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JJSims

I think my wife is cheating on me.

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Filed: Citizen (apr) Country: Colombia
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Hello, I am very sad at the moment. I have my embassy interview for my visa next week. We, my wife and I have been going together for a year. She met me online and I went to the US to meet with her. We fell in love and got married. I had to come home for work which I did and we filed for spouse visa. Now I think she is seeing someone else. Someone I know and trust who lives in the same area as her has seen her together with another man, they were kissing and not in a friendly way either. She has become cold the last month or so and answers my questions very brief - unlike when we meet. What must I do now? I still want to go to the US and see her, maybe we can work this out. I'm just confuse

Just have your full trust in her...don't entertain doubts or listen to other people,it will only ruin your relationship.

She is your wife, you know her more than we do.

Going there before the interview is a good idea, hope everything works out for the best JJSims.


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Filed: K-1 Visa Country: Philippines
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Nobody here can answer this question for you. It's a big decision that you will need to think hard about and make on your own.

Listen to your heart.

This!

You can always call the embassy to postpone your interview while you sort things out with your wife. It's a huge, life-changing decision.

Hire a private investigator in the US on the quick.

You get rep, You get rep, You get rep....eveyone gets a rep.

Seriously though, you say it's someone you trust. Do they know her also? Maybe the friend can catch something on camera or film for you. It sounds like something may be going on, and if itwere you I would follow through and come, but have a safe way to get back home or make other arrangements in case there is something going on.

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Filed: K-1 Visa Country: Philippines
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You really only have two options... You take the blue pill, the story ends. You wake up in your bed and believe whatever you want to believe. You take the red pill, you stay in wonderland, and I show you how deep the rabbit hole goes. :idea:

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Filed: AOS (apr) Country: Cyprus
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Hire a private investigator in the US on the quick.

:thumbs:

Spoiler

 

I-129F Sent : 3-31-2014, NOA2: 4-6-2014

NVC Received : some dinkelsberry yehoo in the house of clingons send our petition to the wrong consulate.

Consulate Received : July 30,2014 Transfer to right embassy complete.

Interview Date : Oct 22, 2014

Interview Result : AP , requesting another PC (not expired) and certified divorce decree (was submitted)Stokes interview via phone for petitioner 4 hrs after interview.

Oct 23 email notification visa approved.
Visa Received : Nov. 3 , 2014 VISA IN HAND.

US Entry : Nov. 21, 2014

Marriage : Dec 27, 2014

AOS send : May 12, 2015, received May 14, 2015 USPS priority

Email &text : May 18, 2015, check cashed May 19,2015, return receipt May 21, 2015 stamped USCIS Lockbox, NOA1 (3x) May 22,2015

Biometrics : June 1, 2015 letter received for appointment June 8, 2015, successful walk-in June 1, 2015

RFE : June 12, 2015 for income not meeting guideline. Income does ( ! ) exceed guideline.

RFE response : June 26, 2015 returned with a boat load full of financial evidence.

UPDATE: July 5, 2015 updated on all 3 cases, RFE received June 30, 2015.

Service request : Aug 12, 2015, letter received that it will be processed within 90 days from receipt of RFE.

UPDATE: Aug 24, 2015, EAD card being produced/ordered. ( 102 days from AOS receipt day and 55 days from RFE response received.) Thank you Jesus !

Emails : Aug 24, 2015, EAD approved, EAD card ordered.

I-797 EAD/AP approval notice received : Aug 27, 2015

EAD/AP combo card mailed : Aug 27, 2015, EAD/AP combo card received: Aug 31, 2015

Renewal application send for EAD/AP : May 31,2016 (AOS pending over 1 year). Received June 2, 2016,Notice date June7, 2016, emails,texts, NOA1 hard copy

Service request for pending AOS April 21, 2016, case not assigned yet.
Service request for pending AOS June 14, 2016, tier 2 said performing background checks.
Expedite request for EAD/AP Aug 3, 2016, Aug10 notification >request was received, assigned, completed. RFE letter requesting evidence for expedite, docs faxed Aug18

*Service request for I-485 Aug 3, 2016, Aug11 notification> request was assigned. Service request Dec 2, 2016.
AOS Interview letter received Aug 12, 2016

AOS Interview September 21, 2016.

Second Biometrics appointment letters received for EAD and AOS on Aug 15, 2016 for Aug 17 ( 2 day notice).

Second Biometrics completed Aug 17, 2016

Third Biometrics appointment letter received Aug 19, 2016 for Sept. 1, 2016. WTH ?!

EAD/AP (renewal) approval Aug 22, 2016, NOA2 received Aug 25, 2016

Renewal EAD in production notification text and online, expedite successful 4 days after RFE request response was faxed, Aug25mailed,Aug29received.

Sept. 21 Interview, 2 hour interview, we were separated and asked about 50 questions each for an hour each. IO was firm but professional, some smiles.
Several service requests made, contacted Senator and Ombudsman. Background checks still pending.
July 21, 2017 HOME VISIT.  Went well. Topic thread in AOS forum.
Waiting to skip ROC and get 10 yr GC due to over 2 year while pending AOS
AOS APPROVED Oct. 4, 2017 * Green card in hand Oct 13, 2017 !!!!!

First K1 denied after 16 month of AP. Refiled. We are a couple since 2009. Not a sprint but a matter of endurance.

 

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Filed: Other Country: Liechtenstein
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I would tell her the true ..you have a friend that told you this and this

Skype with her and ask her directly to her eyes is the best thing.

Relationship not based in trust are not relation at all. If she say YES im seeing someone you should trust her .

or not Im not seeing someone and you should trust her answer too.

If you dont trust ...better you divorce as quick as you can.

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Filed: K-1 Visa Country: Philippines
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Should be an exciting time for both of you, and she is "cold" toward you, and seen kissing another man.,.,.,.,this does not sound good.

As another poster said, look into your heart, I would go ahead and go to the interview, and if you pass.,,.,.,.,THIS will all come out, because, she will have to tell you she is happy you are coming, or tell you not to come.

How much do you trust this person, who says what they saw? Any reason for them to cause you trouble?

Look at all the angles, do the interview, THEN the truth will come out!

Good luck hope this breaks the right way for you!

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Filed: IR-1/CR-1 Visa Country: Colombia
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I am guessing you don't want to confront her directly as you would not be reaching out if you felt that could be done without causing great strain on the relationship.

There is an indirect route - give your wife an out and see if she takes it.. Tell her you need to skype (or however you communicate) and talk to her about something important. When you talk to her say exactly how you feel with no accusations.. something like "In the past few weeks it feels as if you are not wanting to talk with me and I am wondering if you are having second thoughts on me moving to be with you forever.. I am feeling exposed right now and I need some reassurance from you" .. Her response will then guide what you do next in the conversation. If she is having serious doubts she may still not voice them but you will see her searching for words that are non-committal yet will satisfy you and postpone a painful conversation to a later date.. Long pauses from her means she is trying to work up the nerve to tell you something though more often that not people doing this go back to giving mostly non-committal answers.

Edited by OnMyWayID

I don't believe it.. Prove it to me and I still won't believe it. -Ford Prefect

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Filed: IR-1/CR-1 Visa Country: Armenia
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dont trsust anyone.since your interview is a week from now i think you should just get your visa and go,,once you are there you will find out on your own,and if she really is cheating than you will divorce her ,and go on with your life. -_-

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Filed: Citizen (apr) Country: Ecuador
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One member thread-banned and his post removed, along with two posts quoting the removed material. Avoid nonconstructive preaching.

TBoneTX

VJ Moderation

06-04-2007 = TSC stamps postal return-receipt for I-129f.

06-11-2007 = NOA1 date (unknown to me).

07-20-2007 = Phoned Immigration Officer; got WAC#; where's NOA1?

09-25-2007 = Touch (first-ever).

09-28-2007 = NOA1, 23 days after their 45-day promise to send it (grrrr).

10-20 & 11-14-2007 = Phoned ImmOffs; "still pending."

12-11-2007 = 180 days; file is "between workstations, may be early Jan."; touches 12/11 & 12/12.

12-18-2007 = Call; file is with Division 9 ofcr. (bckgrnd check); e-prompt to shake it; touch.

12-19-2007 = NOA2 by e-mail & web, dated 12-18-07 (187 days; 201 per VJ); in mail 12/24/07.

01-09-2008 = File from USCIS to NVC, 1-4-08; NVC creates file, 1/15/08; to consulate 1/16/08.

01-23-2008 = Consulate gets file; outdated Packet 4 mailed to fiancee 1/27/08; rec'd 3/3/08.

04-29-2008 = Fiancee's 4-min. consular interview, 8:30 a.m.; much evidence brought but not allowed to be presented (consul: "More proof! Second interview! Bring your fiance!").

05-05-2008 = Infuriating $12 call to non-English-speaking consulate appointment-setter.

05-06-2008 = Better $12 call to English-speaker; "joint" interview date 6/30/08 (my selection).

06-30-2008 = Stokes Interrogations w/Ecuadorian (not USC); "wait 2 weeks; we'll mail her."

07-2008 = Daily calls to DOS: "currently processing"; 8/05 = Phoned consulate, got Section Chief; wrote him.

08-07-08 = E-mail from consulate, promising to issue visa "as soon as we get her passport" (on 8/12, per DHL).

08-27-08 = Phoned consulate (they "couldn't find" our file); visa DHL'd 8/28; in hand 9/1; through POE on 10/9 with NO hassles(!).

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Filed: Country:
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wow does sound like a tough situation.

I read a lot of good replies to you..

-Dont trust rumors

-Talk to your spouse face to face via skype and explain what is going on so as to clear it up or discover the truth.

You are already married (a point some posters missed) so you have to sort out the situation as to what is happening and can it be fixed before making any rash decisions.

It is a long journey into the US with family based visas. I am sure some relationships may not weather the time and money mixed with govt red tape.

Don't let anyone here or anywhere else tell you whether you should or shouldn't keep moving forward with your visa.

As one bright VJ already posted that is something you must decide based on the dreams you envisioned with your spouse here in the US.

I have a defination for divorce, it is the day that BOTH people in the marriage quit.

If one seems to have quit or is discouraged the other should in the best possible ways try to remind the other of the reasons why they married.

I can tell you that I had to do that a few times for my fiancee before she recieved her visa which was a very good investment on my part in our relationship.

Good Luck to you

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Do you video chat often? It may seem inappropriate, but I would suggest video chatting with her and confronting her with the information that you have, rather than flying out there. Of course, it might cause upset with whoever gave you said information in the first place, but this is the rest of your life you're talking about. You need to act in self-interest here.

I would stress in the conversation the need for honesty and if she truly wants to be with someone else, then this is her opportunity to do so and save any further pain for the both of you in the long run. You can then file for divorce and find someone that deserves you. It upsets me that you would be treated that way by someone when you're willing to uproot your entire life for that person. Whatever you decide - I really wish you the best of luck.

Now chronicling my experience in handy blog format at


http://the-shipping-forecast.tumblr.com/

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Filed: AOS (pnd) Country: Philippines
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I would go to interview and go to USA. Watch you wife and hire Private Investigator to follow her.

If she is cheating I would file for divorce and try to get half of her assets..

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Filed: IR-1/CR-1 Visa Country: Pakistan
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The person who gave you this information, how well do you know and trust that person? if that person isn't lying then there is no point of going to US and seeing her and no need to work this out. Any men who has some self respect would never tolerate this type of behavior from his wife that she cheats behind his back.

Even if she tells you and says sorry, I would still not want to spend my life with someone who thought of other men behind my back.. leave her and move on..

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Filed: K-1 Visa Country: Brazil
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I would go to interview and go to USA. Watch you wife and hire Private Investigator to follow her.

If she is cheating I would file for divorce and try to get half of her assets..

Divorce is handled by the State Government instead of the Federal Government. Since they have not been living together for the past year, she would claim "no-fault". She would not lose any of her pre-marriage assets and I seriously doubt the judge would consider any post marriage assets as "shared assets" to be divided. He probably ends up paying her legal fees as well as his own. Family Court in the US is very biased against men.

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