I am sure some statements stung a bit, but I kinda thought the thread was quite informative and provided you with a bit more guidance different than how your lawyer could!

I hope it works out for you.

Thank you for your comments. The statements did not sting - it disappointmed me because people again choose to speak before knowing the facts. This is a support website - not a governement mandated place to visit. Opinions and statements were made taht were no better then exactly what the CO did - assumptions without proof - conclusions without facts - decisions without at least looking at all evidence. I did however, already know the information offered. My whole point - please ask questions before commenting. I am a very detailed researcher and do not act without knowing what I am doing. My lawyer is offering advice he should not be offering me ( how to get around the system), but he is trying to get my husband here and if that means breaking a few rules on his side then I guess he is willing to do that.

You do realize that everyone and their mother are going to now descend on the thread in question?

Messageboards=drama.

That is their choice to do so and I am okay with that - I just wanted to make a point with a clear board. And yes- you are right - message boards = drama - but that is because people choose to do that. I just want to come here and try to help people and to give information - it is just like my petition I tried to start and give people here the oportunity to sign it - they assume it is something I am doing for my personal case - but that is far from the truth. It was planned to do after we got to the states and for all people - but we got stuck here, so I decided to do it now because I have the time to devote to it. It is merely a statement to get people to think a little about what they are doing and saying - if that is wrong - I apologize.

And jsut so people know - I did not cry because the things people said stung - I cried because I just do not understand why people sit here and do things no better thena the way the government and CO's do to all of us and I cried because people would not listen to what I was trying to say. For those reasons I do not usually go on and introduce myself to groups - this is what happens.

But thank you for your statement - it was correct.

I agree with Lal brandow. Shonnie and others gave some excellent advice, and you're not even paying attention to what's been said. Remove the emotion from the 'he said she said' which will get you nowhere, and address the issues that they cited for not being approved. This is emotional for you, but not for them....address each claim in a methodical fashion and not from the standpoint of 'they fabricated!!'

The very nature of your thread called for speculation & the simple fact that you started the thread calling for advice opened you up to it. Ultimately, no one here can tell you the 'magic answers'. How in the world would everyone here 'know all the facts' of your case? Even by you presenting them, they are your perspective of the facts of your case.

If you don't want to hear the answers, don't ask the questions!

IF INEED HELP - I WILL ASK POINT BLANK!

Aicha dont put yourself out there like this, there are some that will NEVER get it no matter how hard you try. Until they are in that position they wont know. You tried, help those that look for the help and i thank you for what you have posted, between you and a few others you got me started on the process otherwise i would have been lost.

I did not ask for advice - I MADE A POST BECAUSE SOMEONE ASKED ME IF I POSTED ABOUT MY EXPERInCE YET - I listened to everything that everyone said - but you can not give advice without asking questions. It is amazing how, my post turned in to be, me asking for help - if I want help - I will ask for it - there were those who asked me in a personal message if I needed assistance and I appreciate the way they did that. MY POST WAS IN HOPES TO HAVE OTHERS ALSO POST THEIR EXPERIENCE - NOT TO GET HELP OF ADVICE! IF THEY WANTED TO ASK ME MORE QUESTIONS - THEN GREAT - ASK ME, BUT ASK SOMEONE IF THEY NEED HELP BEFORE OFFERING UNDUE ADVICE.

And by the way - my emotions are jsut fine and are under complete control - I went into this marriage with knowing taht we could possibly denied - I DO NOT HAVE A PROBLEM WITH THAT! I AM PREPARED TO LIVE HERE FOREVER - I CAN GO BACK TO THE STATES AND SEE MY FAMILY ON VISITS - I AM MERELY HERE TRYING TO HELP OTHERS - NOTHING MORE - NOTHING LESS. IF INEED HELP - I WILL ASK POINT BLANK!

How does your thread help anyone other than giving you a means to vent? The discussion quickly turned into people offering methods of how to address the issues, but you were more concerned with calling the COs liars. Nothing's wrong with venting, mind you, but to dress it up as 'helpful' seems a bit off to me.

BTW, did you not go to the interview with your husband? If the problem was they were unsure of your communication skills, you could have been brought in to illustrate them.

BTW, did you not go to the interview with your husband? If the problem was they were unsure of your communication skills, you could have been brought in to illustrate them.

Okay - enough said - I tried and my point was still not understood. And yes - I was at the interview and seh is correct - the CO here does not allow the USC into the interview - they do not even allow you to wait by security.

And just to set the record straight - I did not tell the CO that their report was a fabrication or a lie - I merely was stating that to this group - and in my detailed interview letter taht was just for pure purpose of record and meant to be a little colored - I did not, again, did not tell them that they lied - I made a statement that would open the door a little to consider that there may have been some misunderstandings, misstatements or miscommunications - big difference. If you think this is just a nice way to tell them they are lying - fine, but it was jsut a statement!

I think Lisa you are spot on in your observation, but just a point of clarification, Casablanca does not allow the UCS in the interview.

So you are basically saying that as long as you didn't "formally" send a statement to the CO...............in the meantime it is still okay to come here on a forum and start to make some very serious unsubstantiated accusations against them?

NO - really thre is one bad thing about talking over computers - no one ever seems to get the point. I did formally send the letter to have on record at the CO - I did not say in the letter that there was fabrication - I only used that word here - not in the letter. I have more than enough prrof that you are not priveledged to see, that does back up anything I am saying. My statement of "colored" was in regards to the emotional and outside interferences which may have palyed a role in the interview. SIMPLE

If it's not true...to the point where you are now actually "backing" away from your accusations of lying or fabricating, then why even make them in the first place?

Either here on this forum, or anywhere?

I would and never will back away - I just do not have 24 hours a day to keep posting! I have a life with my husband and we have work together to do for our lives.

Are they true or not? And if you are now say they are not, and that you were just "coloring" the situation (bear in mind that lot of people get sued for libel in this country, for "coloring", especially when it turns out that the "coloring" is not true.).....

Why even make them in the first place then?

Everyone here, whether you believe them or not, can empathize with you and your situation. I myself have spent 2 years and 1 1/2 months apart from my wife. And in between, there have been ups and downs with this immigration system that most people can't imagine. There were really some awful days.

Just about everyone else here has a tough story to tell,............ about the difficulties during their immigration process.

At the same time, when you say things like you said below, then you can't just expect us all to say "Yeah..you're right...the consulate IS a bunch of liers etc....".....just for "support"

Suffering and hardship doesn't give you the right to make unsubstantiated claims (which you are retracting now......but in your other thread, that's not how you started).

Not retracting anything - just apparently not bveiong understood, but that is okay - and to set the record straight again - My emotions are fine - like I said before, yes we would like to be in the states, but I am living here and we are together, so our emotions are fine.

They are obviously unsubstantiated, since you appear to be backing away from them now. Which is what many of us were trying to tell you to do in the first place....... to just concentrate your efforts on doing the things you need to do to convince the consulate the relationship with your husband is genuine........

Did you just expect to come on here and make whatever claims you chose to do....and we were all going to just "support" you regardless, and never even "question" some of the claims you were making?

Now , you seem stunned by some of the reaction.

These are excerpts of what you wrote, from your posts in the "Foreign Embassy" forum...


first
Do I find it helpful - lol - NO! This whole report of what the CO wrote in her report was fabricated. She took details from our interview to turn them into something else that was never said.

then a few posts later...

That word was again only said here - would I say those words in a letter - no - I am a little more intelligent than that. Do I need to continue to defend myself to you - No - if words are so strong here that they hurt me - then I would not be coming back to answer. I am not a fool - people voice thongs on here to just say what they feel - but would I ever go so far as saying those exact words in my letter to the CO - No.

Maybe fabrication was too strong of a word to use - but assumtive is not - feel free to read my attachment - it is a detailed account of my husband's interview - and at the same time please realize that this consulate is very good at lying and doing whatever they choose. And even sadder - the way interviews are done - it will always be my word against theirs - there are no tapings of said interviews by video or by voice - so basically the interviewee is always screwed fro mthe beginning if something does not go right in the interview. I can also go have an interview with someone and take things said at that interview and turn them to say what I want to report



Sure looks like you are still accusing them of lying, in that following post as well, and doing more than just "coloring".

Please get my point someone - when people talk to people in the same situation they can say and use a lot of words that they would not say in the face of someone they are trying to get to change their minds. Did I say in my letter that there may have been misunderstandings, misstatements, miscommunications - yes, of course and again, I have the proof to back up my statements, but would I give this group the privelage of seeing that - No. I already gave too much just to not be understood, but that is okay - like I said before, computers are treacherous in some things.
Whatever happens, NO ONE here wishes you ill will.......and I am sure we all want to "support" you.............but just not to the point where that extends to ANY claim, accusation, etc........that you make.

Whether you believe it or not..................I really DO wish you the best of luck and a success with your husband's visa...and hope he will get it sooner....rather than later. Your frustration and pain, is very obvious.


I thank you for your best wishes - I am only sorry that I can not seem to get my point across. But PLEASE - I am not in pain - I am not frustrated - I am just fine and taking life one day at a time, but learned a long time ago - pain, anger and frustration does not ever help anyone. And by the way - good luck to all of you as well - I only wish people the best - not here to argue my case or get help from others for it. Was only trying to give people a little background of our situation because I was asked to - simple - done - over. Thanks for advice, but I have it taken care of.

So you are basically saying that as long as you didn't "formally" send a statement to the CO...............in the meantime it is still okay to come here on a forum and start to make some very serious unsubstantiated accusations against them?

[color="#FF0000"]NO - really thre is one bad thing about talking over computers - no one ever seems to get the point.

Tell me about it......cause you didn't get mine. It is okay - we both are individuals and have our own opinion.

What I meant was you didn't send the CO anything "formally"....accusing them of lying. Rather, you just preferred to come on here and do it. You do not know everything I have sent to the CO and respectably, that is no one's business. Again - Again - all I said was someone asked me to come on here and do a post to just explain a little about me and our situation and experience. I did not realize that so many were going to come back and make statements and try to give advice or correct what I was doing. For one - Why on earth would I put our whole case out there to people who really have nothing to do with it or trying to get it fixed - that really would be just not smart to begin with. Just because I was brave enough to give you a little about our situation and to give you a little of our experieince - did not mean I was handing over the right to anyone to see all of our papers, letters, ect. taht have been sent and received. You got two pieces out of several dozen. Again - Again - I am not asking for advice - I am not asking for help - this was just a sample of our experience. Can I continue to make statements about them - Yes, can I continue to back up my statements - Yes! Do I need to make them out for viewing by the public - No.

So, rather than go straight to them with your accusations, you'd rather just do it on this forum. I have went straight to them and others as well, Senators, Speaker of the House, USCIS, NVC, DOS, DHS, The Ambassador of the CO here, and so on and so on. Is it your business or your privelege to see all of that info - No. The reason I generally do not ever go on places like this and post "my experience" - is because people are never happy until they have the complete run down of the experience from start to finish - I merely do not believe that any of you need to have all of the details - things like that can shoot a person in the foot if those details get out. And Again, you all seem to think I wanted and was asking for advice and help - Again, I was not.

Your statement to the CO, says one thing................and what you are trying to explain to us here, is saying something very different. I was not really trying to explain anything - I was just giving a little background - Again, because someone on here asked me to - simple! I just do not see why that is so hard to understand - I was not asking for opinions, help or advice! If someone wanted to come on my post and reply with - "nice to meet you, if there is anything you need help with or advice on - feel free to let me know" - or just a simple "hello and welcome" - nothing!

If you have facts as you say (that we are not "privy" to etc...)......then why not tell THEM in your letter that they are lying and also give the proper authorities the proof you claim to have? These things have been done! Again I say this.

You say you have things to back it up.............then I fail to see why you are only accusing them here, but not directly. I have done this directly - am I going to give everyone that information or how I am acieving my goals at this time - No, not yet, just realize I am making tremendous progress with my methods.

With that approach, how is anyone supposed to "support" your side of this? I was never asking for support, we are doing just fine on the thngs we are doing to tackle our issues - was just giving a little detail to our experience. If people on here wanted to come back and ask how are you handling your situation? - Can you offer any help at this time to others? - Are your methods working and are you getting anywhere to fix your issues at hand? - etc., etc.

When all you have to say in response is something like....."I have information that corroberates my story .....but I can't tell you all what it is....".............. Have you ever heard the term - "I can not make public evidence until I have completed the process of rebuttal" - ? If I go off and start letting out things that I am using - I could damage my case.

Then, if that is all that you can say to the people on this forum, when you create a thread filled with various accusations , I don't think you should be very shocked when people respond to you in the ways that they did. What do you expect ? I have the right of free speech to make accusations to anyone over anything - but believe me when I tell you, I never make accusations without the ability to back it up. Do I have to explain in detail my reasons for accusations to the public at hand - no, I do not! If I was asking for anyone's assistance THEN it would be different and I would meet with that person on a private basis to discuss all of that information. Just coming on and doing a short introduction and a brief experience layout - did not mean I was crying out for help and advice or support.


And now you are acting all indignant and surprised.................. No - that is just what you think, but not the accurate truth - if you know me as a person, then you can make statements like that - but you do not know me as a person. I TRULY am not surprised at all and really have no anger in this either - really you do not know me and I am a very laid back person, things like this do not bother me, just wake me up to debate - like I said before, this is why I usually do not go on public forums and do this;

If everything is so true, I fail to see what you have to lose by writing all this to the CO directly, and in fact, it should then be the consulate that is "shaking in their boots"..................with all this "proof" you claim to have against them. I have wrote many things to the CO and again I will say - I am not sharing those things with the public at this time. I am not hiding any of my feelings from them in this matter and I believe every person and contact I have made in any government office knows exactly the things I believe took place in this interview. I just have chose to do things in a little more of a diplomatic manner then just blurting in their faces "oh, you lied", that would be very ignorant on my part - I want to make points added with proof and I have been doing just that, not just say "you lied" - pure and simple.

In the meantime, I think you should also understand when all you have to offer is your "word" to everyone here...........as your argument in defense of all the accusations that you have made.............then you shouldn't act so shocked , when all you seem to get , is so much doubt about those very accusations, in return.

I DID NOT ASK FOR ADVICE - HELP OR SUPPORT - I just did what someone else asked me to do because I was new to this website. I DID NOT OPEN THE DOOR TO SAY "HELP ME PLEASE" - I have my case taken care of!

How were we supposed to know *any* of that? You did not put that disclaimer in your story, did you?
It's the nature of this community to offer suggestions; you didn't let anyone know that they were forbidden. If you wanted to keep your story private you could have emailed it to the person requesting it.

I was vasked about my situation and if I had informed the VJ of my situation - No I had not as of yet - been really caught up in the process of fighting this denial. I did update my timeline and put a note in my profile - but now I will try to give details of our situation.

Our interview for a K-3 VISA was on March 21, 2007 at 8 am with the wonderful Casablanca, Morocco consulate. I know this consulate has had a lot of mixed review and according to our lawyer this consulates denial rate is over 50 percent. I would love to add our detailed step by step interview, but it is quite large. Through many daily contacts and lies from the consulate - I finally got the confirmation date of return of our papers and also the reason for denial. Mind you I contacted them daily and finally sent out a very long letter to the Ambassador, the Consulate General and teh Cosulate Chief Officer - with this I got the specific reasons for denial. Here is that response:

........

actually she kind of did...

I didn't read this entire thread but I did read about certain details of the marriage.

Forgive me but I don't think I could marry someone that I had to use hand gestures with and have to have a friend to translate. I can see the CO's concern. Sorry.

I didn't read this entire thread but I did read about certain details of the marriage.

Forgive me but I don't think I could marry someone that I had to use hand gestures with and have to have a friend to translate. I can see the CO's concern. Sorry.

I said, "forgive me", first. That always makes things ok. Same with, "with all due respect".

Yep, wadr always softens the blow

You know what they say, love is the universal language...

I thought that it was music?

I think that is the universal second language.

They have courses: "Music for Love speakers"

I admit, I had to look that up after I kept reading it in your posts!

I think it's still a grey area cos nowhere does that say she doesn't want advice or she was only doing it for vj's 'benefit'

It's not a grey area at all...................it's more like a "vanished" area.

That's because , contrary to what she is now saying, she actually did come on to VJ early that morning, and made NUMEROUS posts , each in a different forum, and each one a copy of the other..................all asking for everyone's "help" with her petition.

And the only reason you all don't see them anymore, is that each of them has been deleted. Apparently, the moderators weren't too keen on her spamming the website with all of her requests for people to come and join her petition.

Then, apparently, after making "multiple" posts, someone must have asked her what her story was all about.

And then that's when the rest of this started............

You want my situation - here it is in a nutshell - there are many reasons why I was not ready to discuss this.

As for the petition - so sorry - I was new to this site and did not know where to post things and did nto realize that if you make one post - it comes up somewhere for all to see - so again sorry for that.

I will also apologize for coming off so strong, but you ca nchoose to believe me or not - I was not ready for this subject. Someone asked me before I posted anything about the petition. And just to clear that grey area - that petition is not for me it is for all people who go through this grueling process - this was something my husband and I were going to do when we got back to the states - well that kind of got a little sidetracked, so we figure we have time now - we might as well work on it now and hopefully by the time we get to the states we will have enough backing to make some changes for all of the people this affects - not just me - all of us.

I have been together with my husband for almost 15 months now and we have been living together for almost 8 of those 15 months. I luckily am in a position where my children are grown, still very young, but grown - so I could make the decisions to come and live here while we went through all of htis process. When I came here the first time and stayed for 2 1/2 months - I left to go back to the states to get my stupid exit stamp taht I was told by our lawyer that we needed to file the papers - that was so hard on both me and my husband - our health was affected and the emotions were just out of control - I returned back to Morocco and we made a decision that we would not be apart again and that I would stay here until we could go home to the US together, as a family!

I paid out 1800 to lawyer who was a specialist in immigration and had over 17 years of experience in the field. Regretfully the man did not own up to his experience. Not one time did this man ever talk to me and my husband - it was always communication through his paralegal - there was no prepe for the interview process, the only thing we were told from them was "do not worry, it is only a few simple questions, do not answer anymore than the specifics and remember - your proof is that you guys live together!" Wow - was that a joke! Since the denial - this supposed lawyer, has only contacted the CO one time - that was teh day after our inerview - they did not reply and the lawyer never contacted them again. Then the paralegal went out of the office due to health problems of her child - I got transferred to another paralegal - they in turn were not responding to me - when they did it was to lecture me on diplomatics - I did not have any diplomatics at that point because the people I hired to do this job and help us - were sh--ing on us - more than the CO. I was told wer will work with you when you can get the SEnator of your state involved and if they want we can work with them and present case law, however, I think you should consider divorcing and moving your petition to another country for processing, the Casablanca CO is a problem CO andyou will never get your VISA through there even if it is reaffirmed.

My lawyer said to me the last time I actually spoke with him, "Do not contact me unless you have a problem - taht is what you have a paralegal for to communicate with - only contact me when you have a problem" - Wow! - I thought I did have a problem - we are fighting our denial!

I will still stand by my statement that the CO took a simple question of "how did you learn english? - response "friends helped me" - and turned it around to we have help communicating in all areas, e-mails and even when I am in Morocco visiting. I am sorry if I view that as a fabrication - I will continue to stand by that in whatever word you want it in.

To continue my story - I thought we would have been home by now - my mother is 65 years old and my step-father is 50 - age difference (they have been togetehr for over 20 years) - anyways - tehy both have health issues - my step-father has to undergo esophogael dilations every month , which consists of anestesia. The last two times he went under - they had to revive him. Now he was just informed that he has a thoracic hernia that is engulfing his entire right lung and he is on oxygen 24/7 - he is scheduled to undergo surgery fopr this on May 11 - their insurance does not cover any in home care and the rehabilitation from this will be extensive, if he survives. I was informed of this after I was already here and this is why we had hoped to be home by now.

I gave up my home and everything when I moved here - when we went back to the states we were planning the move over by my parents so I could be there to take care of them. I am the only one they have - my sister is on the east coast and does not have a relationship with my mom - she has even told me that when she dies, she will not take the time to drop everything in her life to come to the funeral. My mom has sent us an emergency letter - and I have transferred that to the Senator, which I now have contact with - they are trying to expedite our case. I will post more later - this is long enough.

- when does it all stop - when do people get to make choices to live their own lives? When?

Reply to the last two posts -

That has been a consideration - I very much want to be there for my mother and step-father.

The problem I am trying to work out on that issue - I have no home to go home to anymore, I gave that up when I moved here, could not afford to pay rent there and live here too - my mother deos not have room to put me up - my children's landlords will not allow someone to stay with them any longer than a week. so currently I am trying to find a home, let alone going back to work. I have been off work for awhile due to a car accident and have been going through a lot of rehabilation myself - I was trying to change careers and have been working on that since I have been here, luckily I had some money to live on for awhile, but to say the least - that is disappearing.

Anyways - I am working on getting back home to them - I just have factors to work out to get there and have a place to stay. I guess a part of me too, worries about whether or not they will think I have given up on our marriage because I have said that my plans are to live side by side with my husband until we can return together - and God forbid, the way they work - who knows.

Thank you for the suggestions - I can only continue to take this one day at a time and do my best to get back to them - leaving my husband, I fear would not be good for me or him - this whole situation is not a good one. Last time we were apart, both of our health hit rock bottom - I can not even imagine this time since we have actually been able to live together and with everything happening in Morocco - you ca nsee where my mind is - not a good place.

None of this is right for anyone in this situation - when does it all stop - when do people get to make choices to live their own lives? When?