Looking to get a divorce or annulment from k1 wife. How can I protect myself.

[Transborderwife 4,666]

3 minutes ago, Eric-Pris said:

So let her stay.  If she wants to be another illegal, why should you care?  You didn't sign a sponsorship form, so she can't get anything from you.  Avoid being with her as much as possible.  If you feel she is capable of false accusations, look at my previous suggestion about cameras.  Yu don't need her permission.  They are SECURITY cameras. 

 

About it being legal to record... Are we saying that some burglar may object in court of being recorded.  And if it happens to catch her false accusing you, that's just one of those lucky breaks.

Some states are two party consent, not many: California, Connecticut, Florida, Illinois, Maryland, Massachusetts, Montana, New Hampshire, Pennsylvania and Washington both parties must consent to a conversation being recorded

[Transborderwife 4,666]

1 hour ago, Chardon Ne' said:

Why do you say that. Im really curious. 

Because it's been seen here before that an annulment does not annul immigration benefits

[thegreatwm 6]

23 minutes ago, Eric-Pris said:

This might sound a bit much, but I would install some hidden cameras around the house with a DVR recording 24/7.  Hell, it's your future, freedom, criminal record, reputation, etc. at stake.

 

IMO, it's a another case of misaligned expectations.  She thought that she was coming to paradise with money trees, etc.  The reality of America didn't match her expectations.

She didn't scam you for immigration purposes.  She just realized that it's not what she expected.  If she wanted a divorce so she could stay here or she was pushing you to do her AOS right away, then you'd be suspicious.  But when they WANT to go home, it's not fraud.

 

 

 

 

I disagree. As I mentioned earlier, all of our plans changed the second she arrived. Things we discussed over the 2+ years of being together were null and void as soon as she arrived. We were supposed to be building our life but as soon as she arrived, she was only interesting in building her life. We discussed have kids before she came and she said she couldn't wait to get pregnant. As soon as she got here, she said she wanted to wait several years to get pregnant. She said she would take my name before she came. After we got married, she said she didn't want to take my name. We were intimate before she came. Since she's been here, we have not been intimate or had sex. She said she wanted to wait. Again, we were glorified roommates where I was paying all the bills. If this isn't fraud then I don't know what is.

[thegreatwm 6]

35 minutes ago, Eric-Pris said:

So let her stay.  If she wants to be another illegal, why should you care?  You didn't sign a sponsorship form, so she can't get anything from you.  Avoid being with her as much as possible.  If you feel she is capable of false accusations, look at my previous suggestion about cameras.  Yu don't need her permission.  They are SECURITY cameras. 

 

About it being legal to record... Are we saying that some burglar may object in court of being recorded.  And if it happens to catch her false accusing you, that's just one of those lucky breaks.

I will get cameras installed although I don't have any intention of seeing her again. Also, I care because I was the one that was manipulated. I don't even think I could sleep at night knowing that the past 2 years of my life has been a lie. This isn't about revenge, it's about doing what's right.

Edited January 13, 2017 by Ban Hammer
profanity

[andy78 178]

39 minutes ago, Transborderwife said:

State depending that may not be legal

The simple act of changing the door locks by the home owner is perfectly legal. What will vary by state is whether she has a right to re-enter the house and resume living there.

[geowrian 22,335]

2 hours ago, thegreatwm said:

I've been reading the forum for the past couple hours and I am now almost 100% sure that she will try to still get AOS through VAWA. Would there be any benefit for me to call the ICE hotline and report fraud? Her visa expired but we got married within 90 days so I'm not sure how that works. Also, I think I can qualify for an annulment based on fraud. We didn't have sex and since she came, all of the household decisions have been to her benefit. Had I known these things before, I would have never married her. Therefore, I feel like I was manipulated and this is fraud. I have not contacted her on her phone since she left and I have no intentions of doing so either.

First, is she past 90 days from her entry? If so, and without AIS filed, she is out of status due to overstay. At which point, you could report it, but the fact that you are still married to her and it's not a significant amount of time that she has overstayed, I wouldn't expect them to take action. But having it on file is definitely to your benefit.

 

Sorry, but that's not evidence of fraud. I know you feel wronged, but you have not provided any evidence of fraud...only suspicion. Suspicion won't get the authorities involved, nor will it justify an annulment. I'm not saying she hasn't committed fraud - just that you have not provided any evidence of it. When it comes to both legal and immigration matters, evidence is key. In my opinion, it sounds like she either thought things were going to be a lot different in the US, so she's just disappointed and wants to go home, OR maybe she knew somebody else in the US to support her...? I money is on the former since I doubt she would have actually gotten married in the first place if she was there for another reason, but not stayed for at least AOS. If she was trying to defraud you, she really didn't pick a good way/time to doing it.

 

If she wants to claim DV and make up some story, she can. But without any proof, she honestly won't get far. I know the media makes it seem otherwise, but those types of matters are taken very seriously and false claims are investigated. Either way, it does help to protect yourself. The outdoor security cameras are a good, legal method to help. In-home cameras, in most states, would probably not be permissible and could even get you in trouble. If they were installed while she was there, that's one thing .If you install them in private spaces without her knowledge after she left, then nobody's going to believe it was for security. The public-facing cameras, however, doesn't really matter as she has no reasonable expectation of privacy.

 

As others stated, don't file AOS, file for divorce, and then do whatever you can to get her back home. Once she's out of the US, she won't be able to get back in without a new visa.

Edited January 13, 2017 by geowrian

[Boiler 43,432]

VAWA is extremely well covered on VJ, plenty of examples where you may think it would not be approved, but it does.

 

Obviously you need to know how to play the game, and who knows if in this case she does.

[-Dalliance- 7]

5 hours ago, kareelina said:

As long as she doesn't want you to apply for AOS for her and she would rather go back home , that means she hates being there , and I don't think she intends to cause you harm , all what she wants is to go back to her home country , I think she doesn't feel safe with you there , help her go back home and don't worry about your house , it obvious that you didn't even try to talk to her about what bothers her or made her change that way . 

I don't know why you would come here, make a bunch of assumptions, and then accuse the OP of behaviour you think he showed. How dare you. 

 

Read a little further into the thread, and you'll see that his wife did a complete 180 immediately after marriage. In this forum, we're certainly allowed to read between the lines, but when you suggest things for which there is NO EVIDENCE WHATSOEVER, you're not acting in good faith. You think his wife "doesn't feel safe with him"?! Where did you get that impression? Seriously. 

 

You're supposed to assume, when an OP makes statements of fact, that they're actually telling the truth (if there's no solid reason to believe otherwise). Because if you don't do that, then this place would devolve into a toxic and unhelpful forum where people don't take statements at face value and thereby hurt all the OP's who are truly telling the truth.

 

The OP in this case explained that his wife seemed to have been bluffing with her offer to move back to her home country. When he subsequently offered to pay for her ticket home, she refused. Then she moved out without a word. Those aren't the actions of someone who "just wants to go home" and "doesn't intend to cause harm". 

 

And according to you, it's "obvious" that he "didn't even try to talk to her about what bothers her or made her change that way"? What in the world. How could you possibly know that? What if he did bring up his concerns? What if nothing is bothering her, and she simply wanted to commit fraud in order to live in the States? That's a possibility, too, you know. USCIS warns citizen spouses about it all the time. 

 

Also, if a spouse changes that quickly upon marriage, withholds sex from their partner, suddenly doesn't want to change their name, and doesn't want to do any of the things that were previously and mutually planned out, then it's THAT person's responsibility to tell their partner what's going on in their head. Otherwise, what else are you supposed to think except that it was a bait-and-switch, given the context of the case, especially when fraud is rampant? 

 

I can't believe you wrote those things in all seriousness. I'm actually disgusted on the OP's behalf.

 

 

.

 

Edited January 13, 2017 by -Dalliance-
(Typo)

[Ebunoluwa 6,136]

Should you ever find yourself in the situation where you feel you want to petition someone else from a foreign country years

from now it is best to have documentation that you did inform USCIS or ICE that she left. Even though they won't do anything

to track her (that may or may not change in the future) you would be a bit less scrutinized with another petition, meaning in regards
to petitioners being payed for giving beneficiaries immigration benefits. You would have proof you informed them because she left.
Whether she committed fraud or just feels like she didn't fit in is not up to anyone to decide,  it is a possibility that she is just very unhappy

and withdrew from you.
That is a call only you can come to grips with.

Sorry that happened and I wish you well.

[Daisy.Chain 317]

5 hours ago, Russ&Caro said:

 

This would be pretty hard to do. They don't let people who don't have a ticket into the gate area at US airports and unless the departure airport is really small, you have no way to see if she gets on the plane. And, of course, if it's a small airport, chances are it doesn't have direct international flights.

 

The only conceivable way to do this is to buy yourself a cheapo ticket to somewhere that you don't intend to use to allow you into the gate area. Seems like a lot of hassle.

Technically, I believe most airports do allow a translator (is you) to go with someone with a low grasp of the English language. I've gone back with my husband and his mom and sister on several occasions - and a good thing, too, as it turned out. I just bring my id and ask permission to help out. It takes an extra 15 minutes near the baggage claim gate.

Edited January 14, 2017 by Daisy.Chain
Grammar

[Davejj 31]

9 hours ago, thegreatwm said:

No I think she intends to stay or else she wouldn't have tried so hard to come. She said all the right things before just so she could be here and from the first week she arrived, everything changed. We've been living like glorified roommates. I don't think it's fair that she can manipulate the system to try to stay here but I feel that this is what will happen.

You should report her missing 

[TBoneTX 43,058]

One post above is rather harsh toward another poster.  Please ensure that posts deal with the OP's situation and aren't directed against another participant.

---

[Moderator hat off]

OP, collect whatever hard evidence you have, set an InfoPass appointment, and be sure to speak with the FDNS officer.  Get something on file, and retain the officer's name plus details of the visit in your permanent records.  Do this sooner rather than later.

[Yanaris 4]

All Immigrants think that in the US the streets are paved with gold.  But they get here and quickly learn three things:  1.  The streets aren't paved with gold.  2.  The streets need paving.  3.  They're the ones that will be paving them.

 

I have a few questions:  If she just walked out on you, where did she go?  Does she know someone here?  Does she know someone she can live with?  Did you have the money necessary to survive on her own?  

 

I would be very suspicious of her real intentions.  Did she already have someone here and just used you for a Visa and plane fare?  Did she have the opportunity to meet someone else that quickly? 

 

I once did a K-1 for a Nigerian woman and she was nothing but trouble, but she wasn't as bad as this one sounds.  I ended up getting my ex-wife to join the Army.  That move worked out for us both.

 

Sorry about your troubles, try to work through the problem.  

[thegreatwm 6]

Well I guess the whole walking out thing was a bluff. She was just around the corner still with her bags packed. She's back home now with me because I can't just leave her out there like that. I'll see what happens.

[Transborderwife 4,666]

4 hours ago, thegreatwm said:

Well I guess the whole walking out thing was a bluff. She was just around the corner still with her bags packed. She's back home now with me because I can't just leave her out there like that. I'll see what happens.

Best of luck to you both