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AOS same sex marriage advice??

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Hey Everyone

Im new to the forum but have been on browsing these for about a year or two now. Im currently an international student on an F1 visa and just wanted to ask some questions.

I've been dating a US Citizen now for a little over 8 months (Not a whole lot I know). Here is the deal. We both are genuinely in love with eachother and have recently even moved in together. But whenever the topic comes up its always a little awkward and unsettling for both of us, because we know there is a huge barrier that is standing between us right now, that is me having the right to stay here once I finish studying. We don't want to marry just for the sake of getting immigration benefits ovcourse, and do not want to rush anything , but at the same time it may be our only option. I cant bring him to my home country either as we would just have the same issues. I have entered the DV lottery many times still no luck, My studies end in May next year and then I will only have one year to work on OPT.

Just wanted to know what you advice would be, we want to stay together, but can wait it out until needed. I did not want to file and then have them think we got married just for AOS on my part. How long do cases like this generally take (not sure if it is different for same sex?). If I have two years left here from May, when would the latest be that I can submit so that I would not have to leave the country to do the process abroad?

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You have plenty of time; as long as you file while you are still legally in the USA, there will not be any issues.

So if you are not ready for marriage yet, wait until the end of your OPT and decide then

Same sex petitions are treated no differently.


Bye: Penguin

Me: Irish/ Swiss citizen, and now naturalised US citizen. Husband: USC; twin babies born Feb 08 in Ireland and a daughter in Feb 2010 in Arkansas who are all joint Irish/ USC. Did DCF (IR1) in 6 weeks via the Dublin, Ireland embassy and now living in Arkansas.

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I'm not aos, in cr-1,but I am same sex and no one has ever said a word or treated us differently in this process.


Met in 2010 on a forum for a mutual interest. Became friends.
2011: Realized we needed to evaluate our status as friends when we realized we were talking about raising children together.

2011/2012: Decided we were a couple sometime in, but no possibility of being together due to being same sex couple.

June 26, 2013: DOMA overturned. American married couples ALL have the same federal rights at last! We can be a family!

June-September, 2013: Discussion about being together begins.

November 13, 2013: Meet in person to see if this could work. It's perfect. We plan to elope to Boston, MA.

March 13, 2014 Married!

May 9, 2014: Petition mailed to USCIS

May 12, 2014: NOA1.
October 27, 2014: NOA2. (5 months, 2 weeks, 1 day after NOA1)
October 31, 2014: USCIS ships file to NVC (five days after NOA2) Happy Halloween for us!

November 18, 2014: NVC receives our case (22 days after NOA2)

December 17, 2014: NVC generates case number (50 days after NOA2)

December 19, 2014: Receive AOS bill, DS-261. Submit DS-261 (52 days after NOA2)

December 20, 2014: Pay AOS Fee

January 7, 2015: Receive, pay IV Fee

January 10, 2015: Complete DS-260

January 11, 2015: Send AOS package and Civil Documents
March 23, 2015: Case Complete at NVC. (70 days from when they received docs to CC)

May 6, 2015: Interview at Montréal APPROVED!

May 11, 2015: Visa in hand! One year less one day from NOA1.

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Hey Everyone

Im new to the forum but have been on browsing these for about a year or two now. Im currently an international student on an F1 visa and just wanted to ask some questions.

I've been dating a US Citizen now for a little over 8 months (Not a whole lot I know). Here is the deal. We both are genuinely in love with eachother and have recently even moved in together. But whenever the topic comes up its always a little awkward and unsettling for both of us, because we know there is a huge barrier that is standing between us right now, that is me having the right to stay here once I finish studying. We don't want to marry just for the sake of getting immigration benefits ovcourse, and do not want to rush anything , but at the same time it may be our only option. I cant bring him to my home country either as we would just have the same issues. I have entered the DV lottery many times still no luck, My studies end in May next year and then I will only have one year to work on OPT.

Just wanted to know what you advice would be, we want to stay together, but can wait it out until needed. I did not want to file and then have them think we got married just for AOS on my part. How long do cases like this generally take (not sure if it is different for same sex?). If I have two years left here from May, when would the latest be that I can submit so that I would not have to leave the country to do the process abroad?

Yep, same thing here, we haven't been treated ANY differently and as stressful as this process is sometimes I am secretly happy to be going through the SAME issues as everyone else, feels good to be equal. I'll say to you that you are in a position I WISH I was in when I was in college. I wish I had the option to marry my now wife and start the immigration process at that time but DOMA had not been struck down. This led to us having to be separated after my OPT expired and it led to many years of sadness and frustration until FINALLY we were able to apply for a fiance visa.Now I'm back in the US, we're married and are applying for AOS but it took many years to get here. I envy you! BUT, I will say, as someone already suggested, do not make this decision lightly but take time to finish your education and at least start your OPT before deciding because you don't want to end up marrying someone you're not 100% sure about just to ensure that you can stay here. This process is very expensive and very stressful but if he's the one then it is MORE than worth it...still, you have plenty of time to decide so just think about it and discuss it with your partner.


I'm the Beneficiarydancin5hr.gif

Sept 7th, 2013 = K1 Visa Application Submitted

Sept 18th, 2013 = NOA 1 via e-mail - Case Accepted and Routed to Texas Service Center

Sept 27th 2013= Received NOA1 hard copy

Oct 5th-12th 2013 = Had an AMAZING week together and now back to waiting...ClockWatch2.gif

February 12th 2014 = Five month mark passed. Service request ordered. They said in 27days we should have an answer.

March 15th 2014 = ALIEN REGISTRATION NUMBER CHANGED! FINALLY! dancin5hr.gif

May 31st-June 11th 2014 -Spent a Beautiful week and a half together and got a huge surprise on the day before she left. :D

June 10th 2014 = PETITION APPROVED!!! Hallelujah! :dance:

August 8th 2014 = Medical. Results: Passed

September 23rd 2014= INTERVIEW: APPROVED! so happy!!!!!!!

September 25-28th 2014 = System Error prevents VISA from being issued. :cry:

September 29th 2014= VISA in hand :dancing:

September30th 2014= Entered the USA :thumbs:
December 22nd 2014=MARRIED :)

March 18th 2015 = Filed AOS

April 3rd 2015 = Received NOA1 hard copies

June 20th 2015 = Received EAD/AP card in mail :)

July 28th 2015 = Received Notice of Potential Interview waiver :mellow:

Feb 29th 2016= FINALLY! RECEIVED MY GREENCARD! :dancing:

January 26th, 2018: Filed I-751 Removal of Conditions 

Feb 2nd 2018: Received NOA1

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So am I able to be in opt and let's say have two months left of opt. If I file then can I stay in the country even if it takes longer than what I am authorized for otp? Can you get a work permit then while waiting for AOS?

Also how does it work with regards to state? We live on the border of two states, address is in a state that does not allow same sex marriage, but we were just going to get married in Minnesota. I am presuming it doesn't make a difference because this is dealt with on a federal level and not state?

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Also how does it work with regards to state? We live on the border of two states, address is in a state that does not allow same sex marriage, but we were just going to get married in Minnesota. I am presuming it doesn't make a difference because this is dealt with on a federal level and not state?

You must get married in a State where it is legal. It doesn't matter if you currently live in a State with discrimination.

The SCOTUS is going to review the situation mid year, I expect to see these discriminatory States being forced to comply with equality.

Good luck.

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So am I able to be in opt and let's say have two months left of opt. If I file then can I stay in the country even if it takes longer than what I am authorized for otp? Can you get a work permit then while waiting for AOS?

Also how does it work with regards to state? We live on the border of two states, address is in a state that does not allow same sex marriage, but we were just going to get married in Minnesota. I am presuming it doesn't make a difference because this is dealt with on a federal level and not state?

Hi,

Applying for AOS puts you in an authorize period of stay while the case is being processed. When you OPT runs out, the pending AOS application permits you to legally stay in the US.

You can get an EAD with the AOS. It takes 90 days. If you want to continue working after your OPT expires, you need to have the EAD in your hands. A pending EAD does not authorize you to work. A gap in work authorization means you can not legally work.

Where you get marry is irrelevant. Immigration is federal law. As long as the marriage happens in a state allowing same-sex marriage, then you can apply for AOS based on marriage to a USC. The state of residency has nothing to do with the AOS based on a valid same-sex marriage.

Best of luck.

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Hello Everyone. Thanks all for the great advice. We just got engaged this week and our friends and family are more than happy for us. I just needed some advice as to what to do next. We were only planning to get married in the summer next year, however I fear this may complicate things on my side. I was planning to go home for Christmas in December and he wanted to maybe come with too.

1) If I am leaving the US in December on my F1 and return and get married in July, will they not question this as I was already engaged when I re-entered and entered on a NIV?

2) I was planning to go for OTP and would need to start this around Feb or March, what are the complications with getting on OTP then filing for AOS shortly after ?

3) Would it be ok perhaps to do a civil ceremony beforehand, perhaps in the next 2 or three months just to get it done legally and have it on paper so I can file? I would obviously be staying here for Christmas then but it will just clear up alot of headache for me with waiting and not then having to do OTP etc. My only concern though is I dont want them to question this when we interview because they are going to assume we rushed things just to get the green card. Just wondering if you would recommend this or not.

Thanks for the responses in advance :joy:

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Hello Everyone. Thanks all for the great advice. We just got engaged this week and our friends and family are more than happy for us. I just needed some advice as to what to do next. We were only planning to get married in the summer next year, however I fear this may complicate things on my side. I was planning to go home for Christmas in December and he wanted to maybe come with too.

1) If I am leaving the US in December on my F1 and return and get married in July, will they not question this as I was already engaged when I re-entered and entered on a NIV?

2) I was planning to go for OTP and would need to start this around Feb or March, what are the complications with getting on OTP then filing for AOS shortly after ?

3) Would it be ok perhaps to do a civil ceremony beforehand, perhaps in the next 2 or three months just to get it done legally and have it on paper so I can file? I would obviously be staying here for Christmas then but it will just clear up alot of headache for me with waiting and not then having to do OTP etc. My only concern though is I dont want them to question this when we interview because they are going to assume we rushed things just to get the green card. Just wondering if you would recommend this or not.

Thanks for the responses in advance :joy:

1. You should not enter on F1 visa with pre-conceived intent to stay and file for AOS.

2. I think this should be okay

3. This should be okay.

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