Hi All,

Since we are all in the waiting game, I thought I'd start a thread on interesting things we have done...or do to pass the time till our loved ones can be with us. I thought we could include things we've done for our SO's or things at home we do to just simply pass the time waiting on visas. I personally write my SO every few days and once a month send him a "care package" with homebaked goods (they actually survived well), cards and things that smell like me. I also take pictures of the area I live in and send them to him and his parents, so they can SEE where he will be living before he comes. I find that it helps make him a part of my day. I take pictures of my home, my neighborhood, when I go shopping of the stores, the roads, the lakes, scenes from the area. I live in a historical area so it makes it interesting to take a pic of something with history then write a bit about it to send him.

What have others done to pass time? Or what ideas do you have that can help us bridge the gap??


Salam Alaikum

Faith

What a cool thread!
Okay, I have read everything I can find about being a muslims wife.
I have read about the culture, and the country as a whole.
I have read and read about the visa process.
I have taken pictures of the area I live in.
I have "warned" him about the differences betweed here and his country.
I have taken pictures of my sons and sent to him and his family.

I've read so much my eyes need bifocals now!!! LOL. I have loved learning about Islam and the culture. I've planned a trip in the end of August, so that helps to. Im in the process of thinking of new things to do to keep our bond strong and interesting.

Basically cleaning. lol.

I have so much clutter it's not even funny. I tackled under my bed this past week. Now it's on to the closet. Hopefully by the time he gets here my home will be clutter free!

Scrapbooking and card making while working a full-time and a part-time job. I had to channel my energies elsewhere.

A few weeks after I left, he and his brother split the costs on a computer, web cam, and internet service at their house! I'm sure the cyber owner wasn't too happy about losing his best customer, but that gave us the chance to chat for about 3-4 hours a day during the week, and about 6 hours a day on the weekend. So, that's pretty much all we both did while waiting!

I don't remember doing anything different in particular. Although we were lucky to only be separated for about 5 months. He was not very internet savvy at that point, so we didn't chat or anything like that.

I was able to catch up on a lot of American TV and movies that I had missed though after being out of the country for 3 years. That was crucial for me.

I organized the whole house, threw away the clutter, gave away stuff the whole 9 yards. (yet I find myself still doing it today ). I repainted the living room, dining room an kitchen. And spent A LOT of time here on VJ...A lot may be an understatement

I didn't really do anything different either. We spoke daily on the phone and occasionally online.

For those of you who are still waiting, I know how rough it is but believe me when I say as soon as your SO gets here the bad memories of waiting will fade quickly. Moh and I will talk about how it doesn't seem like it took that long once everything was said and done.

We talk alot online to. Since he now has DSL at home he stays logged in, so when we have things to do at home, its like doing them together. I haven't started to clear out the clutter yet, but that is on the agenda. Im going to go crazy with waiting. I keep checking to see if the timelines have changed or if there is any new news. I feel obsessive compulsive over it. And we JUST filed last month...we have a long wait yet ahead. I think my next project will be to compile a music cd of our favorite music. Both mine and his and make a copy for us both. Anyone else have projects they work on to send their loved one????

I didn't have much clutter since #1 I'm a minimalist ( I HATE clutter and dust collectors) and #2 I had only been in my apt. for a year before Moh got here. I cleared everything out the weekend before he got here while doing my usual cleaning.

Moody,
How did u find it going through Cairo? Anything to watch for? Im so nervous. I've been married before and we have an age gap (he is significantly younger than me) but 4 years of proven relationship. I know we have a few red flags...but how was it for you? How was the interview?

My husband's interview went well but he got tied up in security checks and AP. Cairo seems to be changing procedures lately. It's hard to tell if age gaps and other red flags are the causes of long AP/ARs. There are ppl going through Cairo who have had minimal age gaps (like myself) and very few red flags but still have longish AP/AR. There are others who breeze right through. I suppose only Cairo knows why Cairo does what it does.

Same. I think the only thing I did differently was spend more time on the computer using skype and more money on calling cards. We did long distance for about a year (but saw each other about every two months) and it took about two months to get our visa, so we didn't really have it that bad. I ordered a lot more take out food before he came. I spent a ton of time with my friends. I visited my grand parents in florida. Mostly I just tried to keep busy because i found that when i sat around the house the time passed much much slower.

When he came, i shoved some of my clothes over in the drawers. I might have cleaned. I can't remember. I did get my old desktop computer from high school out and set it up for him so he'd have his own computer and not have to use mine (he likes to use the computer and eat at the same time and it just drives me NUTS). Then my brother gave him his old laptop and xbox so he was alllllllllll set.

I cook allot and try to learn new recipes. I always feed my first batch of experimental dish to my little brother and if he gives it the green light then I make it for my whole family. LOL He knows hes my kitchen lab rat LOL Im going to miss him when he moves out in Oct. Im going to have to find a new person to feed my expirements to. Sigh

jigzone.com is always fun.

I dedicated a Whole day to cleaning my room after I moved my bedroom was the dumping spot... BUT alhamdulillah.. you can see the floor! AND I'm gonna wait to see how many clothes he brings before I start clearing out draws..

I will try and box dye my hair before he comes.. I swear this Visa has Added Several More Greys!!!!!!!!!

I think I"ll take on a new hobby. Maybe needlepoint or painting something.....I know I will make busy with organizing and cleaning to make room for him when he first comes. Has anyone started collecting their packet 3 materials in advance? I keep organizing, collecting, reorganizing the packet for him to take to the interview with our original documents, photos and other items he will need for the packet 3. Since Im going over at the end of August, I figured I'd just take it to him then. I can mail a final packet of proof of on going relationship right before his interview.

Cooking, maybe i'll try my hand at some Middle Eastern dishes. All I know is his visa can't come to fast!!!

Doodlebug,
jigzone.com is awesome. Thank you. I especially like the part where I can upload photos and make into puzzles and then have HIM do the puzzle. That is cool. Hmmmm...I can think of a few good pics for puzzles....

the best part is you don't lose the pieces!

For me, other then getting online on my usual forums and sites. I have gotten extra job (other then my normal), take some children out that I know for fun, read alot, listen to as much music as I can. I have started sewing this abaya, which I am almost finished with. Shopping, talking to my husband, of course. Gathering educational materials for my daughter. Getting ready for my job in DZ. And attempting somehow to have allmy start-up for the small business I am trying to start in DZ. None of which are sooo interesting but does pass the time.

Let's see...

--I'm experimenting with cooking. Some things come out really good, and some...well, FAIL. We'll leave it at that.
--I take pictures of mundane stuff...like making a pot of coffee or my nightstand, or my eye....before he gets here I'm going to put it all in an album and call it something like "while you were gone". lol
--I got two jobs, one full time and one part time...the full time one is 45 hours a week and the part time one is about 30...
--I'm on VJ a LOT...lol.
--I go to wedding sections of different stores like Walmart and take pictures of different things with my camera phone, then send them to Ramy so we can at least TRY to plan SOMETHING.
--I love how de-clutter is on almost everyone's lists. Ditto. Though since I got two jobs all the efforts I'd made prior to that went out the window because I don't have the time.

Let's see...

I have begun the declutter - - redid the living room, tore up the rug, painted the floor, got a new couch..ok what was I thinking? all i one weekend...i love to crotchet and knit...and I figure my fiance will need some blankets since I live in Northern NH where we get some frigid temps.haha..I am on VJ a lot..ok a lot lot lot..i am always learning more about the visa process...began gathering info for packet 3...planning on our reunion, things to buy...etc...wedding plans...look online for dresses..and of course call and chat w/my fiance when he has a good connection...anyone else w/a SO from Egypt that can empathize w/the crappy connection?? anywho thats what i do...let's see if it can still work for the 6 (yeah right) 7 or 8 or 9 more months of this

OH GOD YES. lol I live in a valley in northeast CT...so when I want to chat for two minutes or have a conversation that isn't all "can you hear me now????" I have to drive to the nearest hill. Sometimes his connection sucks though too.

I "tried" to learn to cook some of his favorite foods (still working on that too!) and I decluttered, cleaned out a dresser for him and started buying him things here and there. We laugh now because we interviewed in Feb and was told he'd have his visa in 6 weeks. I went out and got him some winter things. Next thing I know I'm out getting summer stuff. So much for the 6 weeks! My kids would make pictures for him and every week we would send him a big fat envelope with lots of cards, pictures and artwork for him.

3/4 of our conversations both online and on the phone consist of "what????"



I have to say it was a LOT worse the day he was in Alex. Cairo is a lot better but I still can't hear him half the time, not because of the connection but because between the beeping of the cars and the voices of the people shouting, etc. I can hardly hear a word he says.

Normally he'll go on for about 30 seconds about something that I'm thinking is important and I'll just say "i couldn't hear you but I love you". We'll end up laughing and he'll just say "i love you i love you i love you" and then end it. lol

Yes, we always have issues with DSL connections AND cell connections. Mine was horrible on Sprint....but I changed to Cingular and its MUCH better. Also, we use skype alot. I save 1/2 of the per minute rate over my cell and the connections are usually good. We chat skype to skype alot for free. We hate the connections. Its sooo frustrating. But Alhamdolellah, it won't be forever.

lol.. the other day.. he couldnt here ANYTHING..

I was like... can you STEP OUT OF THE STREET!!!!!!!!!! when were on the phone!!!???!!!

and then when he's walking at the sea... and all I hear is Wind

Speaking of weather....how have those SO's that HAVE arrived in the US handled the winters here? My SO thinks he will freeze to death. (I agree) What types of things help with the adjustment to our weather here.

Decluttering seems to be the favorite passtime.

I haven't begun to start to learn any egyptian cooking, however I did find a few Middle Eastern Restaurants in our area. One is a Hookah Cafe and has the best Koshery, Mahshie and Falafal. And the smell of the hookahs brings soo many memories.

What is the most romantic thing anyone as done for their SO from this distance? Or the most unusual thing sent. Ive done the love dedications from www.lovingyou.com and mailed him cookies I made. But thats it so far. He loves Rabbits (I know..sort of weird...but he loves them) and of course football, so I got him a stuffed bunny holding a soccer ball and scented it with my perfume. He LOVES that. And I started writing his mother letters. (Im sure he'll save these for "evidence" for our interview)

I've tried some Egyptian cooking, that's what I'm failing miserably at but I'm getting better and trying to cook like his mom by the time he gets here! hahaha. My biggest problem is currently finding the right ingredients...ok it doesn't taste BAD...but it doesn't taste like what it's supposed to!!!

He lived here in the states for about 2 years (that's when we met! lol) and he used to wear like 4 shirts all year round.

Most romantic? Two days after I got back here I bought the soundtrack for a movie we saw while I was there (Music and Lyrics...lol) and played songs from it for him over the phone.

My husband will experience his first Michigan winter in about 5 mos. That ought to be fun! Winter in Alex/Kafr Dawar is similar to Autumn in Michigan so that's been covered. He brought a hat, gloves, long johns and sweaters with him for prep. We'll have to buy warmer gloves and a warm winter coat when the time comes.

Because I was married to an Arab previously I had the cooking down pat already. When I visited with his family I learned to make a few authentic Egyptian dishes. Moh actually prefers "American" food so we eat a mixture of Egyptian/Arabic/Italian/Mexican and other "American" foods. We go to Deaborn every few weeks to eat at the Lebanese restaurant there. There are several shisha places but Moh is never interested. I've even suggested we buy one but that didn't interest him either. He didn't smoke it much in Egypt anyways. Everyone is different, though. Ask your SO if that is something that would interest him and perhaps buy a shisha for the house.

The most romantic thing I did for him while we were waiting? I sent him a card with the packet 3 stuff he needed. I don't do romance long distance. Sure we said all the I love you's two humans can say and all that mushy stuff but that's where it ended. Neither of us sent packages or letters or anything. It wouldn't have helped anyways.

Just a tip for those who are waiting on SOs....ask them what would make them comfortable. Odds are they won't really want too much extra than what you already have at home. The one thing that we are planning on getting soon is a hand held bidet. Moh doesn't care for cleaning with a cup.

How sad is it I didn't even know what a bidet was until this year??? hahahahahahaha

Now I want one too.

Good tip. I asked my husband what are the three things he would miss the most from home and would want in the US. His list was simple and these items make him fill a bit more at home so far from home.

I did get the bidet hooked up before he got here too. Did it all by myself!

I think I should add that to my to-do list...but the good thing is that my mom's boyfriend is a plumber so if I mess it up then at least it can get fixed!

hahaha..yes it is loud where my SO lives to near Alex with cars ppl and half the time I cant hear him and I will say I have no idea what you are saying but I love you...and we laugh about this....hahaa

Care to fill us in on the type and instructions? I was looking at the pipes around the toilet the other day and I just can't picture in my mind where to hook the thing up.

Can you see the water pipr that feeds water to the toilet? there is a little knob to turn the water off? it would be attached there.

Here is an example of a low end model. You can buy really expensive and fancy models too.

I guess I don't get how water will go both in the toilet and in the hose...in other words how it will go to two different places from one hole.

That was the kind they had in our flat, but it was metal. I hated it 'cause when you pooped (i know that's gross but ya know..) the poop would stay on it so I would have to clean it so that he wouldn't know I did number 2. lol. I want the kind like you have in your kitchen faucet, though I can just see my kids fighting with it and getting the whole bathroom soaked.

You see that little black lever? The water will run when you move it. Just like the water doesn;t keep flowing into the toilet when it is filled with water -only when the tank is flushed.

Don;t worry about cleaning your poop off...you just need practice. You can buy some fancy ones that move and spray your whole bottom and then move back automactically ($300-500) The japanese have some fab ones.

How close is your toilet to the shower? You can always put in a long hand held shower head if its close enough

It's close but it wouldn't be too great to look at with the hose hanging out of the shower and around the corner. I'll have to go hunting tomorrow and see what I can find since I know he won't use toilet paper since he had no clue what it was until I went there. lol

im dying for a bidet....I hate using a cup, and im sure sofyan does too....just havent got around to it....

things we did to pass the time....i worked 2 jobs, and talked to him online when i wasnt working, and then gave up and moved to jordan lol...

I actually got ours off eBay. I didn't want to spend a lot of money on it and got it for about $30.00. It was SOOOO simple to hook up. Just turned the water off to the toliet, hooked up the tubing and it was ready to go! Looks like this one HERE

the link won't work but i never thought to check ebay!

I actually just noticed that i wrote here.. instead of Hear...... Derrrrrrr..

I soooooooooooooooooo miss the bidet!!!!!! I will follow up and get one ASAP now. Im jealous!! I WANT ONE TOOOO!!! Using cups, natural baby wipes just isn't cutting it. I think he'd die without one anyways...better get busy!!