Experiences of Discrimination Against Immigrants

[Transborderwife 4,666]

My mom suggested the same thing for my husband. But it doesn't cover up middle eastern appearances and accent. I didnt want my husband to change the name his mother gave him. I don't think we should have to change our appearances or our names for society to accept us. Its ludicrous to go from normal to out of the box to be accepted. Ie for a muslim man to take a Christian name. People should stand firm for who they are.

This is something that's been going on for a long, long time in the immigration world. Immigrants to Ellis island from places like Italy or Poland often had names changed. German immigrants would change their last name around the time of the Second World War. Asian families often give their child English names as well as cultural names simply to make life easier for them.

[El_killer47 22]

He'll dislike the ignorance but he'll learn to deal with it. But he wont hate it here. I was 12 when I came to US. We had a neighbour with an attitude who'd say things about going back to.. you know. I picked up on the fact that he was one of the few like that. The teachers and librarians and people everywhere were very kind. So I ignored him. He saw me growing up for years and when I was finally moving out to tge suburbs, he came upto me for a chat and to wish me luck and that he'll miss me. Imagine that! Funny, how it works. I guess people are just uncomfortable of who or whats unfamiliar at first.

Granted this is Nyc we're talking about but 15 years ago it wasnt as diverse as it is now.

[MouadsWife 161]

My best friend lives in Maryland and she covers and wears a hijab. As an American muslima she does not experience any racial problems. Everyone, no matter who you are should always be familiar with your surroundings. Yes there have been a couple instances, but overall, I do not think muslims are unsafe here and being targeted.

[MouadsWife 161]

This is something that's been going on for a long, long time in the immigration world. Immigrants to Ellis island from places like Italy or Poland often had names changed. German immigrants would change their last name around the time of the Second World War. Asian families often give their child English names as well as cultural names simply to make life easier for them.

But its just plain backwards. This is the time for acceptance. Just because you live in the land of horses and a turtle comes in... your going to say hey, "im a horse" and hope no one notices??? A name change isn't going to solve anything. Mohammed comes to United States and he has a thick middle eastern accent... and he renames himself 'Dave' so maybe people wont notice he's middle eastern or maybe he'll be liked more. People will be wondering wth are you named Dave!????? The whole concept is just backwards! Lololololol

[Transborderwife 4,666]

But its just plain backwards. This is the time for acceptance. Just because you live in the land of horses and a turtle comes in... your going to say hey, "im a horse" and hope no one notices??? A name change isn't going to solve anything. Mohammed comes to United States and he has a thick middle eastern accent... and he renames himself 'Dave' so maybe people wont notice he's middle eastern or maybe he'll be liked more. People will be wondering wth are you named Dave!????? The whole concept is just backwards! Lololololol

Wether it's backwards or not isn't the point. The point is it's something that is still heavily done. I grew up in Toronto where I had friends whose immigrant families named them westernized names at birth in their home country on hopes to get ahead.

[Smelserjl 137]

Hi everyone thanks for your input. He definitely doesn't plan to change his name and that has never come up at all. I think I'm more worried about it than he is of course, just because I worry about everything concerning his stay in the US. There's also a misconception about the US that everyone hates Muslims, all Americans have guns, etc. These are formed by American movies and shows as well as how the media portrays Americans. The same way our media portrays Muslims.

I hope we move closer to DC just for the multiculturalism if anything. There are quite a few pockets if particular kinds of religious and ethnic groups around cities that I'm aware of. And no, I don't plan to go into mosques to ask these things. Not because it's on his behalf necessarily and it's not my place, but because I'm learning about the politics of mosques in the US just like the politics of churches. We don't wanna go that route. Nor do we necessarily plan to live in some community that's egyptian or Arab or whatever. We will see I guess!

Edited May 31, 2015 by Smelserjl

[Unidentified 2,930]

Hi everyone thanks for your input. He definitely doesn't plan to change his name and that has never come up at all. I think I'm more worried about it than he is of course, just because I worry about everything concerning his stay in the US. There's also a misconception about the US that everyone hates Muslims, all Americans have guns, etc. These are formed by American movies and shows as well as how the media portrays Americans. The same way our media portrays Muslims.

I hope we move closer to DC just for the multiculturalism if anything. There are quite a few pockets if particular kinds of religious and ethnic groups around cities that I'm aware of. And no, I don't plan to go into mosques to ask these things. Not because it's on his behalf necessarily and it's not my place, but because I'm learning about the politics of mosques in the US just like the politics of churches. We don't wanna go that route. Nor do we necessarily plan to live in some community that's egyptian or Arab or whatever. We will see I guess!

Yes I like DC because there are so many cultures there because of the high level of tourists and also because so many people from all over move there to work and study. I also like Fairfax County which is not that far from DC. I have never seen so many different churches in one place before! Really love the mix of all the people and different cultures

[walrusbaby 20]

And why? Did you read the OP'S first post? Her husband is muslim, same as my husband. Is there another Islam category that I'm not aware of? I live in this faith/religion/culture everyday. If he is a practicing muslim...he will have the same viewpoints. A wife doesn't step on a husbands toes in some areas. I mean she has every right to do as she wants. Every is to each his own. I was simply saying to others that not all cultures are the same, and when we marry into a culture we have to respect or adopt certain things outside the usual american norm. Her doing that, going to a mosque to ask about employment for her husband, would be considered a slap in the face to her husband to most 95% of muslim men.

I am a Muslim and I don't think you know enough about Islam to talk about what Muslim men want or do not want. I see your husband is a Moroccan Muslim. Islam isn't the same in every country. A Turkish muslim would see it less as a "slap in the face" if his wife helped him. I'm sure a husband in Indonesia would react in another way. You think there's a "Muslim culture" when it's more probable that your husband reacts more in a cultural than religious way.

[CourMad 11]

Islam is a religion, it is different than a culture, a husband refusing his wife help is kinda foolish, but it is a culture thing, not islam thing.

another thing I would say, that they is always gonna be people hating people, people judging people (as the song says haters are gonna hate hate lol)

but anyways, discrimination and such things one faces in his/her own country.

just be optimistic and open, most of the people have a wrong idea about you from the media, try to change that picture, be friendly, answer questions, be someone who always smiles (a smile is considered a good deed in Islam, sadaqa) as if you have given money to the poor.

good luck

Edited May 31, 2015 by Penguin_ie

[Agonks 2]

There is a difference between Islam and the culture. Islam is not the culture. For example in my Country Republic of Kosovo religion is a private matter, not a public one, we never talk about it and we never ask people what religion they have. Even though over 90 % are declared as Muslim we are officially a secular country.

According to a 2013 and 2014 report by Freedom of Thought, Kosovo ranked first in the Balkans and ninth in the world as a "Free and equal" country for tolerance towards religion and atheism.^{[29][30] http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Demographics_of_Kosovo}

I will copy some text and past the full link http://www.city-journal.org/2008/18_4_kosovo_muslims.html

osovo’s brand of Islam may be the most liberal in the world. I saw no more women there wearing conservative Islamic clothing—one or two per day at most—than I’ve seen in Manhattan. There is no gender apartheid even in Kosovo’s villages. Alcohol flows freely in restaurants, cafés, and bars, where you’ll see as many young women in sexy outfits as you’d find in any Western European country. Aside from the minarets on the skyline, there is no visible evidence that Kosovo is a Muslim-majority country at all.

“Here people are Muslims, but they think like Europeans,” says Xhabir Hamiti, a professor in the Islamic studies department at the University of Pristina in Kosovo’s capital. “Muslims here identify themselves as Muslim Lite,” an American police officer tells me. As Afrim Kostrati, a young bartender, puts it: “We are Muslims, but not really.” And Luan Berisha, an entrepreneur, agrees: “We were never practicing Muslims like they are in the Middle East. . . . First of all, we are Albanians. Religion comes second.”

Religion in Kosovo is a private matter, not a public one. “We never talk about it,” Berisha says. “I just found out, one year ago, that a very good friend of mine is Catholic, and we have been friends for the last ten years.” One Muslim woman tells me how startled she was when she attended a conference in Britain about young people who change the world. “I was shocked to find that the representative of the U.S.A. was a covered lady, originally from Iraq,” she says. “And the representative from Canada was another, originally from Afghanistan.” She herself was wearing shorts.

The reason for Kosovo’s relaxed attitude toward religion lies in its history. Albanians, including those in Kosovo, are the descendants of ancient pagan Greeks and Illyrians; more recently, they were Christian before the majority converted to Islam under Turkish Ottoman rule. Their religion may be Eastern, but Albanians have been culturally European for all of recorded history. “The Greeks hardly regard them as Christians, or the Turks as Moslems, and in fact they are a mixture of both, and sometimes neither,” Lord Byron wrote of them almost 200 years ago. “We Albanians,” writes Catholic priest Dom Lush Gjergji, “descendants of the Illyrians, are Christians from the time of the Apostles. . . . Without Christianity there would be no Albanian people, language, culture, or traditions . . . Albanians consider Christianity their patrimony, their spiritual and cultural inheritance.”

Kosovar Muslims talk the same way. In fact, the feeling is reflected in the Albanian national flag,

Repeatedly, I heard that Kosovars were America’s most reliable allies in the world. American flags fly just about everywhere outside the Serbian enclaves—some even in front of official buildings—and are sold at kiosks on the street, along with T-shirts that say THANK YOU USA. The Hotel Victory has erected the world’s second-largest replica of the Statue of Liberty on its roof, and I found another replica in the southeastern town of Vitina. Kosovars are fans of George W. Bush, both because he recognized Kosovo’s independence and simply because he’s the president. Graffiti in one Kosovar village proclaims THANKS USA AND BUSH. “You should have seen President Bush’s face when he came to Albania,” says a Kosovar Albanian who works with the United States Agency for International Development (USAID). “All over Western Europe he was met by protests, but the entire country of Albania turned out to welcome him.”

[Penguin_ie 5,984]

***** One post edited for circumventing the language filter. This thread is also getting heated; this is your reminder to stay civil, and share your views politely, before we need to have thread bans and other admin action. ******

Edited May 31, 2015 by Penguin_ie

[Pranvera-Kreshnik 7]

There is a difference between Islam and the culture. Islam is not the culture. For example in my Country Republic of Kosovo religion is a private matter, not a public one, we never talk about it and we never ask people what religion they have. Even though over 90 % are declared as Muslim we are officially a secular country.

According to a 2013 and 2014 report by Freedom of Thought, Kosovo ranked first in the Balkans and ninth in the world as a "Free and equal" country for tolerance towards religion and atheism.^{[29][30] http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Demographics_of_Kosovo}

I will copy some text and past the full link http://www.city-journal.org/2008/18_4_kosovo_muslims.html

osovos brand of Islam may be the most liberal in the world. I saw no more women there wearing conservative Islamic clothingone or two per day at mostthan Ive seen in Manhattan. There is no gender apartheid even in Kosovos villages. Alcohol flows freely in restaurants, cafés, and bars, where youll see as many young women in sexy outfits as youd find in any Western European country. Aside from the minarets on the skyline, there is no visible evidence that Kosovo is a Muslim-majority country at all.

Here people are Muslims, but they think like Europeans, says Xhabir Hamiti, a professor in the Islamic studies department at the University of Pristina in Kosovos capital. Muslims here identify themselves as Muslim Lite, an American police officer tells me. As Afrim Kostrati, a young bartender, puts it: We are Muslims, but not really. And Luan Berisha, an entrepreneur, agrees: We were never practicing Muslims like they are in the Middle East. . . . First of all, we are Albanians. Religion comes second.

Religion in Kosovo is a private matter, not a public one. We never talk about it, Berisha says. I just found out, one year ago, that a very good friend of mine is Catholic, and we have been friends for the last ten years. One Muslim woman tells me how startled she was when she attended a conference in Britain about young people who change the world. I was shocked to find that the representative of the U.S.A. was a covered lady, originally from Iraq, she says. And the representative from Canada was another, originally from Afghanistan. She herself was wearing shorts.

The reason for Kosovos relaxed attitude toward religion lies in its history. Albanians, including those in Kosovo, are the descendants of ancient pagan Greeks and Illyrians; more recently, they were Christian before the majority converted to Islam under Turkish Ottoman rule. Their religion may be Eastern, but Albanians have been culturally European for all of recorded history. The Greeks hardly regard them as Christians, or the Turks as Moslems, and in fact they are a mixture of both, and sometimes neither, Lord Byron wrote of them almost 200 years ago. We Albanians, writes Catholic priest Dom Lush Gjergji, descendants of the Illyrians, are Christians from the time of the Apostles. . . . Without Christianity there would be no Albanian people, language, culture, or traditions . . . Albanians consider Christianity their patrimony, their spiritual and cultural inheritance.

Kosovar Muslims talk the same way. In fact, the feeling is reflected in the Albanian national flag,

Repeatedly, I heard that Kosovars were Americas most reliable allies in the world. American flags fly just about everywhere outside the Serbian enclavessome even in front of official buildingsand are sold at kiosks on the street, along with T-shirts that say THANK YOU USA. The Hotel Victory has erected the worlds second-largest replica of the Statue of Liberty on its roof, and I found another replica in the southeastern town of Vitina. Kosovars are fans of George W. Bush, both because he recognized Kosovos independence and simply because hes the president. Graffiti in one Kosovar village proclaims THANKS USA AND BUSH. You should have seen President Bushs face when he came to Albania, says a Kosovar Albanian who works with the United States Agency for International Development (USAID). All over Western Europe he was met by protests, but the entire country of Albania turned out to welcome him.

????

[KokiLulu 8]

OP, where in Virginia do you live? Definitely there are "pockets" of places all over the country that are worse than others. I reverted to Islam in January and have been wearing Hijab ever since. I was worried that I would be descriminated against but i have not experienced anything more than people being curious about why I am muslim and where i am from. I live in Silver Spring, MD, about 10 mins from DC. This area is very culturally and religiously diverse so for the most part people are very accepting of one another. There is Lutheran church, Mosque, Greek orthodox church, and Buddhist Temple standing right beside each other on the main road I live off of. I drive for Uber and in the beginning I was afraid the riders would be afraid of me or descriminate against me because of my hijab and because of the Islamophobia that exists among some. But I have not had any problems. Most people have been very kind. Many people are curious and aren't sure how to ask about my situation. They will usually start off by asking where I'm from but I can feel they really want to know how it is that I am muslim. I have had some great conversations with many of my riders about how I came to Islam. Mind you, I stay close to the DC metropolitan area when I drive so I am mostly in Northern Virginia, DC, and Montgomery and PG county, MD. A couple of times i have taken riders from DC to places further south in VA away from the city and I haven't felt as comfortable there. One girl was not being mean or anything but she couldn't get over the fact that I am muslim. She kept saying "I just don't get it, you're white...how are you muslim". More rural areas are less diverse and when something is unknown it is often feared. My family is from a tiny town in Mississippi where there is very little cultural or religious diversion. I went to visit my family with my ex-husband who was hispanic and felt very uncomfortable. People stared at us hard everywhere we went. No one said anything but you could actually feel tension in the air. I don't think I will be visiting Picayune, Mississippi in my hijab anytime soon lol. My fiance has seen the news about Chapel Hill and other islamophobic events and he is concerned for our safety. He is afraid most American's hate muslims and thinks we will have a bad life here. I can only reassure him that is not the case here where I live. There are definitely parts of Maryland and Virginia I wouldn't want to go to alone in my hijab but nowhere close to home. If you don't feel comfortable where you live and moving closer to the city is a possibility for you, go for it!

OP, where in Virginia do you live? Definitely there are "pockets" of places all over the country that are worse than others. I reverted to Islam in January and have been wearing Hijab ever since. I was worried that I would be descriminated against but i have not experienced anything more than people being curious about why I am muslim and where i am from. I live in Silver Spring, MD, about 10 mins from DC. This area is very culturally and religiously diverse so for the most part people are very accepting of one another. There is Lutheran church, Mosque, Greek orthodox church, and Buddhist Temple standing right beside each other on the main road I live off of. I drive for Uber and in the beginning I was afraid the riders would be afraid of me or descriminate against me because of my hijab and because of the Islamophobia that exists among some. But I have not had any problems. Most people have been very kind. Many people are curious and aren't sure how to ask about my situation. They will usually start off by asking where I'm from but I can feel they really want to know how it is that I am muslim. I have had some great conversations with many of my riders about how I came to Islam. Mind you, I stay close to the DC metropolitan area when I drive so I am mostly in Northern Virginia, DC, and Montgomery and PG county, MD. A couple of times i have taken riders from DC to places further south in VA away from the city and I haven't felt as comfortable there. One girl was not being mean or anything but she couldn't get over the fact that I am muslim. She kept saying "I just don't get it, you're white...how are you muslim". More rural areas are less diverse and when something is unknown it is often feared. My family is from a tiny town in Mississippi where there is very little cultural or religious diversion. I went to visit my family with my ex-husband who was hispanic and felt very uncomfortable. People stared at us hard everywhere we went. No one said anything but you could actually feel tension in the air. I don't think I will be visiting Picayune, Mississippi in my hijab anytime soon lol. My fiance has seen the news about Chapel Hill and other islamophobic events and he is concerned for our safety. He is afraid most American's hate muslims and thinks we will have a bad life here. I can only reassure him that is not the case here where I live. There are definitely parts of Maryland and Virginia I wouldn't want to go to alone in my hijab but nowhere close to home. If you don't feel comfortable where you live and moving closer to the city is a possibility for you, go for it!

[Smelserjl 137]

Oh boy, I didn't know the topic would blow up like this.

Can we please stay on topic? Anyone else care to share experiences similar to what I had originally asked about concerning their spouse's move to the US and how to deal with it?

[Smelserjl 137]

OP, where in Virginia do you live? Definitely there are "pockets" of places all over the country that are worse than others. I reverted to Islam in January and have been wearing Hijab ever since. I was worried that I would be descriminated against but i have not experienced anything more than people being curious about why I am muslim and where i am from. I live in Silver Spring, MD, about 10 mins from DC. This area is very culturally and religiously diverse so for the most part people are very accepting of one another. There is Lutheran church, Mosque, Greek orthodox church, and Buddhist Temple standing right beside each other on the main road I live off of. I drive for Uber and in the beginning I was afraid the riders would be afraid of me or descriminate against me because of my hijab and because of the Islamophobia that exists among some. But I have not had any problems. Most people have been very kind. Many people are curious and aren't sure how to ask about my situation. They will usually start off by asking where I'm from but I can feel they really want to know how it is that I am muslim. I have had some great conversations with many of my riders about how I came to Islam. Mind you, I stay close to the DC metropolitan area when I drive so I am mostly in Northern Virginia, DC, and Montgomery and PG county, MD. A couple of times i have taken riders from DC to places further south in VA away from the city and I haven't felt as comfortable there. One girl was not being mean or anything but she couldn't get over the fact that I am muslim. She kept saying "I just don't get it, you're white...how are you muslim". More rural areas are less diverse and when something is unknown it is often feared. My family is from a tiny town in Mississippi where there is very little cultural or religious diversion. I went to visit my family with my ex-husband who was hispanic and felt very uncomfortable. People stared at us hard everywhere we went. No one said anything but you could actually feel tension in the air. I don't think I will be visiting Picayune, Mississippi in my hijab anytime soon lol. My fiance has seen the news about Chapel Hill and other islamophobic events and he is concerned for our safety. He is afraid most American's hate muslims and thinks we will have a bad life here. I can only reassure him that is not the case here where I live. There are definitely parts of Maryland and Virginia I wouldn't want to go to alone in my hijab but nowhere close to home. If you don't feel comfortable where you live and moving closer to the city is a possibility for you, go for it!

Hello,

I live closer to West Virginia than to DC (on I-81), but I have certainly heard that Silver Spring and parts of Falls Church and Vienna are as you say. There are more people of Middle Eastern and Central Asia moving deeper into western Northern VA but it's slow and people are getting used to it. I'd like to live closer to DC because of work, but the family is out in this area..