I have been struggling to keep this marriage working... NO I did not marry my husband for the Green Card. This is the short version of my story.
Got married Oct 04 in Romania. Got the DCF approved the same month. Got here in the US in Nov 04.
Since then I've learned about two bad habits my husband "forgot" to mention to me, one involving alcohol, the other... let's call it another addiction. These two are the reason for me wanting the divorce. Talked to my husband about them countless times, cried and begged, threatened and shouted. The result is nothing is ever going to change. There are other "benefits" related to these addiction but nothing that can qualify as abuse... and even if I even got life threats, I do not want to call the cops or go to a shelter. To keep the story short: my husband will never change and I'm done trying to, so I decided to file for divorce.
As I said, we got maried in Romania. In the US we do not have any marriage license or similar. But my visa was granted because of the marriage. So, my question is: can I file for divorce here in US (how?) or do I have to file in Ro? Can I still remove in August the Conditional Permanent Resident status?
I have a good job, I'm paying my bills, building my credit, I can make it on my own (so the I-834 is not a threat to my husband).
Any advice would be appreciated. Hope the ones that have fraud in mind won't bother to reply. There is nothing more heartbreaking than to see my marriage turned into this... so please, try to give me the benefit of the doubt.
Thank you

You can get divorced here.

You can file for divorce in the US.
Yes, you can file the I-751 alone (waiving the joint filing requirement on the basis of a bona fide marriage that terminated in divorce) to remove the conditions as soon as you have a divorce decree. You do not have to wait until August if the divorce is final earlier. You will need to be able to establish that the marriage was genuine.

CristinaS

I am sorry things have not worked out for you.... If I were you I would go and speak to a lawyer get some advice on what to do next... Form what I have read you can lift the condition on your own you just have to show that you entered the marriage in good faith... but again that is something for you to talk to a lawyer about as I am sure you dont want to disclose all the facts here...

You are in my thoughts at this time... I know it is hard when a marriage come to an end...

Kezzie

oh Cristina, I'm so sorry to read your news
you'll have a lot to think about in the coming months.. I recommend that you gather up ALL your immigration paperwork, marriage certificate etc and keep it somewhere safe. Also whatever evidence you have that your marriage was bonafide.. in other words, all the things you will need for your I-751 when you do file it.

Hang in there, sweetie, and let us know when you need a boost.
xxxmo

As the others have stated you can divorce here and lift the conditions on your own. Just gather all your evidence so you can proceed. I am sorry to hear that you are having difficulties and wishing you all the best in the upcoming future. Hang in there and stay strong. My family will be thinking of you during this trying times.


Mary

Christina,

I am so sorry to hear your news. I am glad to see that you have a good job, and can go forward with that. I can't offer any other advice than what has been suggested above, so I wish you the best in the future.

(((HUGS)))

Laura

Thanks for all the answers and all the support. Meauxna, I may be stupid when it comes to men, but I'm not stupid when it comes to my life. You know what this was all about for a while now... I have already gathered all the proof I might have for INS. Scanned everything and stored them, together with all my legal docs at work where he cannot touch them. I'm looking for an apartment and if everything works as planned, I want to move this Saturday. Funnily enough, guess who's helping me move? His family!
Oh well, who says that life is all about happiness. Maybe some of us have to struggle all the way... Not sad anymore. Just mad and a bit bitter that my second attemp to have a happy family ended in a fiasco. Oh well...
I'll keep you guys posted and hope for your prayers.
Thanks,
Cristina

Well, it's done now!
I moved out this Saturday as planned. I am trying to keep things as simple as I can for my daughter's sake. I am not filing for divorce yet... I am still hoping in my stupidity that somehow this is the moment of truth, the moment when my hysband will realize what he's missing and give up on all the bad stuff. I'm not betting my life on it though. All I'm trying to concentrate on right now is be safe, be at peace and not give in to promises anymore. But it is hard! I love him, I feel insecure and it hurts...
I'll keep you posted.
Cristina

Cristina,
I really hope that everything works out for you. I can completely understand your hope, I just hope that if he doesnt make the changes that you need for him to, and ultimately that is his choice, that you have the strength to stand up for yourself.
~Angel~

I'm praying for the best for you!
*hugs*
Lynne

Christina - something you need to know...

You can waiver and file on your own ONLY under the following two circumstances:

- Divorce has not started
- Divorce has completed.

If you are in the throes of divorce, you are not entitled to file on your own. An immigration judge "may" grant you an extension until your divorce is complete... but realize that they also may not. In the case of them not granting an extension until your divorce is complete, removal proceedings will ensue.

I just wanted to make you aware, as I have looked into this myself - and confirmed with the USCIS themselves.

Lucy

Sorry to hear this.

Hoping things get better for you

ANYONE4TEA!

I have read some of your post, and I have come to the conclusion that you always feed the worst into people. Why are you so negative! I am sure that we are aware of the situation and outcome of certain cases, but for heaven sakes, stop with the negativity!!!! You make people lose sleep with those kind of responses.

"I just wanted to make you aware, as I have looked into this myself - and confirmed with the USCIS themselves. "

Who are you to judge!!!!

please point out where the negativity in anyone4tea's post was? i must have missed it because it seemed that they were just providing some information along with everyone else.

If you missed it so did I, i was thinking the same thing

Good luck in the decision you make

Maybe just a good heads up. This country is one of legal bs as you should know.

Just wanted to say sorry to hear this

Why ask this...



...after saying this?

Foreign fiances/spouses often marry for love and not for the green card. We quit our jobs, sell our house, leave everything behind to start a new life in America. If the marriage crumbles and the foreign spouse decides to stay in America, it is unfortunate that some people assume the worst and decide that the foreign spouse married for the green card. It’s not easy to go back to our homeland and start all over again just like that. Remember, we are human beings, not goods or property subject to return or replacement by manufacturer if buyer is not happy.

By all means, the foreign spouse has the right to ask the government to stay in America.

PatientlyWaiting,
I could not agree more

Buuuut, of course, there are poeple who only reads part of posting that they want to read, and interpret it the way they want it.

Aaaaawww here....

Cristina,

I am so sorry to hear that things are not working out for you and your marriage These long distance relationships are very tough. There are things that I didn't know about my husband either until we lived together, but luckily nothing quite so drastic as your situation. We still have our ups & downs, but we're working through things.

Good luck to you with whatever you decide to do. Please let us know how you're doing or if you need to talk, vent, etc..

I am so sorry to hear about this. Not all marriages work out, and understandably you have a great deal on your plate, especially as there is a child involved. I wish you the best as you straighten things out.