just curious. its a stressful time all around!

I've pretty much stayed the same. But he's not here yet

I gained some weight during the visa process but I gained more after I moved to the US

I lost weight before coming here and gained after being here while waiting for my EAD at home 24/7.

Fast closing in a weight loss of 30 pounds, went from a snug 32 inch waist to a comfortable 30, for just under 160lbs to slightly over 130lbs. I'm at the point that I need to make sure I have a l ot of change in my pockets on windy days.

I stayed basically the same throughout the visa process, same with the husband. I have gained a bit since he's gotten here, so has he. I'm trying to lose what I've gained. Husband is happy with his weight gain. He's gone from a size 30/31 to a 33/34. I think he looks great! He was a bit too thin when he arrived.

Don't get me started on this topic. It could get ugly. I have never understood people that let themselves go after they get married. This pertains to men and women. "No need to look good any more, I'm off the market." Craziness!

I lost about 15 while going through the process and gain 5 back when he got here

I don't think this is always the case. I, for one, didn't decide to let myself go. My weight gain (not an enormous amount, maybe 15 lbs) is mostly due to cooking more (and eating more) and not finding time for the gym. My husband was waiting on his EAD for 4 months so instead of hitting the gym after work I went home. Now that he's working in the evening I have time to get back to the gym.

I lost about 10-15lbs. during the process. I gained it back.

Andre gained after. Nothing during.

I'm not the USC, which this poll seem aimed at, but I would vote YES on both gaining and losing since coming here. Twice actually. Pregnancies tend to make you do that.
Other than that I tend to be stuck at my normal weight no matter what, and I don't intend to change that =).
Hubby has gained 8 pounds since we got married, I wish I could say that it's because of my fabulous cooking, but I can't with a straight face...
They say it's a sign of a happy marriage

don't get me started

i haven't let myself go.. it just happened... we eat out a lot more down here then I ever did back in Canada..

and I am not a pig when I eat either.... food just likes to stick to me... but not when I am pregnant for some reason.. then I can't gain weight to save my life

but letting yourself go means not watching what you eat, whether it's takeout or not....

I've lost since I've been here, probably because I'm eating healthier, and enjoying cooking healthy for two now instead of one.

Don't get you started?? Started on what? Being disrespectful? I'm a large lady, have been for years. This is how my husband fell in love with me. This is how I fell in love with him. Give me a break. How old are you? What a disturbing and disgusting statement you just made. What a shallow man.

Carla

Not necessarily. In Andre's case, part of it was he could not afford to eat some of the time. Eating 2 or 3 times a day makes a difference.

uh oh, another popcorn thread

NO! NO popcorn, it's not allowed. Popcorn is banned!

it is? can we have doritos instead?

stop talking about Doritos in front of this pregnant woman

I, the female USC, gained weight during the visa process - when hubby was still in Brazil. I was sad and lonely for months...
He, on the other hand, lost a lot of weight over the months that we were apart. His sadness and loneliness leads to weight loss - where mine leads to weight gain.

When he moved here he started to gain A LOT of weight since he was waiting for his EAD and spending too much time at home. He also started eating American food like Doritos and other not-so-good for you foods.
Once he got his job he lost the extra weight by watching what he eats and hitting the gym. He's always had a great body...
I'm losing my weight now because I'm doing capoeira on a weekly basis - the gym didn't do much for me.

capoeira is a wonderful exercise

Oh, go on then.

When I first arrived in the States, I gained weight too quickly. The first 3 months were the hardest. I stayed home and was too scared to go out. But later I turned to biking, boating (rowing and pedaling) & running (for at least 30 minutes to an hour) & sometimes tennis. I sifted out the bad stuff and empty calories from the green good stuff. But these frequent potlucks at work is giving me the hard time. The good thing is the company I work for is covering our gym memberships and fitness expenses.

I gained about 10-12 lbs IIRC, but I had also moved back to the U.S. from Italy at that time. I think the weight gain was a combination of the stress of the visa process, my switch back to driving a car rather than walking everywhere, and a change in diet. It took me about 6 months after he arrived for me to lose it again.

Average weight gain after marriage for women in the first two years of marriage is something like nine pounds, most of it attributable to those who get pregnant. Plus, a lot of women drop weight right before the wedding, so asking 'before & after' weight isn't a really good predictor of their attitudes. A lot of my male friends put on 10-20 pounds after marriage just because they were making the effort to eat normal dinners.

Anyhow, any vows that include 'in sickness and in health' should preclude expecting the other person to put on a show all the time, whether it's the man demanding his wife stay a size 2 or the woman demanding that every day be an exciting date where he gives her flowers. People are going to get old, puke, lose their hair, etc.

I've stayed pretty much the same weight through the whole process. I'm maybe three pounds heavier since the wedding, but that's coincided with some weighttraining, so chances are it's mostly water weight (judging by past experience.) I have a pretty stable setpoint.

Lost weight, 8 to 10 pounds and I would say the same for my fiance. I doubt if most people choose to let themselves go just because they are married. Being able to eat dinner together can do a lot for the appetite..

I've gained close to 20 pounds in the last 18 months, but I also quit smoking too. I have been working out more, so I could claim it's muscle, but it's probably just because I've been eating more Plus, when P and I are together we go for long walks all the time. Now that school has started again it's gogogo with soccer/basketball/choir/drama and I've been putting myself last.

I wouldn't say that we "let ourselves go" (even though we aren't married yet) but I will say that I am happy that I have someone who loves me for who I am, and who I love for who he is. Doesn't mean I'm going to stop trying to be healthy, but honestly, that's not just for him. It's for ME and my kids, which is a much healthier than doing it solely for someone else, I think.

If people do gain weight after marriage, I would suggest that (if not due to pregnancy as Caladan mentioned) it's less due to "letting yourself go" and maybe due to how hard the first year of marriage is supposed to be; a lot of women respond to stress by gaining weight. During this process I've weighed the lowest of my adult life and the highest.

The first year is supposed to be the easiest, not the hardest -- if it's so damn hard, why even bother getting married?

It's supposed to be the hardest because theoretically you have to adjust to living together, sharing finances, etc. We didn't have those problems because we had already lived together so for us the first year (not quite done yet) has been pretty smooth sailing.

I lost a good 15 pounds between the time we filed and the time we got married. Ive gained it all back when I hit my 2nd trimester though.

Have you gained/lost weight while waiting for your SO to arrive? Yes, I stay same weight while waiting for the visa. and when I arrived in US..my hubby gained weight and I lose weight (I have trouble with foods)

My hubby stayed the same weight waiting for me to arrive. I've lost 45 lbs since i got here.

I gained weight

i went from 100 to 118 .. during my aos processing time

oh man!! i gained about 20 pounds!! i was deeeeepressed when i got back and my diet only consisted of ice cream and chocolate...but when we were together i was losing weight..... =( i wanna lose these extra pounds before we're together again!! i guess that's the only thing this long wait is good for...haha....i guess i have a lot of time to get back to the gym.....

Gained 27 lbs since returning from Thailand last February. Damn American food is so full of crap. Can't wait till my SO gets here so I can get some real good healthy Thai food again!!

During the process, I lost 30 pounds, but I attribute that to working 2 jobs and eating one meal a day, and constantly being sick.

He lost like 6. lol

Right before the wedding I was like terrified of gaining weight. haha

He's been here for a month today, and he's lost more weight...

...and I have too.

I've gained 12 pounds since he arrived the 3rd week in September. I don't know what in the heck my problem is. I don't feel like I'm eating more although I have been more tied down to my desk at work than I was before. I'm still in my first trimester, I hope I'm not a cow before I go into delivery.
I wish my husband were the type to tell me that I need to exercise, maybe that would get me motivated to get my behind moving, or either send me into fits of crying and hysteria... These darn hormones.....

I gained and lost ........gained and lost ......right along with this roller coaster visa journey for the past 2 years.

My fiance stresses out and won't eat at times and I have to force feed him over the phone.
During non stressful times he eats once or twice a day, roughing it in Sierra Leone.
A chicken is a feast. Bread and rice the usual,sometimes greens, an egg for a treat. No sweets.He lost his job so that doesn't help the food supply.
There is no fridge to search for snacks either. No pantry to roam for a midnight snack. Ever.
Poor Baby, I am sure he will put on 20 pounds when he finally gets here. Our first grocery shopping trip will be fun.
We will both join a gym to stay fit though.

* runs for the pumkin pie *

Are you kidding, when I walk outside people think we are having a solar eclipse

Same for Neil...now he eats 3 times a day and he isn't walking everywhere and he's gained about 25lbs since he came here

during my process I was so stressed that I lost about 15 pounds. Even before I met Ranti I was on my diet and lost 100 pounds. Thank God I kept it off. I wont to loose about another 20 pounds.

I don't think it can be attributed to "letting yourself go" at all. The majority of people here who have come over from other countries have encountered a HUGE lifestyle change. First of all it is really hard to find food here that is low in salt, sugar (including HFCS) and just generally healthy for you. Even the bread has sugar in it (which it doesn't in the UK, for example) so the change in diet (even if you are really careful) can take its toll on the body for many.

Then there is lifestyle change. The USA is huge and also really reliant on its cars. This removes walking from the equation which I know that many beneficiaries probably did a lot of in their own countries. This can have a major effect on weight too so I think these things are something to be considered rather than the "letting themselves go" option.