I believe how much someone spends on what should not even be an issue.
We don't have to defend who spends how much on what on their SO to strangers on the internet. It depends on the individual couple and the circumstances.
It has been established to be careful sending money over, we are all very aware of that here.
But how much and for what is a deeply personal choice and everyone has their own opinions about it.
It is not a measuring stick to ' win one up ' as if to say my man is not a scammer because he never asked for money ........ or your man must be a scammer or a wussy because he accepts money. It seems this springs from a " I have a real relationship and you don't " motivation or justification.
Nobody can define anyone else's relationship.
Send money or don't send money, it really is no one's business to question that.
I know one thing, if married couples can't share their money as the need arises, then maybe they need to rethink their
trust issues or stop looking for foreign men.
Africa is not just Africa. One can not compare the poorest of all African nations with the more developed ones.
The economy in S/L for instance is so broken and the infrastructure so weak after the brutal decade long war
that I just smile when I read posts about ' everyone can find work doing something'. Tell that to the thousands of youth that are begging for jobs, tell it to thousand of amputees, tell it to the ones who had great paying jobs for years working for the UN and now are jobless because the region has stabilized and the UN has moved out.
Those that are blessed to find a job make a few dollars......at that rate the SO's would never get here if they would have to pay it all themselves by selling fufu on the road.
If your SO can do that, consider yourself blessed. Consider the country more developed than others.
Heaven forbid an SO really gets sick and dies because the USC cops an attitude and goes to get a pedicure before believing
he is in genuine need to pay the doctor. People do get sick and die everyday.
They face yellow fever, typhoid, malaria, dysentary, cholera and chest infections all the time.
The life expectancy in my SO's country is 39. He has surpassed it by several years.
The hospitals are shacks and the mortuary looks like an outhouse in S/L.
By all means check the hospital stories out in the beginning to verify threy are really sick, send your networking friends you hopefully have made and the pastor by.......do what you have to do but let us not be so rigid and cold to not help where help is truly needed or judge someone who has done so.
One would hope that the working SO's never lose their jobs or geez, some just may have to end their relationships because they
now would think they get scammed. This whole scamming talk has taken on an undertone of " mine is bigger than yours." " I am smarter than you ".
I am not singling anyone out , I have nothing personal against anyone here. I am discussing my viewpoints like everyone else and they are not directed at anyone in particular. I wanted to get this of my chest for days now.
I hope we can make a U - turn and bounce back to a more positive forum.
you will tell me a good joke to make me laugh and remind me not to take myself so serious on here. 
" 
, he, he). 
