Hi everyone....Hope all are having a great day...plan to enjoy the weather...my boys are having a play date with my brother and sister-in-law today they are so excited and then taking my son to the new Ratitouille (SP?) movie tonight, he is so so excited....

Have a great day everyone...
Melinda

Happy Saturday!!!

morning everyone! it's been so long since i posted. my daughter came home yesterday so maybe i will see more normalcy in my life. this weekend is our tax free weekend so we are up and ready to go shopping. btw, i HATE shopping. hope everyone had a great day!!!!!

My son is going to be starting his first day of preschool academy a week from Monday.

The school is having an open house this morning and I'm taking him with some of my family members to see the place so he won't be so "out of sorts" the first day...I hope. Going to take some video for hubby so he can see as well and share in the day.

Guess the rest of the day will be doing yard work and getting groceries. YUCK!!!!!!

Melinda let me know how the kids enjoy the movie. I am taking my kids to see the same one on my daughter's birthday so let me know if the movie is fun! Not much going on here today its raining so looks as if i will be inside for most of the day! Everyone have a great weekend




AJ1

Moroccan FEstival in Houston today....mmmmm....couscous.....



I saw Hairspray yesterday. I am still unsure how I feel about it. It is a more white washed version of the original film for sure, but still quuite entertaining. I love musicals and movies with dancing. I have mixed feelings about John Travolta. anyone see it?

AJ - Sending you some of our sunshine your way!!!!!

I haven't but my oldest daughter saw it last week and the funny thing is that the original was on the Family Channel the next day. She said the two were VERY different but I'm glad she got to see both so quickly so she could compare.





Not much going on today. More sleeping, resting and ringing the bell to have the kids bring me stuff. (they're loving that). I feel bad 'cause this weekend will really suck for them but I can't risk not being able to go to work on Monday since it's month end. Just from going to the camp to get my little one yesterday I was totally wiped out. I might just go back to work part time next week but we'll see how that flies with my boss. She is the one who has cancer and goes to radiation treatments every single day and has NEVER missed a day or even an hour of work due to it so I feel like a total pansy even taking these past few days off during such a critical time of the month at work. My sister told me to just think of myself but I tend to feed into the whole guilt thing. My mom taught me well.

I hope someone goes to the mall and does lots of fun shopping followed by some junk food at the food court for me, or better yet go to the beach and sit and read a good book while their kids ride their boogie boards. Can someone do this for me please? So I can live vicariously through them?

Allousa - oh you poor thing...I remember that first day of preschool so well. You'll get through it. Just pamper yourself and take LOTS of pictures for both you and hubby since they just grow up so fast once they start school! Seems like yesterday my little one started kindergarden and now she's going to graduate grammar school this year!

Well in about 30 min's i will be getting ready for work. Noon till 10 pm. And I dont feel to go to work After work I will head out to the campgrond and try to put a new refridgartor in my camper.

I am spending a quiet Saturday with my SO who is cooking at the moment for his father while his mother in on vacation at the sea with other family. Hmmm, he learned how to cook???? Fried chicken, pasta with tomato sauce and salad....imagine MY shock. (He takes out trash and cleans too!!! THANK YOU MOM!!!) Other than that Im printing the first pages of each of our chats since December to show on going relationship for interview....and sitting with my mom (she has alzheimers) Just a quiet day with lots of sun and relaxing. Hope everyone here has a great weekend.

last week, a friend of mine and I saw haispray. both of us thought it was fun , we had a good time. . I haven t seen the original movie, but few people had told me that it is no where as good as the original version. I am planning on renting it the old movie and watching just to find out for my self.

Good Morning everyone! I couldn't sleep at all last night. Could it be the HUGE iced mocha I had at 8:00?

We're going out later to get school supplies and school clothes. I can see the money flying out of my bank account already! I never knew a 7 year old could be sooooo into fashion.

Have a great day everyone!

I took my kids to see it the weekend before last. I thought it was really good and it held the kids attention throughout the movie...

Good luck w/your son's first day of preschool academy..my son started a new preschool and starts Kindergarden in September time goes by so fast.....anywho...take care. melinda




I will sure let you know - I heard it was funny....have a great great day - - -




Oh great to here, thanks for sharing I definately need something to hold attention spans...

WoooHooo!!!! Survived the mall and back to school shopping. Only thing I missed was a cinammon and sugar pretzel. As a result I will make funnel cakes tonight. My daughter saw that movie and she loved it. Think tomorrow may be a lake day after curch.


Doodle - will my funnel cakes be sufficient? Then the lake tomorrow?

only if there is a TON of powdered sugar on top of that funnel cake...then MAYBE i'll forgive the fact that you didn't have that pretzel.

We were supposed to go school supply shopping this weekend 'cause my work gave me a discount coupon for Staples that was only good through the end of this weekend. Oh well.

I refuse to go school clothes shopping until the school year is a few weeks underway. Only by then have they surveyed the other girls' wardrobes and know what they want. Many a year have I stocked up only to have them beg me for this or that a few weeks into the year. The one thing I dread is getting those North Face jackets. they do last them through the whole year so we get our money's worth but omg those things are expensive.

Not a lot today, just got back from lunch with my grandparents. About to head to the basement to continue cleaning it out so we can remodel it and my fiance and I can live down there

It might not be done by the time he gets here....but I'll put him to work. And if he doesn't know how to put up drywall, he will by the time he's done

That the original plays on the family chanel just tickles me- it's really a rather "subversive" film

thats a really good idea, I always do this to. we buy one or two outfits before school and then going shopping a few weeks in. your feeling better today?

Happy Saturday !

Ok, so my boss said yesterday, we have a meeting with a builder. I have a suprise for you. I get to the address, and there sits a model house, complete, ready for flooring. Behind this house, is a HUGE field. This builder is putting 100 houses in this field. It is a whole neighborhood,,,,,and guess who gets to floor the entire project??? At 10% commission on all of it??? ME! Is that the most awesome thing ever?????


Hope you all have a great weekend.

Jackie

hey girls (and charles) it is probably about time for me to say goodbye and leave VJ,,so let's chat soon so I can tell you each bye personally and wish you luck in your journeys.

but i don't want you to leave don't make me start a poll to get you to stay

No kidding. I was like, hon what channel is this, and she showed me that it was the family channel!




Thing is that the weather is usually so hot the first week or two that they can still really wear their summer clothes. Doesn't normally start to get chilly here until around mid-September and school starts on Sep 5 this year for us. But of course now that I said that we'll have a massive cold front come in. lol. I hope not if the price of oil stays high.




ok i've never sworn at you but wtf?!?!?!?!?!?!?!

I mean if it's too painful for you that's one thing but most of us still consider you as family and lord knows you have a heck of a lot of visa info (amoung other things) to offer.

I'll put up quite a stink if you go!

Jackie,

Why on earth do u need to say good bye? We love u here and need u. U keep us going. No need to leave. Please don't go.

I feel like a hot piece of poop today. I was supposed to be studying all day for my next exam, but I haven't done a damn thing. I don't know if it's the heat or what, but yawn, I think I'll take a nap now...

If you leave me now, youll take away the biggest part of me
No baby please dont go
If you leave me now, youll take away the very heart of me
No baby please dont go

A love like ours is love thats hard to find
How could we let it slip away
Weve come too far to leave it all behind
How could we end it all this way
When tomorrow comes well both regret
Things we said today

A love like ours is love thats hard to find
How could we let it slip away
Weve come too far to leave it all behind
How could we end it all this way
When tomorrow comes well both regret
Things we said today

If you leave me now, youll take away the biggest part of me
No baby please dont go
Oh girl, just got to have you by my side

No baby, please dont go

Oh mama, I just got to have your lovin, yeah

Weve come too far to leave it all behind




It's hot as heck outside. Even the cat is droopy.

oh doodle, you are something else....I love ya girl.

I think I am depressed. I don't think to eat, or change my clothes, when driving I often say 'wow how did I get here?' I am not coping with this very well. I have not heard my husbands voice for ....3 weeks tommorrow. No fights, no arguements, nothing. Just poof and he's gone. I feel like he died and there was not even a funeral. The person that layed next to me for 3 years is gone. How do you go to bed with that thought? You don't, you sit on the couch and stare at the bedroom door. Man, I did not mean to unleash all this negativity. See, that is why I shouldn't be here.

I promise to check in on you all from time to time. I care. I just can't be cheery and upbeat now.

Jackie

Wishing you the best Jackie, with whatever life brings you.

Congratulations on the floor job! I guess you'll be busy for some time.

And don't feel that you need to be cheery when you're here. Take a look around, everyone has their moments/days when they are upset or need to vent or whatever.
You are always welcome here, whatever the mood.

Well we came back from the movie kids loved it - it was cute and funny and it held their attention, thank goodness....hope everyone is having a great day...

Oh yeah sure..now that you hit the big bucks, you are moving up town and leaving us???????

See you off line soon Jackie!

Depression sounds about right. I think you should go for a while- you know- everyday here is a reminder and it is so easy to just stay in front of the computer- not eating, not sleeping (speaking from personal experience here ) ...a few days, a couple of weeks...it could do you good. I remember taking a break from VJ during the visa proccess when we hit a really hard part...it really makes a difference.

But we are going to save your spot and keep your chair warm

Don't be a stranger, Jackie. Take some time off (of VJ) and take care of yourself but come back and visit now and then, ok?

I've done absolutely nothing today. I don't know if I'm coming down with something but I feel exhausted. Now I'm just waiting for the pizza delivery guy. Yumm!

Have a great rest of the day y'all.

Well Jackie whatever you decide, I hope I still see you on yahoo now and then. And btw if we have to be cheery in order to be here then I guess I should leave too since I'm not always so chipper either. If you feel depressed for more than a month or so though please see a doctor since left untreated it can really mess up your life...and although your husband is gone it seems like the rest of your life is picking up....work seems to be going well for you, you have a beautiful granddaughter, etc. So many wonderful things to be grateful though I know it's hard to see all that through the tears right now. I almost think there should be a support group for vj'ers whose spouses ended up flat out deserting them.

Anyhoo on another chapter I am about to disown my parents, for real. Many of you know how ridiculous they are and logically my mind has said to just eliminate them from my life but my kids keep dragging me back to them. I feel though that it's time to make the break. There is not one day that goes by that I don't get insulted by them whether it be regarding my husband, the way my house is, the way I raise my kids, etc. I'm usually thick skinned but I guess the pneumonia has opened my eyes to the fact that they just love using me as a punching bag lately. I mean to drop off medicine, which I am grateful for, to a daughter who is clearly a hurting pup and then to b!tch her out about how messy her house is, even though she JUST came back from a trip abroad (the mess was my laundry strewn all over my room) is just ridiculous. I could go on and on but I'm really just kind of posting this so it will ring home to myself that this is the right decision. It sucks. It really does and I'm hurting over it but I'm sick of being verbally abused over and over and over again. My sister yelled at them the other day for it too and she won't even talk to them anymore. Anyways I'm done. They're 75 and 77 and I'm done. I don't know how I'll handle the kids asking about them but it's not worth my feeling like a piece of doggy doo every freaking day of my life to keep in contact with them.

Ok that's my story for today. I'm sure I've bored every last one of you but I had to get that off my chest.

doodlebug - i think you need to do what is right for you and it certainly sounds like you have given this a great deal of thought and consideration...under the stress that u r (away from ur SO, raising children, diagnosed w/pneumonia) u could certainly benefit from being surrounded with supportive people...hang in there and i hope you are feeling better...get plenty of rest....and do something for you - to relax....-melinda

Doodle,
Have you had a heart to heart talk with your parents about all of this? My parents were doing exactly the same thing a few years ago and I let my anger build and build till finally one day I went off on them. I had never did anything like that even during my rebelious teenage years! I let them know exactly how I felt.....that I was an adult, I had a good head on my shoulders and they needed to respect that. I told them they did not have to live in my house, with my kids or with my future husband and they could either respect that.....keep their mouth shut or just not come around me and say anything. That actually did it and I haven't had a problem with them in almost 2 years now. I hope you can get things worked out though.

Hope everyone is having a nice day.....

This whole waiting for the visa thing is really taking a toll on me......it stinks big time.......I feel as though I can't make major decisions that would impact my SO because I don't know when they'll get their act together and start issuing visas..........job opportunity decisions......apartment opportunity decisions......graduate study opportunities.......etc.
It's tough for me to see how all of my family & friends' lives seem to be moving forward and when I look at my life it's as though it's at a standstill.......it's not moving......

And I know that adjustments after the visa are difficult and that this part might seem like the easy part.....but I really want to move on out of this AP he$$ to settle down and live a normal life.........

Doodle.....have you sincerely explained to your parents how their hurtful comments make you feel? Do they truly understand the consequences of what they're saying? Sometimes people say mean things......especially to the ones they unconditionally love the most......without realizing the impact their words have made........people take other people for granted.....especially their own family members.

Doodle and Jackie, I hope both of you are in better spirits soon. On or off VJ, doesn't matter!

I hear ya. I never understood when people would say this is the hard part. I mean biting my nails waiting to see if we'd get the NOA2 was hard. Waiting impatiently to get all the papers together for the packet 3 was hard. Experiencing an interview with a guy that just looks like he hates you was hard................but having your future put on hold till lord knows when is just a killer.............especially for someone who likes to plan things, you know?

Obviously I haven't even had to go through this for even more than a week yet so I can't even imagine the pain you are going through. All I can say is to look to those who have been there and got through it. Look at those with similar timelines and see how they all say that it's all worth it. That is what keeps me going now. The thought that once he's here this will all be a distant, yet hellish, memory.

I know that once all the "to do"s are done I'll just be a basketcase pacing back and forth foaming at the mouth. For now though I have so many todos. Do you have things like that you can focus on or is this old info and I should just shut up. lol. I know I hate hearing things I already know over and over and over again but sometimes it helps. You never know. Hang in there!

Doodle, if you felt as though you have tried to reason (haha, right) with your parents and you are still getting no where, then IMO you have to keep yourself from toxic relationships.

I say this because I haven't spoken to my mother since last October. She has always hated my father and when he died, she didn't even come to the funeral! Not even for me! She did come a week later and ended up saying some really mean stuff about my dad and didn't support me in my grief at all. She and I have had a HORRIBLE relationship all our lives (she left me when I was 2 and didn't raise me) and this incident was the straw that broke the camels back. I really let her have it and I told her how self-centered she was and that her behavior was unacceptable. Must have hit a nerve because we haven't talked since.

I tell you this because I have learned (after much therapy) that I can never expect for her to give me what she doesn't have to give. But at the same time, I don't have to accept a relationship that is toxic to my life and that of my son. Having grandchildren in the mix is tricky, but my concern would be how are they learning to cope with future relationships that are toxic as well.

Being a single mom is tough. Being a single, WORKING mom is tougher. Being a single, working mom going through this immigration CRAP....well...can we say that we're having the difficulty buffett??????? You have to do what is best for you and your children emotionally. Perhaps in time, your parents will see that you stand your ground and refuse to be treated badly. I don't find this being disrespectful to your parents, because if they were treating you with true love, they would be concerned for your feelings.

I feel for you, I really do. I used to cry tears over the loss of a relationship with my mother, but it's wasted energy on something that will never change.

Be strong and know that I'm here if you want to talk.

Jackie, I agree with everyone else. You don't need to leave. Why do you feel you have to go?

I'm sorry that you are having to go through all of this. I know many of us here wish we could just wave a magic wand and make it all go away.

But, then again, if one of us had a magic wand, we'd probably be beating the he-ll out of each other to get it and bring our hubbies home!!!!!! I know I wouldn't do THAT!!!!!

Not to get all therapy on a public message board but it's 11:25 and I can't sleep since I do nothing all day but lie around waiting for the stuff to get out of my lungs. lol

Anyways, this has been an ongoing battle. Truthfully were it not for my children I would have moved far far away as soon as I got divorced. I know distance doesn't always solve everything but in my case it would have solved 90 percent of my problems.

Anyways I won't get into the nitty gritty of it all but toxic is an understatement and this immigration stuff is only the tip of the iceberg....stuff has been going on for years but because of the grandkids I've sucked it up so that they can have a somewhat healthy, yet totally supervised by me vehemently, relationship with their grandparents.

They've crossed the line though these past few days and I'm done. I actually don't feel sad about it. I'm the last person in the family to do this too. There are four of us and I'm the baby so I guess it was bound to happen. Sad to think that not one of their children wants to be around them....may that never happen to me please God.


So I wonder what the effects of tylenol pm would be coupled with robitussin with codeine. lol. I seriously cannot sleep and am just laying here trying to drift off to no avail, but I'm scared to mix the meds. I've always had insomnia but I usually just take the tylenol pm and I'm out.

*sigh*