PLEASE HELP. He cheated on me and left me, ive only just arrived in the US!!!!!!!!!!! |
#1
Posted 13 January 2012 - 11:42 AM
My husband petitioned for me, we got married last Feb, and had a great relationship for 2 1/2 years. But on this the last leg of waiting for the green card (for the past month) he has been cheating on me. He confessed to cheating and said that he wanted to do what ever it takes to make it up to me and save our marriage. I arrived in the US 3 days ago, and the first day i was here he was apologising non stop, he loves me and wanted to make it up to me. But two days later, he just left me at the house and ran off with her, he told his friend who lives at the house that he wont come home until im gone!!!
I didn't see this coming at all, everything has been great between us and we loved each other deeply.
So now im at his cousins house who have been great and feel sick to their stomachs since they love me and cant believe hes done this to me. His cousin works in health care and wants me to stay with her and says she can help me find a job etc.
Im so confused, I don't want to just go home to the UK, i need to stay out here for abit and find closure, and i dont want all the money, time and effort that i invested into moving to the US and starting a new life to be for NOTHING. So i would like to stay (at least for a while), where do I stand on this? its not my fault hes done this to me!
Also, the green card will be sent out soon(ive changed the address to his cousins), but how long does it usually take for them to send this out? Ive been here 3 days- and im worried that it will be sent to HIS address. Will the change of address redirect the card to the address I just put down (his cousins). Plus I have now changed the address on the AR 11 form twice since arrival (when i arrived i had to change the address to his current address since NVC hadn't changed it).
Please help!!!
NOA1 date: 05-11-2011
#2
Posted 13 January 2012 - 11:48 AM
(look at my about me page in my profile if you want to see my entire k1 journey)
AOS Journey:
Feb.4, 2011 Mailed AOS packet
Feb. 7, 2011 Pkt delivered in Chicago
Feb. 10, 2011 Received txt and email of NOA for AOS, EAD, and AP
Feb. 11, 2011 Check cashed for AOS
Feb. 12, 2011 Touched
Feb. 14, 2011 received hard copy of NOA for AOS, EAD& AP
Feb. 18, 2011 received appt letter for biometrics
Feb. 28, 2011 biometrics appt @10am
Feb. 28, 2011 received txt/email AOS case transferred to csc
Mar 1, 2011 AOS Touched
Mar 3, 2011 received hard copy of AOS transfer to csc
Mar 4, 2011 AOS Touched
Mar 28, 2011 Received txt/email saying card production has been ordered. (1month 3eeks 3days)
Mar 28, 2011 Received 2nd txt/email saying we have registered this customer permanent residence status
Mar 29, 2011 Received 3rd txt/email says card production has been ordered.
April 1, 2011 greencard and welcome letter in hand!!
April 5, 2011 received txt/email EAD card production ordered
Will Start Removing Conditions Dec 2012!!!!
Dec. 26, 2012 mailed ROC paperwork
Dec. 28, 2012 NOA for ROC paperwork
Jan. 7, 2013 received bio appt letter
Jan. 24, 2013 bio appt.

#3
Posted 13 January 2012 - 11:53 AM
Unbelievable..........but, I'm so sorry for you. I don't know what legal advice...but, please be strong. I'm sure this will be only temporary. As long you married him in good faith, God will still bless you for sure.
#4
Posted 13 January 2012 - 11:54 AM
Edited by utopia2004, 13 January 2012 - 11:55 AM.
NOA1 date: 05-11-2011
#5
Posted 13 January 2012 - 11:56 AM
When he did not even stay with you for a week from time you came into country would sound like a perfect sham for obtaining a GC.
#6
Posted 13 January 2012 - 11:59 AM
#7
Posted 13 January 2012 - 12:00 PM
Hi, i need some serious help here, im so so distraught, confused, hurt, cant eat, sleep anything.
My husband petitioned for me, we got married last Feb, and had a great relationship for 2 1/2 years. But on this the last leg of waiting for the green card (for the past month) he has been cheating on me. He confessed to cheating and said that he wanted to do what ever it takes to make it up to me and save our marriage. I arrived in the US 3 days ago, and the first day i was here he was apologising non stop, he loves me and wanted to make it up to me. But two days later, he just left me at the house and ran off with her, he told his friend who lives at the house that he wont come home until im gone!!!
I didn't see this coming at all, everything has been great between us and we loved each other deeply.
So now im at his cousins house who have been great and feel sick to their stomachs since they love me and cant believe hes done this to me. His cousin works in health care and wants me to stay with her and says she can help me find a job etc.
Im so confused, I don't want to just go home to the UK, i need to stay out here for abit and find closure, and i dont want all the money, time and effort that i invested into moving to the US and starting a new life to be for NOTHING. So i would like to stay (at least for a while), where do I stand on this? its not my fault hes done this to me!
Also, the green card will be sent out soon(ive changed the address to his cousins), but how long does it usually take for them to send this out? Ive been here 3 days- and im worried that it will be sent to HIS address. Will the change of address redirect the card to the address I just put down (his cousins). Plus I have now changed the address on the AR 11 form twice since arrival (when i arrived i had to change the address to his current address since NVC hadn't changed it).
Please help!!!
First off, sorry what happened to you!
If you filed an AR-11 with your current address, then your green card should be sent to you. It can take a few days to a few weeks to receive the green card in the mail. For myself, it was 19 days. You should get a welcome notice soon with a receipt number (just like with the original I-130), so you can track your green card's process online at USCIS.
Also, if/when you divorce, you can file the ROC immediately (after your divorce is final) instead of waiting the usual 2 years. You will then get a 10 year green card upon approval (although you're going to have to prove the marriage was real and not just for a green card). That's if you want to stay in the US. Technically, you have until your current green card (which will be 2 years) to decide if you want to stay in the US or return back to the UK.
Edited by Saylin, 13 January 2012 - 12:01 PM.
My Personal Blog - Journey Through Immigration
IR-1/CR-1 Flowchart
Montreal Consulate Pictures/Maps
Wiki for Canadian Spouses for NVC (electronic processing and online forms)
NVC Processing Times Spreadsheet
Post with Guides, Links, Phone Numbers, and Email Addresses for NVC Process
Post with FAQs for NVC Process
Removing Conditions:
4/30/13 ~ sent ROC application
5/2/13 ~ package delivered at CSC
5/14/13 ~ check cleared bank account (posted date of 5/13)
5/15/13 ~ received NOA (receipt date is 5/2)
5/18/13 ~ biometrics letter received (scheduled for 6/4)
5/21/13 ~ early biometrics walk-in success!
#8
Posted 13 January 2012 - 12:02 PM
Can you get your GC sent to a different address rather than the one it is now going to be sent to?
Are you able to stay in the country?
I don't know the answer to the first question but as far as staying in the country, you have a 2 year GC which will give you the right to reside and work in the United States for that period of time.
Met - Dec 2001
Married in UK - May 15 2008
UK Resident - Apr 2008 to Feb 2012
DCF London
I-130 sent - Jun 17 2011
I-130 approved - Aug 25 2011
Packet 3 received - Sept 7 2011
Interview - Nov 23 2011 IR-1 APPROVED
POE - Feb 2 2012 BOSTON
#9
Posted 13 January 2012 - 12:03 PM
It sounds like what he is doing is not right, and I feel sorry for you for your heartache. But, since you have only been here three days and are not really established here, if you truly came here for him and not for other reasons, now that he has established that he doesn't want you, it doesn't seem like it would be a bad idea to go back home and try to resume what you can of your life without him.
#10
Posted 13 January 2012 - 12:03 PM
TBH i dont know if i want to stay longer than that.. I will prob go home before two years, but i just want to know what my options are. His whole family are on my side and feel sickened by what hes done. Im staying with them right now. I feel so sick, i honestly never thought he could do this to me.
NOA1 date: 05-11-2011
#11
Posted 13 January 2012 - 12:06 PM
Hi, i need some serious help here, im so so distraught, confused, hurt, cant eat, sleep anything.
My husband petitioned for me, we got married last Feb, and had a great relationship for 2 1/2 years. But on this the last leg of waiting for the green card (for the past month) he has been cheating on me. He confessed to cheating and said that he wanted to do what ever it takes to make it up to me and save our marriage. I arrived in the US 3 days ago, and the first day i was here he was apologising non stop, he loves me and wanted to make it up to me. But two days later, he just left me at the house and ran off with her, he told his friend who lives at the house that he wont come home until im gone!!!
I didn't see this coming at all, everything has been great between us and we loved each other deeply.
So now im at his cousins house who have been great and feel sick to their stomachs since they love me and cant believe hes done this to me. His cousin works in health care and wants me to stay with her and says she can help me find a job etc.
Im so confused, I don't want to just go home to the UK, i need to stay out here for abit and find closure, and i dont want all the money, time and effort that i invested into moving to the US and starting a new life to be for NOTHING. So i would like to stay (at least for a while), where do I stand on this? its not my fault hes done this to me!
Also, the green card will be sent out soon(ive changed the address to his cousins), but how long does it usually take for them to send this out? Ive been here 3 days- and im worried that it will be sent to HIS address. Will the change of address redirect the card to the address I just put down (his cousins). Plus I have now changed the address on the AR 11 form twice since arrival (when i arrived i had to change the address to his current address since NVC hadn't changed it).
Please help!!!
Wow! It's usally the other way around in these type of situations...well you do have a conditional green card for 2 years but i'm not sure how it works; if he decided to divorce then it will get canceled (I think)... I say stay as long as you can and see what happens if he wants a divorce let him initiate it and give his own reasons for it; Divorce takes usally a long time between 5 months to 1year. It's not that easy. For now stay its ur chance to be here. It's good his family is willing to help you. Plus if you both decided to divorce it's a lot easier to do it here while you both are together,if you leave how will you divorce? it will be very difficult for you to adjust your status in England. you will need paper from usa showing you are legally divorced.
Edited by habibi83, 13 January 2012 - 12:13 PM.
#12
Posted 13 January 2012 - 12:16 PM
I have tons of evidence of a bonafide marriage know. Tons of phone records, his family and my family know that our marriage was real, MY FAMILY flew out to the US and PAID for our wedding!!!! they have receipts of this. We had a lease at our old apartment. Hundreds of pictures, all massive wedding album of wedding photos.
TBH i dont know if i want to stay longer than that.. I will prob go home before two years, but i just want to know what my options are. His whole family are on my side and feel sickened by what hes done. Im staying with them right now. I feel so sick, i honestly never thought he could do this to me.
Listen, situations get messed up all the time. I understand your wanting to stay for a little while, maybe the marriage can be salvaged. Also, it seems like you have become part of his family so you would like closure or whatnot with them. It's early days. I'm very sorry you're going through this x
Met - Dec 2001
Married in UK - May 15 2008
UK Resident - Apr 2008 to Feb 2012
DCF London
I-130 sent - Jun 17 2011
I-130 approved - Aug 25 2011
Packet 3 received - Sept 7 2011
Interview - Nov 23 2011 IR-1 APPROVED
POE - Feb 2 2012 BOSTON
#13
Posted 13 January 2012 - 12:18 PM
If you think you have enough evidence then you are ok, as of now you have 2 years and you can make a call to live in US or return back home or you guys can get togeather and make it work.I have tons of evidence of a bonafide marriage know. Tons of phone records, his family and my family know that our marriage was real, MY FAMILY flew out to the US and PAID for our wedding!!!! they have receipts of this. We had a lease at our old apartment. Hundreds of pictures, all massive wedding album of wedding photos.
TBH i dont know if i want to stay longer than that.. I will prob go home before two years, but i just want to know what my options are. His whole family are on my side and feel sickened by what hes done. Im staying with them right now. I feel so sick, i honestly never thought he could do this to me.
#14
Posted 13 January 2012 - 12:18 PM
Edited by utopia2004, 13 January 2012 - 12:19 PM.
NOA1 date: 05-11-2011
#15
Posted 13 January 2012 - 12:30 PM
Good luck and have faith.
Liz.
Hi, i need some serious help here, im so so distraught, confused, hurt, cant eat, sleep anything.
My husband petitioned for me, we got married last Feb, and had a great relationship for 2 1/2 years. But on this the last leg of waiting for the green card (for the past month) he has been cheating on me. He confessed to cheating and said that he wanted to do what ever it takes to make it up to me and save our marriage. I arrived in the US 3 days ago, and the first day i was here he was apologising non stop, he loves me and wanted to make it up to me. But two days later, he just left me at the house and ran off with her, he told his friend who lives at the house that he wont come home until im gone!!!
I didn't see this coming at all, everything has been great between us and we loved each other deeply.
So now im at his cousins house who have been great and feel sick to their stomachs since they love me and cant believe hes done this to me. His cousin works in health care and wants me to stay with her and says she can help me find a job etc.
Im so confused, I don't want to just go home to the UK, i need to stay out here for abit and find closure, and i dont want all the money, time and effort that i invested into moving to the US and starting a new life to be for NOTHING. So i would like to stay (at least for a while), where do I stand on this? its not my fault hes done this to me!
Also, the green card will be sent out soon(ive changed the address to his cousins), but how long does it usually take for them to send this out? Ive been here 3 days- and im worried that it will be sent to HIS address. Will the change of address redirect the card to the address I just put down (his cousins). Plus I have now changed the address on the AR 11 form twice since arrival (when i arrived i had to change the address to his current address since NVC hadn't changed it).
Please help!!!
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