong there so something is wrong, find out what it is

[ghana-usalove 0]

I have been to Ghana three times. Spoke to her mother and have met cousins, aunt, uncle, brother, sisters, grandmother. They know me and that we are together. Her reason for not disclosing is that she believes that people close to her may have bad intentions and can do spiritual things to prevent an approval at the embassy. When I went to marry, she did not disclose to any of them that I was there. We had a small ceremony with a few of her friends. The first two visits, family was always present.

[Ebunoluwa 6,136]

I have been to Ghana three times. Spoke to her mother and have met cousins, aunt, uncle, brother, sisters, grandmother. They know me and that we are together. Her reason for not disclosing is that she believes that people close to her may have bad intentions and can do spiritual things to prevent an approval at the embassy. When I went to marry, she did not disclose to any of them that I was there. We had a small ceremony with a few of her friends. The first two visits, family was always present.

I am familiar with the belief that many west African people hold concerning others close by will somehow 'steal their destiny' or 'spiritually block'

important things so they keep it to themselves, but we are talking about her immediate family here.

This is the embassy and they do not see it that way all though they claim to take all cultural things into consideration, they wont.

They know that a big cultural truth is that for the most part a wedding involves all family and friends and is a big celebration.

The only thing blocking your success will be both of you if you do not inform your family and friends of the marriage.

AP home investigations happen sometimes and if everyone in her family has no clue that she is married it is a 99% denial.

No one can predict that a home investigation will or will not happen so why take the risk.

You have met her mother and grandmother and siblings then why not at the very least tell them you are married.....surely they would not

want to block an approval and if she thinks they do then ask yourself why ? Not every Tom, ####### and Harry on the block needs to know but at the very

least her mother and siblings and grandmother and her good friends that she knows she can trust.

If she is a Christian then tell her that the enemy is not stronger than God and to start using her faith and speaking positive instead of

living in fear like this, it is not scriptural but voodoo based.

It took us 5 years to come together, 16 months in AP and after that a denial, then we filed again and our last stokes interview was approved and we hid nothing.

Don't play around with this or you will regret it. You can't drag your superstitions into a visa journey. Be transparent.

The photos you have to show of your marriage do not include her immediate family, what do you think the CO will ask her during your interview ?

Why are your parents and siblings not in attendance ? What will she say ? Because they may try to block my chance of approval ?

She is blocking it herself.

Edited March 13, 2015 by Ebunoluwa