Im gonna go a bit off topic here, since the topic seems to be about scamming these days, and bring a little light heartedness into the mix. I remember a old thread from some years back and thought Id do a 2008 one.

The topic: What fond memories and funny stories can you share about the country you visited?


Well one I can remember off the bat is how I got my husband and I arrested becuase of my big mouth.

I was not aware of the "donation" system they have set up in Naija where you donate to the police at "all" traffic stops and road checkpoints . My husband eventually told me that this was the way it was in Naija but still lemented on the fact that they were all criminals and crooks and how corrupt the police were. Well me and my sense of superwoman justice decided I was gonna stand up for the people and speak my mind and after a heated argument with my husband my irritation level convinced me that now would be the perfect time to tell them what I thought becuase after all I was an "American Citizen" What could they do to me?

WRONG! After telling the officer about how the system was just plain wrong and they were nothing more than mere criminals taking from the poor, I and my husband found ourselves being escorted off . As we made our way down the dirt road we suddenly were directed off into a field with tall grass and what appeared to be a junk yard of old cars. I thought to myself "were dead"! Imagine those movies where they always take the person off to the bush before they shoot them! Well that was all that was going through my head as we approached. Im thinking "it was nice knowing you baby". When got out of the car and the police officer started leading us down the path I was ready to piss my pants but then out of knowhere appeared a old looking building and some other officers. Then I finally realized that we were at the police station.

We ended up being detained for 6 hours where they kept yelling at me and telling me it was a crime to insult an officer and pressuring me to sign a statement. All the while they are pulling my husband to the side and yelling at him that he has married a prostitute and what kind of man cannot keep his wife quiet? I wanted to tell them what I thought about that! However I must say I stood my ground and refused to sign that statement . and a good lecturing from some of the nicer officers and $100 later we were finally released. All in all this experiance really helped me to have a higher respect for other countries and their system of doing things. It also tuaght me the value in talking about others behind their backs!

On the same line while I was there we had decided to go from Lagos to the Enugu area to meet his parents and some of the 15 siblings. We were traveling in a mini van. His brother driving, his older female cousin in the front passenger seat and Joseph and I in the mid section. As we left Lagos the traffic stops became quite frequent. Sometimes it seems they were 2-3 miles apart , each time checking the papers to make certain we hadn't stolen the van ( 1987 voyager or the likes ) until we paid our token and proceeded . I had joked that there must be less car thieves in Nigeria than the US because they couldn't drive a stolen car more than 3 miles. About half way there the poor old van decided to over heat a few hundred feet past a check point. We parked for a bit and even used some of my bottled drinking water to replace the lost coolant. To proceed we had to forgo AC and quickly I was quite overheated myself. When we pulled up at the next "check" Emmanuel slowed and stated " The car is bad and she is very very sick" The officer looked in the back to see Joseph fanning me and wiping the sweat away as I was laid on his lap. I guess he had never seen an over heated white woman and he rushed us through the check point. This was repeated the rest of the trip, the the cousin occasionally splashing a little water on me when she thought I wasn't sweaty enough. I think we only paid once more for the rest of the trip to Eng. The poor car lost it's transmission during the trip so we had to return on a public bus which is another tale.

HALLELUJAH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! AND AMEN!!!!

Thank you for talking about SOMETHING ELSE!!!!!!!!!!

BLESS YOU CHILD!!!

I would have been scared to death!!!! I had a similar situation when I visited Nigeria, my SO, one of his friends and myself were on our way to the beach. I generally sat in the backseat so as not to draw too much attention to us but this particular time my SO's friend said "no, sit in the front seat so you can take some nice pics." I reluctantly did. On our way, we were stopped at one of those nice cross street checks and my SO's friend was told by the officier that he did something related to a turn which was against the traffic law (we weren't even turning, lol). He began to argue back and forth with the officer and finally said "can I pull of the road so we don't get her killed in this traffic". The officer got in the back seat of the car while we pulled over. They continued to argue and I kept saying to my SO, what are they saying, what are they saying? My SO got out of the car and went to try and talk with the other officer and as they continued to argue in the car, I decided it was time for me.... to interject, lol. I turned and looked at the officer and said "is this the kind of crap you want me to take back to my country? Is this how you want to represent your country when visitor's come here? YIKES!!!! He glared at me, never blinking, as if he were going to kill me. I thought.... oh now I've done it.... I'm going to jail in Nigeria! My SO is back in the car by then and leans toward the front seat and whisper's to me "baby, they just want money". I said almost yelling "OH HELL NO!" He then says to me "I've already paid the other guy, they will let us be on our way now". I was so angry, I was spitting nails. The amount of money my SO gave him turned out to be roughly $3.50, lol. All that for $3.50. Needless to say.... I resumed my position in the back seat for the remainder of my trip, lol.

Funny story. You sound like me. Thinking the officers cared and all. Maybe if we were Abraham Lincoln and Benjamin Franklin Lucky you didnt get escorted off to the local station like me. $3.50 is alot easier to part with than $100

oh no u didnt...lol

No police stories, just a toilet story. I posted it in the cyber cafe before but here it is again.

It was in the middle of the night, we were sleeping and of course I have to use the bathroom again !

There was no electricity but by now I was brave enough to go in the dark. Half asleep I walk down the long hallway and attempt
to enter to use the toilet and there I hear slash splash in the toilet bowl.
I ran to Stephen and said honey there is something splashing in the toilet to which he very sleepily relpied
oh it's probably just a ......( those things that crawl on the walls, can't think of the name , something like a geco).
I grab a flashlight and shine it into the bowl and there is a black fuzzy looking thing in it and it is alive and taking a beauty bath in the water.
It also chewed up our precious toilet paper roll. ( You know that's like pure gold there for me ! )
Now I race back screaming it ain't no.....whatchamacallit ......it is moving and big !
When he heard that he flew out of the bed past me so fast like lightening and when I got there he was attacking a big rat with
a toilet plunger, knocking it upside the head and flushing it into the abyss !

My hero

It had come through the pipes from the outside.

Ah yeah .....we had some fun there

Well, the embassy guard story........so yeah also a police story........

While we were inside the embassy, our friend who waited outside was taking pictures left and right with his new camera phone of the embassy and guards.
When we came back out he was yelled at and when Stephen said just delete it they told him to shut up. He continued to say just delete it and the guards were about to have a hissy fit and threatened to take both to the police station and to jail. One got in Stephen's face and dared him to delete
the pics. Now I was yelling at Stephen to shut up (sorry baby ) and said let me handle this. OOPS.... What wife tells her husband
to shut up in front of important people in Africa ? Exactly !
But I was terrified that both would be hauled off to jail.

My intuition was correct and the guard yelled: yes you shut up, only she will speak, she is a USC, you are on US ground here and have no rights whatsoever, he screamed it several times.
My tactic was to calmly tell the guard about the friend and his new cam phone and that he had no idea he was committing a crime taking pics.
I said I am well aware of this law but he was not informed about such things.
Finally they calmed down and we were all let go.

I just been here "peeking but not speaking"...but when I saw this thread it made my hubby and I laugh about the experience we had! So I thought Iwould share...

Even though we had been stopped at several of those "checkpoints" while I was in Naija...and I knew that you had to slip the cop a few hundred naira to get on your way(usually our driver would pay the money)...I never expected to be in the situation we ended up in one day.

While driving...an SUV full of cops happened to notice me in the back seat of the car cuz we met eyes at an intersection. They made our driver pull over, pointing their guns at us! They then made my husband (who was then my fiance) get out the car and began interrogating him about me. They were speaking pidgin, but I understood the jist of the conversation. "Who is this white woman..where is she from...why is she here...how did you meet her". When he told them I was his fiance and we were getting married later in the month, they proceeded to say that it was "against the law to marry a woman you met on the internet!" They said we need to go to the police station. They made my brother-in-law ride in the SUV, and a cop got in our car, and made the driver follow them to the "so-called" station. (a run-down building in the middle of nowhere...with just a table and chair inside) While cops took my hubby and his brother to separate areas and interrogated them about me...another cop told me to stay in the car and sat down trying to tell me they were doing this for my bennefit to protect me...cuz there where alot of "bad Nigerians" who do bad things to american white women! He then began asking me if I know any other beautiful white women that would help him get to America..OMG

After over an hour...my hubby was told to bring them $400 and they would "overlook" the situation and let us go. The cop again got in our car and the SUV followed us to a bank. During the ride my hubby explained that we had to do what they said or they would make our life difficult..cuz they had both our passports, our paperwork from the registry showing the date of our ceremony, and they had the address we were staying at, and my hubby's cell number! I got pissed off and said "we aint giving them shyt!" Hubby told me to just let him handle it. We went to the bank got the money, and they called my hubby to the SUV and told me to stay in the car...I watched in shock as my baby handed over the cash! I couldnt take it no more...I jumped out the car and went to the SUV telling them they had no right to do this to us..I said I wanted to see in writing, the law about marrying someone from the internet! They told my husband to "control" his wife!..LOL ...and said they would take us back to the station to show us the law...I said OK lets go! My hubby was freaking out telling me to go get back in the car..I said NO! Then suddenly I decided to turn it up a notch! I started crying loudly, shedding tears and everything...saying "I can't believe you are doing this to us...is this how you treat people from another country...is this what you want me to tell people about Nigeria...how can you take money from me like this...this $400 is my Xmas money for my children...how can you live with yourselves...you should be ashamed of yourselves.." by this time I was sobbing so bad I was barely understandable. The head cop got out the SUV and told the guy to give us back the money...the cop tried to only give us $100 back....but he yelled and told him give it all back...and give us our papers too. The cops argued for a few minutes...but finally gave it all back!!! and told us to leave immediately.

When we got back in the car...we began laughing hysterically. My hubby told his brother and the driver what happened...how is wifey stood up to the police with an academy awarding winning performance...and got our money back...and they couldnt believe it! When we got home, he had to tell the whole story to his entire family and they never let me live it down! It continues to be a subject of the family that we all laugh about. My hubby loves telling the story about how no one better mess with his wifey!.....

Truthfully tho...I thought I was gonna end up in jail..or missing! It was scary...but my anger took over. I am not sure I would do it again tho...cuz I think we just got lucky that time... ..whew!!

God Bless

my girlfriend lived in nigeria almost 20 years and never had stories like these to tell.

Ose and Me, I was laughing so loud while reading that story. It was suspenseful and funny too.

I told before of the story I had during my last day in Lagos,when we were driving directly behind a black SUV, which was the big sized SUV like an Expedition or something. The windows were all blackened and it was clean and shining. In the dusty air, it stood out, because it was so clean and big and official looking.

Well, it sure was "official" because as we were driving down a nice road in a gated area where a lot of expats lived, and local people too, the big SUV all of a sudden sharply turned and zoomed into a big compound and shots started firing. Machine gun type of shots were firing and all of the people walking the streets started screaming and running.

We were just arriving at the Bible Guest House that we were staying at on the last day of my trip, since it was close to the airport. The older man who was the guard at the front gate started to panic too and ran into the Guest House gate and would not even let us in. The gun shots were ringing out still, and all we could do was stay outside the gate exposed, but we went to the floor of our SUV, as if a bullet could not get us down there.

Minutes later, the gate opened and we zoomed through it. The gunshots were still ringing but sporatically by then.

Later, we found out that it was a raid. It was either a kidnapping ring or a weapons ring, but the police officials were victorious.

Two hours later, I was on a plane back home. After an entire month of a glorious trip. What a way to go out.

Dont't feel bad you were not the only one it happened to because that is the same exact way that they got us to the police station, and the same things they were asking me "Did I know of any American women looking for mates"?. The funny thing about my story is I had three hundred dollars cash and a credit card. They took money from my husband and brother in law. But, gave me all of my money and things back. I only gave the one that pulled us over a $1. I told him that's all you are getting that's your tip. All of the officers laughed at this point, it was okay because I made friends with the police chief and other officer's that were there. It was not funny because it was the first morning venture out after I had arrived last evening. I was because they were going to make me ride down to the station in a seperate car. I was NO,NO,NO. These (husband and brother n law)are the only two people that I know here in Nigeria. They held us at the station for 5 hours. I was seperated from my husband the entire time at the station. We left Lagos the very next evening but, had an officer that accoompanied us the rest of our stay in Lagos.