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Separation and immigration

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Long story short, I'm going through a rough patch with my husband, I'm currently in the U.S., I'm not yet a citizen, I would like to go back to my home country, we are on the verge of separation and I don't know where to turn. I literally have nothing, I know my ability to stay here glides out the window with my marriage if we divorce and was wondering if anyone has any idea how to deal with being stranded here, with 3 children, no money and no family to help me out? Is there anywhere I can turn to for a loan or anything as a non citizen, to get "home", rather than stay in a toxic marriage just because I'm helpless and have no access to money.

Thanks for your time!

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Contact your home country's embassy for repatriation loan.


Removal of Conditions Journey

3/3/2009 - Removal of conditions - sent off packet to CSC

3/5/2009 - I-751 received in CSC

3/9/2009 - Check cashed

3/20/2009 - Biometrics notice received (no NOA1)

4/2/2009 - Biometrics

4/9/2009 - NOA1 date (first undelivered one is 3/5)

4/3/2009 - Touch?

5/6/2009 - ROC Approval - 65 days

6/22/2009 - CRIS Card production ordered email

7/7/2009 - GC arrived!

Naturalization Journey

3/03/2010 N400 sent to Arizona Lockbox

3/15/2010 Check cashed

3/17/2010 NOA1

3/18/2010 - Biometrics notice sent

3/26/2010 Early biometrics done at an ASC different from the one assigned to (Original BIO date was 4/15)

4/30/2010 Yellow letter received and info from USCIS mil line they are working on my interview letter (6/17 appt)

5/1/2010 Text and email interview letter sen

5/6/2010 Interview letter received - scheduled for 6/17/2010 at 10:05am

6/17/2010 Interview appointment - PASSED

6/29/2010 US Citizen

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Will your spouse agree to you taking the children?


“If you know the enemy and know yourself, you need not fear the result of a hundred battles. If you know yourself but not the enemy, for every victory gained you will also suffer a defeat. If you know neither the enemy nor yourself, you will succumb in every battle.”

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You don't necessarily need to return home. You can always divorce and AOS on your own when the time comes - your chances don't necessarily disappear if you end your marriage. If you want to leave however, the best course of action is to contact the nearest consular representative from your country in the US and get some advice. You will need legal advice for the divorce itself. In addition, if your children are his then you will also have to consider getting legal permission from the US courts to take the children with you if you decide to leave.

Good luck!

Long story short, I'm going through a rough patch with my husband, I'm currently in the U.S., I'm not yet a citizen, I would like to go back to my home country, we are on the verge of separation and I don't know where to turn. I literally have nothing, I know my ability to stay here glides out the window with my marriage if we divorce and was wondering if anyone has any idea how to deal with being stranded here, with 3 children, no money and no family to help me out? Is there anywhere I can turn to for a loan or anything as a non citizen, to get "home", rather than stay in a toxic marriage just because I'm helpless and have no access to money.

Thanks for your time!


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You didn't mention your immigration status. I assume (perhaps wrongly) that if you have 3 children, you've been married long enough to have your 10-year green card.

I don't know what your marital assets are, but you're entitled to basically 50% of whatever you accumulated together, even if it's in his name.

And if the children are his and they live with you, he will be required to pay child support commensurate with his income. However, you cannot just take the children home to your country. They are his children too. You would need his permission, or a court's permission, to take them with you, and I can't think of a reason a court would allow it if he objects. In fact, if you were to leave the USA and leave the children with him, you would probably have to pay him child support (although I'm not sure how that would be enforced if you're overseas).

I can tell you from experience two things about divorce:

a) Divorcing couples can make things a lot easier on them both by being cooperative and accepting the realities of their situation.

b) Very few divorcing couples do that.

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