K1 Visa Overstay and 10 year Ban

[HahvahdYahd 1]

 

 

Hey guys, I’ve been willing to post here about my  case, but I had to make sure I’d research really well first. I even went through posts here on VJ.

 

Okay, so I met this dude back in 2013 online. April 2014 he decided to move to Brazil to study (free college!) and from starting as friends, we became a couple. We lived together in the same house, we got a civil union november same year, so I could get him medical insurance and life insurance from my job. He was teaching English at the time, and out of bad fiinancial decisions we got in debt, and trying to make ends meet. February 2016 we decided we should give the US a shot. He went back to the US same month and started taking care of the papers for my K1. I got my k1 visa in September 2015, and got to the US on the 29th.

 

We married December 21st 2015, and everything was good. We were happy after being apart for 7 months. During winter 2016, In Boston, we were facing financial problems again. But basically because he refused to try and get a stable income job - since he was used to teach English to Brazilians, and the money was very unsteady of course. I couldn’t work since I didn't have a permit. But even still I went to find a gig or something to help, cause you know, I wouldn’t just sit there. But the money I made was even less compared to what he made. All that stress led us to fight countless times, and we could never save enough for the papers.

 

So although we did get married, we had a delay in sending the AOS documents. In fact it never happened. So it was around june 2016, I did more gigs (I shouldn’t have, I know!) and we finanly got enough money for the papers, and we knew being a little late wouldn’t be such a big deal, since we did a lot of research. June 2016 was also when he met this guy that used to be student of his, and broke up with me saying it wasn’t working for him, so imagine how shocked I was.. 2 weeks later he moves into this guy's house. It was so sudden and quick. And there’s more. He wanted me to sign the divorce papers same month, so he could marry this guy, and I really think the guy wanted the papers, he’s been here illegally. Emotionally I was a wreck, lost, in pieces. Got depressed and was alone. Made me believe it was us the reason for splitting up, when the truth is abandoned me for another guy.

 

That went on, and I think less than a month later the guy breaks up with him and goes back to his ex. I guess I was so out of it that I just wanted him back. I understand he did a really bad thing, but I was (and still am) in another country on the other side of the globe. We lived together since the beginning, we suffered together before, we overcame so many problems together, so his sudden leaving really felt like the end of the world to me, no kidding. So we got back together. Now I know all the sentimental side of this won’t matter to USCIS but, January this year I was the one broke up with him, since he said he loved me but never did anything for us to rent an apartment (yes, we were living separate since he left), he was in another city and barely wanted to see me anymore, despite all my efforts to be together. Well, he started talking to this new guy after 1 week of the 2 break up! That was in January this year. Blocked me in every social media you can think. Went to Brazil to visit his new boyfriend 2 months ago, while I’m still stuck in the US. Since then he decided he’s moving back to Brazil in July, for good, to live with the new boyfriend. Sounds familiar?

 

And what is the problem? Well, after months in a dark place, disoriented, with no legal rights to get a job, nor to see my family, I am still in the Grey Area, and by leaving, I will get a 10 year ban. I find this extremely unfair, that guys s’d me over. All his friends think he did a bad thing (not to use cuss words), but believe it or not, some actually support him. I saw a lawyer about two weeks ago,he confirmed about the ban. I am 21 years old. My ex’s 22. It makes me extremely sad to think I might not come back to visit friends and I made, and people that took care of me during the worst time of my young life. I can’t come back to visit, or for work, or anything. It wouldn’t be a big deal for me if this wasn’t the world’s political and economical capital. It makes me sad and mad at the same time. Not to mention how it might be in the way of me getting any kind of visa in the future, it’ll always be grounds for a visa denial.

 

I plan on seeing another attorney, but have you guys heard of a similar case? I’d do anything to not get this ban, it is so unfair. Our relationship had been always good, and then he blew it and showed his childish side. Only reason I didn’t leave was I’d already get this ban, and we were going to send the papers anyways, cause we were toghether back then. And now here I am, not knowing what to do next. He ruined my life in so many ways. I healed emotionally it’s been 2 months, but all the consequences I’m about to face… He doesn’t even care. He’s moving in a few weeks. Said he’s sorry and told me to marry someone else in the future… I feel so hopeless, deep down I feel like she should pay for being so irresponsible and putting me in this situation, and I don’t know if there’s anything I can do. I literally relied on him for anything in this country, from a job to everything else and he deserted me. But once again, not only on the emotional side, but also as a partner.

 

Is there anything I can do to not be banned? Can I sue him? I don’t want to fight for a GC, I feel totally impaired having to rely on him and my life here. Anyways… Sorry for the long post, any input will be appreciated, I’m can’t seem fo find a way out of this. Thank you so much.

Edited June 5, 2017 by HahvahdYahd

[f f 725]

sue him for what? it did not work out and you guys were dragging your feet on the paperwork.  he has no legal obligation to file the paperwork nor to support you. if you two had filed the aos paperwork then he would have to reimburse the us government if you became a public charge. sadly with the k1 the only person you can gain legal status through is your ex and there is no scorned lover exception. there is vawa but nothing you said would suggest you were abused and also you would have needed physical proof of that abuse not just a statement claiming abuse.

[Jojo92122 1,924]

Sorry about your situation.

 

As a K-1 overstay, your only way to become legal is through your husband.  Marrying another US citizen would not allow you to adjust status.  This is one of the limitation of the K-1.  As long as you stay in the US, you will be an undocumented immigrant without the ability to become legal forever.

 

If you leave the US, there is no way for you to avoid the ban.

 

You can sue him, but why?  No lawyer will take your case without a large retainer.  Even if you win, you can't squeeze blood from a stone - he has no money so what would you squeeze out of him?  You may have a much better chance of suing him in Brazil.  

 

If you want revenge, go home to Brazil and sue him there.  Ruin his life in Brazil.  See if you can get him kicked out for good so he has to come back to the US and his miserable life.  A gringo teaching English in Brazil is valuable, not so much if he is kicked out and has to return to the US where no one will hire him as an English teacher.  He can go back to living off a crappy job.

[geowrian 22,335]

I'm sorry for the difficult path you've endured.

 

Sorry, but to be direct: you're not in a gray area...you overstayed your I-94 and have no status nor authorized stay. You can be deported at any time.

 

Your first attorney is correct. You will incur the 10 year ban upon exit from the US. There's no way for you to avoid this. Marriage to anybody else won't permit you to AOS since you came in via a K-1...that's a strict requirement of the K-1 visa process.

 

What would you sue him for exactly? Unless I missed something, I don't see a means to sue, nor what you would be able to recoup as a result.

 

Edit: Just to others reading this in the future...be sure you go with the best visa for your individual circumstances. It sounds like a CR-1 would have been better in this case since 1) it's cheaper, 2) it grants the ability to work immediately, and 3) avoids the potential issue of being out of status if things don't work out. Financial troubles preventing somebody from filing for AOS is a very common issue, and can lead to negative consequences in the relationship.

Edited June 5, 2017 by geowrian

[Hypnos 6,576]

You have no good options, sorry.

[HahvahdYahd 1]

38 minutes ago, f f said:

sue him for what? it did not work out and you guys were dragging your feet on the paperwork.  he has no legal obligation to file the paperwork nor to support you. if you two had filed the aos paperwork then he would have to reimburse the us government if you became a public charge. sadly with the k1 the only person you can gain legal status through is your ex and there is no scorned lover exception. there is vawa but nothing you said would suggest you were abused and also you would have needed physical proof of that abuse not just a statement claiming abuse.

Yes, I'm aware he has no legal obligation to file the paperwork, but he did have the obligation to make sure things went smoothly and he neglected that, and I can sure say it's not like I could just leave, like I said I was dependend on him entirely, didn't even have money to get on a plane and leave. I'm not playing the victim, but for me that is called being. It's not like I had any other option

[HahvahdYahd 1]

40 minutes ago, Jojo92122 said:

Sorry about your situation.

 

As a K-1 overstay, your only way to become legal is through your husband.  Marrying another US citizen would not allow you to adjust status.  This is one of the limitation of the K-1.  As long as you stay in the US, you will be an undocumented immigrant without the ability to become legal forever.

 

If you leave the US, there is no way for you to avoid the ban.

 

You can sue him, but why?  No lawyer will take your case without a large retainer.  Even if you win, you can't squeeze blood from a stone - he has no money so what would you squeeze out of him?  You may have a much better chance of suing him in Brazil.  

 

If you want revenge, go home to Brazil and sue him there.  Ruin his life in Brazil.  See if you can get him kicked out for good so he has to come back to the US and his miserable life.  A gringo teaching English in Brazil is valuable, not so much if he is kicked out and has to return to the US where no one will hire him as an English teacher.  He can go back to living off a crappy job.

I don't like the word 'revenge' coming from myself, but that guy got me miserable for months, it's unbelievable what I got into. But you got a point there, I understand. Thank you so so much for taking your time to give your input. I appreciate it.

[HahvahdYahd 1]

1 hour ago, geowrian said:

I'm sorry for the difficult path you've endured.

 

Sorry, but to be direct: you're not in a gray area...you overstayed your I-94 and have no status nor authorized stay. You can be deported at any time.

 

Your first attorney is correct. You will incur the 10 year ban upon exit from the US. There's no way for you to avoid this. Marriage to anybody else won't permit you to AOS since you came in via a K-1...that's a strict requirement of the K-1 visa process.

 

What would you sue him for exactly? Unless I missed something, I don't see a means to sue, nor what you would be able to recoup as a result.

 

Edit: Just to others reading this in the future...be sure you go with the best visa for your individual circumstances. It sounds like a CR-1 would have been better in this case since 1) it's cheaper, 2) it grants the ability to work immediately, and 3) avoids the potential issue of being out of status if things don't work out. Financial troubles preventing somebody from filing for AOS is a very common issue, and can lead to negative consequences in the relationship.

I don't know exactly what you can sue a person for. I just felt like this was very unfair, to be dependent on him all this time and be the one who'll lose. I guess Justice isn't always fair is it? Yes people, please be careful. I do not wish this to anyone, I am in a bizarre situation here. 

Thank you so for your input

[Jojo92122 1,924]

22 minutes ago, HahvahdYahd said:

I don't know exactly what you can sue a person for. I just felt like this was very unfair, to be dependent on him all this time and be the one who'll lose. I guess Justice isn't always fair is it? Yes people, please be careful. I do not wish this to anyone, I am in a bizarre situation here. 

Thank you so for your input

You can sue a person for a legal obligation.  You can not sue for a moral obligation.  You really have no basis to sue him.

 

Don't take this the wrong way.  You should have been responsible for knowing the downsides of using a K-1 with a person who has bad finances.  While you are in a "bizarre situation," there are plenty of examples on VJ of women who arrive to the US on K-1 visas knowing their spouses can not afford to file AOS for them and the chaos that follows.  The onus in on people knowing what they are getting themselves into with a K-1 visa.

 

Sorry about your situation, but there is no hope for you in the US.  You can choose to stay an undocumented immigrant or return home and serve your 10 years ban.  Sorry.

[f f 725]

10 hours ago, HahvahdYahd said:

Yes, I'm aware he has no legal obligation to file the paperwork, but he did have the obligation to make sure things went smoothly and he neglected that, and I can sure say it's not like I could just leave, like I said I was dependend on him entirely, didn't even have money to get on a plane and leave. I'm not playing the victim, but for me that is called being. It's not like I had any other option

he may of had a moral duty to do that but people are immoral and there is no law against this type of immorality.

 

this is an example of the risk of the k1. since it is a non immigrant visa you have to right to remain in the us. all that the visa does is allow you to come here with the desire to marry and adjust. you married which was the first part of the k1 but both partners must agree to do the adjustment of status and follow it through, if either wants to they can stop the process and there is nothing the other person can do.

[Transborderwife 4,666]

Look I see where you're coming from with emotional neglect, but unfortunately you took a risk and it failed.  Time to go.

[Pennycat 880]

Sorry, this is a difficult position. Unfortunately, the time to get any compensation for playing casually with your life was during the divorce and even then I don't think you could have gotten anything  (blood from a stone etc). You took a big risk (fiance visa is risky for this exact reason-- the immigrant arrives completely dependent on the petitioner with the green card on the line) and it didn't work out. The only way to adjust status from a K1 is with the original petitioner, and that avenue sounds like it's closed (and honestly, it should be. You don't need to stay with someone who treats you like that). You're young and haven't been here that long in the grand scheme of things.

 

If I were in your shoes, I'd cut my losses and go home and work on building a great life there. You're so young that you'll still be young in 10 years AND on top of it, the bans are waivable. Staying without status and no way to GET status is just going to push this problem further down the road and multiply it. The longer you stay and build a life here, the more you have to lose.

[C-ma'am 684]

**Post moved from K1 to Effects of Major Family Changers on Immigration Benefits, where similar topics are discussed.

[discoverusa 229]

13 hours ago, HahvahdYahd said:

We lived together in the same house, we got a civil union november same year, so I could get him medical insurance and life insurance from my job.

Is civil union the same as civil marriage? The city hall/court marriage? It probably doesn't even matter at this point, but if you were technically married in Brazil, why did you get K1 as opposed to CR-1 visa?

[Villanelle 4,121]

This might sound harsh but IMO you need to take more personal responsibility. All I see in your postings are variations of "he was suppose to do XYZ, this is his fault" etc. YOU made the choice to stay. You were issued a K visa and entered Sept 29th. You had 90 days on that visa to marry and needed to file for adjustment of status promptly. If not in the 90 days then asap. You dont incur a ban until 180 days, which would have been 3 yrs. You passed that mark and are now facing the 10 yr ban. So where was your choice? It was to stay past the 180 days after your visa expired with out filing AOS. You made that choice. You can blame it on him if you feel he misled you, but the choice to remain with out filing AOS was yours. It was always yours. You made the wrong choice. Its a hard life lesson.

People will understand that you can not enter the US and shouldnt harbor bad feelings towards you for not coming back to visit them when you are legally not allowed to. Also Im not saying the US isnt "great" but it isnt the only "great" place on Earth. Stop looking at the past, what happened happened. Accept your fault in it. Learn from it and move on.