NO CLUE WHATS GOING ON!

[jOHnLei 0]

Need Advice!

Here's the story!

Husband has a girl friend and hid her before i came here. I dont know her, i have no clue that he has a girl friend and close to each other. 2 days after my arrival in the US she introduced her to me, they are neighbors 2 blocks away from where we live (walking distance for me). They are very close, friends for 4 years and they can talk anything and everything under the sun. Husband said shes a friend that he can run to whenever he needed somebody to talk to, however, i wasnt told about her. Couple of weeks later, i read their text msgs and found out that shes calling him "babe" I was so jealous and asked hubby if theres something going on between them. He said nothing and they are only friends and that 2 years ago he asked the girl for a dinner and tried if it'll work beyond friendship but the girl refuses and 2 weeks before i came here the girl proposed to him that she'll leave her boyfriend if my husband would like to be with her. I freaked out when i heard about it and told him not to see her again coz as for me woman will ruin us. I am always in pain, feel so hurt, i always cry a river when it comes to her everytime he hides and that they're seeing each other behind my back. Hubby is always there with her if she needed a ride, doctors appointment and others. I never knew about that and when i learned about it and wanted to know everyday what she's up to and why she wanted my husband to give her a ride, some times i am told some time dont and still the same it'll always been left unsaid, they are still seeing each other without me knowing it. His alibis was if he tells me i freak out and if not i freak out.

Husband didnt tell her about me as we are talking in the internet, she only knew that her friend was engaged 4 months before i came here or i guess the day that my visa was approved. We live with his parents and if times his parents not around she visits, she has no car and lost her license so hubby pick her up to her house all the time, she used to visit the house 4 times a week before but now that im here hubby visits to her house, we always argued about her cant stand their friendship. He replied to her text msg when im not around and even call. I know he doesnt like arguements and so do i, he said there is nothing to be jealous about but why hes hiding it and erased their text messages. He runs to her 2am one time we argued. I dont know what to do about this anymore it drivin me crazy. I feel like i am all alone. i had nobody to talk to except his mom. he doesnt want to hurt bcoz he loves me but why he does things that will make my heartache. I know that its so unfair if i stop him from seeing her, he should understand that I gave up everything. He cant even keep his words. I love him so much more than myself. I am so weak when it comes to him and her. I wanted to go home, they said we need counseling. i dont know what to do..... He ignores my feeling.

Please i need ur advice hudband and wife's opinion.

He's 38 im 25...

[Loolie 56]

Need Advice!

Here's the story!

Husband has a girl friend and hid her before i came here. I dont know her, i have no clue that he has a girl friend and close to each other. 2 days after my arrival in the US she introduced her to me, they are neighbors 2 blocks away from where we live (walking distance for me). They are very close, friends for 4 years and they can talk anything and everything under the sun. Husband said shes a friend that he can run to whenever he needed somebody to talk to, however, i wasnt told about her. Couple of weeks later, i read their text msgs and found out that shes calling him "babe" I was so jealous and asked hubby if theres something going on between them. He said nothing and they are only friends and that 2 years ago he asked the girl for a dinner and tried if it'll work beyond friendship but the girl refuses and 2 weeks before i came here the girl proposed to him that she'll leave her boyfriend if my husband would like to be with her. I freaked out when i heard about it and told him not to see her again coz as for me woman will ruin us. I am always in pain, feel so hurt, i always cry a river when it comes to her everytime he hides and that they're seeing each other behind my back. Hubby is always there with her if she needed a ride, doctors appointment and others. I never knew about that and when i learned about it and wanted to know everyday what she's up to and why she wanted my husband to give her a ride, some times i am told some time dont and still the same it'll always been left unsaid, they are still seeing each other without me knowing it. His alibis was if he tells me i freak out and if not i freak out.

Husband didnt tell her about me as we are talking in the internet, she only knew that her friend was engaged 4 months before i came here or i guess the day that my visa was approved. We live with his parents and if times his parents not around she visits, she has no car and lost her license so hubby pick her up to her house all the time, she used to visit the house 4 times a week before but now that im here hubby visits to her house, we always argued about her cant stand their friendship. He replied to her text msg when im not around and even call. I know he doesnt like arguements and so do i, he said there is nothing to be jealous about but why hes hiding it and erased their text messages. He runs to her 2am one time we argued. I dont know what to do about this anymore it drivin me crazy. I feel like i am all alone. i had nobody to talk to except his mom. he doesnt want to hurt bcoz he loves me but why he does things that will make my heartache. I know that its so unfair if i stop him from seeing her, he should understand that I gave up everything. He cant even keep his words. I love him so much more than myself. I am so weak when it comes to him and her. I wanted to go home, they said we need counseling. i dont know what to do..... He ignores my feeling.

Please i need ur advice hudband and wife's opinion.

He's 38 im 25...

hi,

are you the one from davao? di na ako nakabalita sayo nkita ko na lang na kinasal ka na...and in your pictures you are both so in love...its just sad that her gf is causing trouble to your relationship.

magseselos ako kung ako ang nasa situation mo. i will tell my hubby to stay away from her though they maybe close friends or more than that but hey theres always limitations...if your hubby cant see and feel that your hurting then he must be insensitive or he just dont care that much to your feelings because he also care for the other girl.

[jOHnLei 0]

Yes, ako tong taga Davao that u chat before. I agree he's very insensitive, i am not happy with what he's doing. I told him most of the time to stay away from her. i let him choose bet. me and her and he chooses me its so unfair she knows whats going on our marriage. I feel he needed a friend not a wife. i am so sad, i even dont have any divertion.

[Gumbolette 58]

I can say that your husband has no amount of respect for you. He doesn't care what you feel, he doesn't care what his acts affects your marriage. And he is choosing this girl over you... the wife.

How can he treat you like this when he knows that the root of every argument you both have is that "FRIEND" next door.

Girl, save yourself from deeper heartache. This man will not stop his acts until he sees you broken into pieces.

I know there is the other side of the page but, as you have mentioned... you spoke with him about this issue couple of times and still, he seems doesn't care at all.

Talk to him once again, and tell him that you are not happy about what is happening between you and him. if he continues to have such a colorful friendship with your neighbor, CUT THE ####### and go home. You will find a man more worthy of your time, love and affection.

Edited January 4, 2010 by LÜvtechwifey

[Loolie 56]

Yes, ako tong taga Davao that u chat before. I agree he's very insensitive, i am not happy with what he's doing. I told him most of the time to stay away from her. i let him choose bet. me and her and he chooses me its so unfair she knows whats going on our marriage. I feel he needed a friend not a wife. i am so sad, i even dont have any divertion.

of course he will choose you because the other girl will always be there for him...i say his greedy...maybe he didnt feel so much attention and love from other people when he was young thats why he is taking advantage of all the people surrounding him...

i feel sorry for you...its either go with the flow or leave...kasi hubby mo yung makakasolve ng problem nyo if he will change.

[roseTX 0]

grab the opportunity that you are here, find a job and dump him,, he does not respect you at all...

[SunShineFL 0]

talk to the girl and tell her that you're not comfortable with her calling your husband in the wee hours and that you would appreciate it if she would find someone other than your husband to drive her to anywhere she wants to go. seek counseling before its too late. be strong..

[jOHnLei 0]

I can say that your husband has no amount of respect for you. He doesn't care what you feel, he doesn't care what his acts affects your marriage. And he is choosing this girl over you... the wife.

How can he treat you like this when he knows that the root of every argument you both have is that "FRIEND" next door.

Girl, save yourself from deeper heartache. This man will not stop his acts until he sees you broken into pieces.

I know there is the other side of the page but, as you have mentioned... you spoke with him about this issue couple of times and still, he seems doesn't care at all.

Talk to him once again, and tell him that you are not happy about what is happening between you and him. if he continues to have such a colorful friendship with your neighbor, CUT THE ####### and go home. You will find a man more worthy of your time, love and affection.

You made me cry, thank u for the words. I agree with everything u had said. He is acting like a child, he escapes, he cant even deal the arguements longer coz instead of discussing this problem seriously he'll talk to that girl. He leaves the house w/o saying a word to me, he'd rather tell her mom where his going. He can tell me coz i know he'll come over to that friends house. Everytime i started the conversation about them he doesnt bother talking about it at all he thinks i always build arguements that he dont like. The love is there, its so sad that my love for him kills me into pieces. I am so hurt right at this moment.

grab the opportunity that you are here, find a job and dump him,, he does not respect you at all...

ive been told about that with some friends back home. cant do those stuffs yet, we never started our AOS yet..

talk to the girl and tell her that you're not comfortable with her calling your husband in the wee hours and that you would appreciate it if she would find someone other than your husband to drive her to anywhere she wants to go. seek counseling before its too late. be strong..

thank you, i appreciate what u had said. i do need to be strong for this situation. she cant be told she's a ######.

of course he will choose you because the other girl will always be there for him...i say his greedy...maybe he didnt feel so much attention and love from other people when he was young thats why he is taking advantage of all the people surrounding him...

i feel sorry for you...its either go with the flow or leave...kasi hubby mo yung makakasolve ng problem nyo if he will change.

i agree with u, sometimes i can go with the flow but its hurting me. not so sure if he'll change........ i doubt it..

[Dakine 26]

You made me cry, thank u for the words. I agree with everything u had said. He is acting like a child, he escapes, he cant even deal the arguements longer coz instead of discussing this problem seriously he'll talk to that girl. He leaves the house w/o saying a word to me, he'd rather tell her mom where his going. He can tell me coz i know he'll come over to that friends house. Everytime i started the conversation about them he doesnt bother talking about it at all he thinks i always build arguements that he dont like. The love is there, its so sad that my love for him kills me into pieces. I am so hurt right at this moment.

ive been told about that with some friends back home. cant do those stuffs yet, we never started our AOS yet..

thank you, i appreciate what u had said. i do need to be strong for this situation. she cant be told she's a ######.

i agree with u, sometimes i can go with the flow but its hurting me. not so sure if he'll change........ i doubt it..

What does her BF have to say about all this?

Hint! Don't get pregnant!

Edited January 4, 2010 by Dakine

[Mario&Cath 1]

You made me cry, thank u for the words. I agree with everything u had said. He is acting like a child, he escapes, he cant even deal the arguements longer coz instead of discussing this problem seriously he'll talk to that girl. He leaves the house w/o saying a word to me, he'd rather tell her mom where his going. He can tell me coz i know he'll come over to that friends house. Everytime i started the conversation about them he doesnt bother talking about it at all he thinks i always build arguements that he dont like. The love is there, its so sad that my love for him kills me into pieces. I am so hurt right at this moment.

ive been told about that with some friends back home. cant do those stuffs yet, we never started our AOS yet..

thank you, i appreciate what u had said. i do need to be strong for this situation. she cant be told she's a ######.

i agree with u, sometimes i can go with the flow but its hurting me. not so sure if he'll change........ i doubt it..

Stay strong sorry to say your husband is truely a idiot. He need to stop taking you for granted if he loves you truely he would never want to see you hurting like this.It justn ot fair 2 you. Keep your head up.

[jOHnLei 0]

What does her BF have to say about all this?

Hint! Don't get pregnant!

I am not sure if she really has Bf.... our plan is 2yrs before getting pregnant..

[SunShineFL 0]

What does her BF have to say about all this?

Hint! Don't get pregnant!

Listen to Dakine about this!

[Mr.&Mrs.A 0]

Unfortunately you were deceived and once the trust has been broken its never the same, you will never be able to completely trust him again. That is so very sad, you went a long ways to complete his life. If everything is as exactly as you stated then you need to give serious thought to moving on with your life. I'm certain you deserve better.

[marklovetina 52]

I can say that your husband has no amount of respect for you. He doesn't care what you feel, he doesn't care what his acts affects your marriage. And he is choosing this girl over you... the wife.

How can he treat you like this when he knows that the root of every argument you both have is that "FRIEND" next door.

Girl, save yourself from deeper heartache. This man will not stop his acts until he sees you broken into pieces.

I know there is the other side of the page but, as you have mentioned... you spoke with him about this issue couple of times and still, he seems doesn't care at all.

Talk to him once again, and tell him that you are not happy about what is happening between you and him. if he continues to have such a colorful friendship with your neighbor, CUT THE ####### and go home. You will find a man more worthy of your time, love and affection.

i agree with her post... oi sis grabe namn yang asawa mo... dba kadarating mo lang jan tapos ganyan na yan... natatakot tuloy ako sa mga nababasa ko dito honestly bka mamaya naku!!!... ako sis hindi ko kya ung situation mo naku pag siguro ako ang ganyan uuwi na ko d2 sa atin... sorry tlga sis sa situation mo ha... maski ako naiiyak ako sa post mo... ako kc selosa din ako, eh di lalo na pag ganyan na ang situation.... hay naku talk to him for the last time sis and make a decision, hay... pray for u lei... ingat ka... and pls. dont' get pregnant pag-ganyan ung situation mo... naku napaka-insensitive ng hubby mo sis.. ganyan din ung X ko dati sobrang sira ang ulo napaka-insensitive...

[danvil101 0]

Talk to your hubby about the idea of moving in to other state, far from where you live right now. Maybe if they will be away from each other will change the situation. If that girl is a real "friend", then she will understand that the guy who's always been there for her is already married and has other priorities than her.

Get his attention. Maybe he was just too busy with his "friend" to the point that he's becoming insensitive and almost forgot that he's already married. Ask for a chance. A chance to prove him that you're better than anyone else. And if that chance arrives, don't let it go, be at your best and make him realize that it all worth it.

Just my opinion.