Staying in the US after divorce, please help!

[Aleksandra 84 0]

Hi. I got married 2 months ago in the US. my husband is a US citizen. Everything was fine until just a couple of days ago when he started abusing me and suddenly abandoned me. I do not know where he is now. I started thinking he might have some mental issues. I am going to file for divorce in the next few days or so. I would like to ask if anyone of you knows if there is a chance for me to stay here, in the US, after divorce? I dont even have a green card yet. Obviosuly the marriage fell apart due to no fault of my own, so please, if you have any information or any ideas, dont hesitate to share... I really am confused. We have been together for 3 years but it was a long distance relationship, that is probably why i didnt even expect such extreme behavior.

Thank you for your help.

[desertblue88 0]

If you have not adjusted your status yet and it is still pending and you file divorce, you will not be eligible for permanent resident status and as such will be required to go back to your home country, unless you have documented proof such as police reports etc regarding the abuse, then you may be able to start a VAWA case.

[juliava 80]

If you still have a valid visa (tourist visa, student visa, work visa....)- yes, you may explore ways to adjust status here, but keep in your mind that you will not be eligible to adjust status based on marriage if you file for a divorce. You might also read about WAVA but as far as I know - you need serious documentation in that regards.

Edited August 1, 2010 by juliava

[payxibka 10,044]

not a removing conditions topic as the OP has not yet completed initial status adjustment

[sachinky 464]

You're not eligible for permanent residence status if you haven't even filed for AOS post-marriage to USC.

There is no basis for you to adjust your status and you have to return to your home-country if you get divorced.

Did you enter on the VWP?

Edited August 2, 2010 by sachinky

[JimVaPhuong 4,863]

Hi. I got married 2 months ago in the US. my husband is a US citizen. Everything was fine until just a couple of days ago when he started abusing me and suddenly abandoned me. I do not know where he is now. I started thinking he might have some mental issues. I am going to file for divorce in the next few days or so. I would like to ask if anyone of you knows if there is a chance for me to stay here, in the US, after divorce? I dont even have a green card yet. Obviosuly the marriage fell apart due to no fault of my own, so please, if you have any information or any ideas, dont hesitate to share... I really am confused. We have been together for 3 years but it was a long distance relationship, that is probably why i didnt even expect such extreme behavior.

Thank you for your help.

Wow! In only two days you've gone from "everything was fine" to:

1. Abused.

2. Abandoned.

3. Think he's got mental issues.

4. Filing for divorce in a couple of days.

5. How can I stay in the US?

I can see you've been extremely busy in the last couple of days!

First, what sort of visa did you enter the US with? Did you and your husband ever submit a green card application? What sort of evidence do you have to prove he abused you?

You can adjust status on your own based on abuse using VAWA, but you need some serious evidence that the abuse occurred. Also, be careful about divorce. A VAWA self-petitioner can be divorced, but you have to be able to demonstrate that the abuse was the cause of the divorce. If you live in a no-fault divorce state that doesn't allow divorce "for cause" then you might be better off postponing the divorce until after you've dealt with the green card issues.

There are some additional things I'm thinking here, but I won't say them out of courtesy, and also out of the possibility that my gut instincts may be wrong.

[payxibka 10,044]

Wow! In only two days you've gone from "everything was fine" to:

1. Abused.

2. Abandoned.

3. Think he's got mental issues.

4. Filing for divorce in a couple of days.

5. How can I stay in the US?

I can see you've been extremely busy in the last couple of days!

First, what sort of visa did you enter the US with? Did you and your husband ever submit a green card application? What sort of evidence do you have to prove he abused you?

You can adjust status on your own based on abuse using VAWA, but you need some serious evidence that the abuse occurred. Also, be careful about divorce. A VAWA self-petitioner can be divorced, but you have to be able to demonstrate that the abuse was the cause of the divorce. If you live in a no-fault divorce state that doesn't allow divorce "for cause" then you might be better off postponing the divorce until after you've dealt with the green card issues.

There are some additional things I'm thinking here, but I won't say them out of courtesy, and also out of the possibility that my gut instincts may be wrong.

OP's profile indicates joining TODAY... what other posts and why does it make you think something is up?? (not that I have not had similar thoughts

Edited August 2, 2010 by payxibka

[HannahP 119]

Wow! In only two days you've gone from "everything was fine" to:

1. Abused.

2. Abandoned.

3. Think he's got mental issues.

4. Filing for divorce in a couple of days.

5. How can I stay in the US?

Well, as someone WITH mental issues, I guarantee that things can change from one instant to another. And I'm sure that my hubby would agree.

[JimVaPhuong 4,863]

OP's profile indicates joining TODAY... what other posts and why does it make you think something is up?? (not that I have not had similar thoughts

I was going to respond, but I think it's better if I just keep my mouth shut for now.

[Joan >3 Bob 20]

Something SMELLS Rotten Here.........................

[Aleksandra 84 0]

thank you for all your replies.

I really feel sorry for those of you who think i might have made it up. i really do not wish that on anyone. my husband has never been an angel but i loved him and i didnt marry him just to stay in the us. i didnt even say i wanted to stay here. i just asked for your opinion on this matter. I feel lost and thought you guys wouldnt judge me. the fact is that my husband is nowhere to be found and i know that in the past he had some mental issues, like depression etc. I am meeting a lawyer tomorrow so we will see what my opitons are. i entered on b2 visa, didnt plan on getting married. it was a spontanious decision. this is not my first time in the us. i have travelled to the us 12 times before i got married. so obviosuly if i really cared about the green card only, i would have gotten married a long time ago. so do NOT judge. if you have nothing positive to say, do NOT say anything.

thank you.

[Goldfee111 3]

well guys keep it down...on a long distance relationship if u see each other just 2 weeks all 4-5 month u can play a good fake game

my husband abused me too and i would lay both of my hands in fire that he is not the type of guy...he was always the charmest nicest guy and he is so manipulativ that i did not even get it in the beginning....and if someone what asked me do u think he could ever hurt u i would say "my husband never ever" until i had a hand in my face and a table on my body..and after that i still couldnt believe it....so people with mental problems are able to fake really good for month even years...and then they get a blackout...read the book why does he do that to me...i had many hours with a psychologic person to even really understand what went wrong so fast...our relationship went from amazing to nitemare in one week...so dont judge...

alex the chances are not that great u need a lot proove...but i hope it works out for u with a lawyer

but honestly when u in the beginning not even wanna stay here...why u are not moving home?its hard here alone trust me..i know what iam talking abt...

good luck and god bless u

[Mme Rej 0]

thank you for all your replies.

I really feel sorry for those of you who think i might have made it up. i really do not wish that on anyone. my husband has never been an angel but i loved him and i didnt marry him just to stay in the us. i didnt even say i wanted to stay here. i just asked for your opinion on this matter. I feel lost and thought you guys wouldnt judge me. the fact is that my husband is nowhere to be found and i know that in the past he had some mental issues, like depression etc. I am meeting a lawyer tomorrow so we will see what my opitons are. i entered on b2 visa, didnt plan on getting married. it was a spontanious decision. this is not my first time in the us. i have travelled to the us 12 times before i got married. so obviosuly if i really cared about the green card only, i would have gotten married a long time ago. so do NOT judge. if you have nothing positive to say, do NOT say anything.

thank you.

Many people do make it up....Here goes WAVA again.....$170,000,000.00 of our tax dollars down the drain again...

I wonder if a real americain as in born american woman would try to use WAVA if she would get denied? I would think that ..umm..yes...because it seems like MOST of people who are using WAVA are people who comes in the country and not waisting time to make a claim with WAVA, WAVA is a warranty for a green card...Whats amusing, men who are coming to his country, will do self inflictions and make a claim with WAVA to be issued a green card....People wake-up...

as I said: $170,000,000.00....that is why I hate paying taxes....I have no benefice, well, except watching others using it....

[JimVaPhuong 4,863]

well guys keep it down...on a long distance relationship if u see each other just 2 weeks all 4-5 month u can play a good fake game

my husband abused me too and i would lay both of my hands in fire that he is not the type of guy...he was always the charmest nicest guy and he is so manipulativ that i did not even get it in the beginning....and if someone what asked me do u think he could ever hurt u i would say "my husband never ever" until i had a hand in my face and a table on my body..and after that i still couldnt believe it....so people with mental problems are able to fake really good for month even years...and then they get a blackout...read the book why does he do that to me...i had many hours with a psychologic person to even really understand what went wrong so fast...our relationship went from amazing to nitemare in one week...so dont judge...

I don't doubt anything you've said. In fact, I've seen the same thing happen in a couple of other relationships (not ones that I was involved in).

However, think about this... Everything was going fine, and then one day your husband cracked without warning and got violent. I'm sure there was an awful lot going through your mind over the next few days, and probably a lot of things you needed to work out. Two days after that first incident, would you have been on an internet forum asking how to get a green card?

[Goldfee111 3]

the thing is that....my first thought was also damn i gave everything up in germany i dont have anything there anymore..i builded up an existenz here with a job and friends and a house..what if i have to leave...

that are the things which ran through my mind...but when i got seperatet ive been here one and a half year so thats a long time...2 month is not..and there is the problem..iam still not approved for my removal and i was married almost 2 years...with not even a greencard yet i see there chance almost zero to stay here....

i know from cases where AOS was filed and it needed really long and people got deployed and died in war...these people got the greencard because they stayed that long in the states and uscis failed to process aos within 12 month...but in this case here..i dont thing so ...

i would go back home or try to work things out with the husband..go see a counselor and try to make ur marriage work...