yeah you guys are right. New Muslims should be encouraged to take part in Muslim things and not discouraged. I was very shocked by things happening so bad in real life because the very first guy that I got dawah from was online. Actually he was not purposely making dawah nor did we talk about Islam in major detail. But I was just so impressed of his nature. He was Iraqi and we started talking right before the tanks/bombs went into Iraq. War was pretty obvious tough at this point and I was impressed with him because he did not hate me for the war. I was expecting taht he would stop talking to me but no, he said it is wrong to hate an entire country because of a government. I know for a fact I could not have as much courage as he and many others like him di and do even to this day. He did not warn me ever though about how born Muslims eat and spit out reverts though:) But then again, being Iraqi, he may not see that as much in his country, I cannot say anything on tht aspect because I don't know.
After seeing so many frogs, I am grateful everyday that my husband and his family are not like this. they are all nice and accepting even though I am American. Because I know from past "proposals" that after the guy plays with a woman's feelings and tells her yes he'll marry her, but then he cannot bring himself to tell his parents. I've heard stories such as "you are an american and my parents do not like American women because they think they are no good. but oh no we don't hate America, it's not like that" (ok tell me what it is then, lol). And "Um...my mother is really picky and she would not like the way you look but oh I still see you as beautiful don't worry about that. It's not me, it's my mother". lol When my husband was heading back to Palestine, he had told his family about me the day we got married. He called everyone and everyone was happy and congratulating us. One day I was sitting with him and out of nowhere I asked "do you think your mother will like me after she sees me?" He was totally shocked why I would ask such a thing. To this day, he cannot understand what I've been through here. He just reminds me "habibi there are bad people and not everyone is that bad" And sometimes he makes me show him my hands and he says "Are all the fingers on your hand the same?":) he always knows the right thing to say when I'm bummed out. And I love him for that, among other things.

Ok, so on a different note....remember when I said Muslims say arabic things instead of english words right? Well, it was funny. I began watching a movie called Arranged today on netflix. It is about a Muslim girl and a jewish girl in Brooklyn who are teachers and everyone is surprised of why they are friends. Even the kids at school said to the Muslim "don't your people want to shove Israel into the ocean?" So through the movie (I have not finished yet but will tonight), it is about them becoming closer in order to fight people's stereotypes and they end up learning how similiar they are. I've found netflix to be very enlightening in this regard because I love the documentaries I have been getting on the netflix instant movie section:)
So the Jewish family is sitting at the dinner table and they are talking. And I noticed that they are speaking English but some words they say in Hebrew. I was like "wow jews do the same thing Muslims do":) But well, who knows, maybe converts to Judaism do not do that, I dont know.
The main part of the story is the jew and the Muslim dealing with the infanous arranged marriage scenrio. I did not know for one minute ever that Jews did arranged marriages. So far in the movie, the Muslim girl saw one proposal and she rejected him due to age and she di dnot see anything in him even though he was a father's frined. but it did not work out anyways, but the father is being very patient with her. In the beginning of the show I was actually bragging to my husband on the phone of how the jews are not forcing the girl to get married or making her feel bad. My husband does not appear to understand the concept of making women feel bad for not beng married or rejecting proposals. but I spoke to soon anyways. When I left the movie, the Jewish girl (poor girl, her proposals so far have been yucky anyways and one of the guys reminded me of the guy on ...hm...whats the movie called with the guy from Khazakhstan who comes over here and he's all lost in American culture....yeah he reminded me of that guy)....the Jewish mother and her aunt are very unhappy with her rejecting all of tehm and the jewish girl says no, I wont settle for anyone and she left it at that at the moment and stormed out of the room.
Anyways this is long enough and I am sorry for getting way off topic. I just thought this was a neat movie and some of it reminded me of what we had said in this thread so I thought I'd share. If you are into this kidna thingk, go see it on netflix. (netflix brings out the nerd in me:)

yeah but in your case, I wonder how many Libyans are trying to get to USA though even now? So maybe that is why AP did not take so long. but in all ways, you are right, it's all a crap shoot and no one knows what will happen.....

Arranged

Actually, the start of the Israeli/Palestinian conflict can be rested on the shoulders of the Brittish. The US wouldn't hardly help Israel at all until the late 1960s. Now days you can put a lot of the blame on the US, but not the beginning. The most the United States did was vote for the creation of Israel which many other countries did the same or it wouldn't have passed. It was Brittain who lied to the arabs and promised them the land and then later promised it to the Jewish, so I hold the blame of the start of the conflict squarely on their shoulders.

Wayyyy of topic but I thought I would share... so I get a call from a Muslim sister who said "come over for dinner we'll talk" so knowing this lady (she really does like to talk) I brought my daughter (she's 11) because typically we bring food, music and dress of our husband's country. So doing like I usually do we go to her house (typical Arab wife 20 min late) and open the door and SURPRISE... it was a surprise bridal shower for me with all the sister I know and some I didn't lol...

I know some of you have had difficulty meeting and liking muslimahs I have been blessed with a wonderful batch including a great lady I met on an airplane the first time I flew to Morocco that I still keep in touch with (yes April it's you) Alihamdolah I feel so blessed.

One woman who waited for her Pakistani husband for 1.5 years to be approved to come over gave me a book... it's her published works of poetry. While waiting for her husband to come she wrote a book's worth of beautiful poetry.

And to top off the night my 11 year old asked me for a "party" dress... I dont' know why that would make me happy but she wants one of those flashy dresses we wear to parties (well who doesn't) but it's nice that she is growing to accept my lifestyle more and more. hehehe i am a little giddy right now.

Alhumdoolillah you had a great time:) That is neat how people do that and I'm happy you are surrounded by good people like that. And even more your daughter is accepting too. Now go buy her a dress now?

LOL... no doubt if only I could find a place that sells them around here!!

So my husband has a really severe intense hatred to any and all Jews, and I don't know about ya'll but growing up I was taught to not hate anybody, especially not hating a whole group of people just for the actions of a stupid few, plus my family is extremely diverse so chances are if I'm racist against someone then I'd also be practicing racism towards one of my ancestors. I asked him if he's even met a Jew, no. I told him I know lots of Jews in California who don't support Israel or who just don't give a crap one way or another, or who don't know enough to give a crap, but that didn't seem to have any influence on his thoughts. He swears that each and every Jew on the planet is part of a conspiracy theory against the Arabs, at which point I told him he's just going along blindly with what people have been telling him. I'm not asking him to go be best friends with them, I would just like that kind of discrimination to not exist in my nuclear family. I will not tolerate my children growing up to hate any group of people, period. I don't think "hateful" fits under the description of a "good Muslim". On another note, do you know how many Jewish converts there are to Islam? It's surprising!

So my husband has a really severe intense hatred to any and all Jews, and I don't know about ya'll but growing up I was taught to not hate anybody, especially not hating a whole group of people just for the actions of a stupid few, plus my family is extremely diverse so chances are if I'm racist against someone then I'd also be practicing racism towards one of my ancestors. I asked him if he's even met a Jew, no. I told him I know lots of Jews in California who don't support Israel or who just don't give a crap one way or another, or who don't know enough to give a crap, but that didn't seem to have any influence on his thoughts. He swears that each and every Jew on the planet is part of a conspiracy theory against the Arabs, at which point I told him he's just going along blindly with what people have been telling him. I'm not asking him to go be best friends with them, I would just like that kind of discrimination to not exist in my nuclear family. I will not tolerate my children growing up to hate any group of people, period. I don't think "hateful" fits under the description of a "good Muslim". On another note, do you know how many Jewish converts there are to Islam? It's surprising!

sorry, but i am just having a difficult time understanding how someone winds up married to a bigot when they say they are so diametrically opposed to such a viewpoint. this isn't like leaving the lid off the toothpaste or leaving his dirty clothes on the floor-it's like a big deal.
this seems like an awfully big mountain to climb, especially after having already married him. best of luck with that!

sorry, but i am just having a difficult time understanding how someone winds up married to a bigot when they say they are so diametrically opposed to such a viewpoint. this isn't like leaving the lid off the toothpaste or leaving his dirty clothes on the floor-it's like a big deal.
this seems like an awfully big mountain to climb, especially after having already married him. best of luck with that!

I gotta agree with that!
First you say you are not a bigot and dont hate, April. Then you say ' I'm not "diametrically opposed" to his viewpoint as I too do not like neither the Israelis who actively participate in the occupation of Palestine nor anyone in any part of the world who supports the Israeli occupation. ' followed by , ' But I'm saying to forgive the GUILTY Israelis and to look the other way, absolutely not. ' So which is it? And for God's sake answer in English this time...unless you want to answer in Hebrew, which would be fine.

April, i understand what you are trying to say even if others don't. Your wording wasn't perfect, but I see where you were trying to go with your points.

so can i......

God, silly people trying to pick on others who don't put their words together just right drive me crazy. I chose not to let people continue harrassing her when it is clear she is not trying to be hateful. You don't get it and its obvious. There are plenty of other threads to harrass people, why don't you go there.

But I'm saying to forgive the GUILTY Israelis and to look the other way, absolutely not.

God, silly people trying to pick on others who don't put their words together just right drive me crazy. I chose not to let people continue harrassing her when it is clear she is not trying to be hateful. You don't get it and its obvious. There are plenty of other threads to harrass people, why don't you go there.

Thanks S and S. This is all just very hilarious reading all of the follow-up comments, especially the husband who mocked getting popped by a jinn, I would've paid to see that! Lol. But yeah, gosh, I guess forgetting to put one word in a sentence is just a crime these days, I should be publicly flogged. If I MAY redeem myself and insert the one word that I so shamefully forgot, here it goes, the forgotten word in bold: "But I'm not saying to forgive the GUILTY Israelis and to look the other way, absolutely not." Make more sense this time? If not, too bad.

Whose BIL was it that had that conspiracy theory that all Americans and Jews and all Americans being Jews in disguise were plotting etc.? Sounds like you sat in on a conversation with MY husband's family and took notes seriously! Glad to know I'm not the only one. But hey, it's not like our fellow Americans don't have their own conspiracy theories against the "militant Islamists" as they say in the papers. Hey, wasn't it just a couple decades ago that Americans weren't the biggest fans of Jews? And now they're so apologetic for WWII etc. etc. It's like paying reparations for slavery, uh, nobody alive today has been a slave in the south so why do they deserve reparations? That'd be like me demanding a check for my Apache great-grandfather getting his land stolen. It was him, not me, and he's dead now, so move on. I'm just a realist, sorry if that insults anybody.

Thanks S and S. This is all just very hilarious reading all of the follow-up comments, especially the husband who mocked getting popped by a jinn, I would've paid to see that! Lol. But yeah, gosh, I guess forgetting to put one word in a sentence is just a crime these days, I should be publicly flogged. If I MAY redeem myself and insert the one word that I so shamefully forgot, here it goes, the forgotten word in bold: "But I'm not saying to forgive the GUILTY Israelis and to look the other way, absolutely not." Make more sense this time? If not, too bad.

Whose BIL was it that had that conspiracy theory that all Americans and Jews and all Americans being Jews in disguise were plotting etc.? Sounds like you sat in on a conversation with MY husband's family and took notes seriously! Glad to know I'm not the only one. But hey, it's not like our fellow Americans don't have their own conspiracy theories against the "militant Islamists" as they say in the papers. Hey, wasn't it just a couple decades ago that Americans weren't the biggest fans of Jews? And now they're so apologetic for WWII etc. etc. It's like paying reparations for slavery, uh, nobody alive today has been a slave in the south so why do they deserve reparations? That'd be like me demanding a check for my Apache great-grandfather getting his land stolen. It was him, not me, and he's dead now, so move on. I'm just a realist, sorry if that insults anybody.

Thanks S and S. This is all just very hilarious reading all of the follow-up comments, especially the husband who mocked getting popped by a jinn, I would've paid to see that! Lol. But yeah, gosh, I guess forgetting to put one word in a sentence is just a crime these days, I should be publicly flogged. If I MAY redeem myself and insert the one word that I so shamefully forgot, here it goes, the forgotten word in bold: "But I'm not saying to forgive the GUILTY Israelis and to look the other way, absolutely not." Make more sense this time? If not, too bad.

Whose BIL was it that had that conspiracy theory that all Americans and Jews and all Americans being Jews in disguise were plotting etc.? Sounds like you sat in on a conversation with MY husband's family and took notes seriously! Glad to know I'm not the only one. But hey, it's not like our fellow Americans don't have their own conspiracy theories against the "militant Islamists" as they say in the papers. Hey, wasn't it just a couple decades ago that Americans weren't the biggest fans of Jews? And now they're so apologetic for WWII etc. etc. It's like paying reparations for slavery, uh, nobody alive today has been a slave in the south so why do they deserve reparations? That'd be like me demanding a check for my Apache great-grandfather getting his land stolen. It was him, not me, and he's dead now, so move on. I'm just a realist, sorry if that insults anybody.

imagine that, leaving out a word changes the whole meaning.....

That would be my Dh's BIL, the same DH who thought the jinn story was hilarious. If you do not really want actual replies by anyone to your question about what people thought about it, then I wouldn't ask. Sorry my reply was offensive to you and S and S.

Well my goodness. You act like it is all our fault that we read what you wrote the wrong way.
Noobs. Sheesh!

Actually, the start of the Israeli/Palestinian conflict can be rested on the shoulders of the Brittish. The US wouldn't hardly help Israel at all until the late 1960s. Now days you can put a lot of the blame on the US, but not the beginning. The most the United States did was vote for the creation of Israel which many other countries did the same or it wouldn't have passed. It was Brittain who lied to the arabs and promised them the land and then later promised it to the Jewish, so I hold the blame of the start of the conflict squarely on their shoulders.

Nobody's blaming anyone for anything. Looks like you're getting a little defensive.

Nobody's blaming anyone for anything. Looks like you're getting a little defensive.

OK, as I had a day off with Dh, I chose to ask him some things about this thread. He answered as such:

1. Laughed hysterically about the idea of not pouring hot water down a drain, then called me over when he was washing dishes and threatened to pour hot water down the drain, pretended to get socked in the face, then went totally straight-faced about his business.

2. Said the Sunnah is that if a donkey brays in the night, it is because the donkey has seen the shaytan. I asked why is it donkeys can only bray during the daylight hours. He said he's fairly sure they can bray at any time they want to bray in his opinion, but that that is what the sunnah says.

3. Does not give a flip about Israel. Doesn't care one way about Jews or the other. Equally not caring about the Palestineans. Says people are people and governments are governments and wishes more people would just realize that fact (this would be in conflict with my BIL who thinks all Jews and Americans (Americans= Jews in disguise) are in a vast conspiracy to rule the world.)

I'm not "diametrically opposed" to his viewpoint as I too do not like neither the Israelis who actively participate in the occupation of Palestine nor anyone in any part of the world who supports the Israeli occupation. I was just wondering if ALL Arabs share this viewpoint and if it's instilled in them from an early age as it was for my husband and his family/friends/part of Morocco obviously, and how anyone came to take the "edge" off of it, if anyone has been successful with their SO. It's like how my grandma's generation hated black people, and there was an irrational part to it, that's what I want to get rid of. But I'm saying to forgive the GUILTY Israelis and to look the other way, absolutely not. I generally don't discuss things that I hate with my husband or anyone because I'm not a negative person, and it just never came up. This all surfaced when I wanted to go to the future wedding of a Jewish friend of mine and asked if Mohamed would go with me (that is, if we'll be living back in the States by then, if not, sorry friend!). It was as if I'd asked him if I could take a second husband. He said I could go but don't expect him to go. That's fine, he doesn't know anybody anyways!

so rajaa how r u settling back in after just coming back from being with ur s/o? when ever i came back from seeing perviz it always took me a month or two to even be able to concentrate on anything lol....oh and by the way my brother in law is going to take pics of different hijabs in the market then we will tell him what ones we like and he will send them to us so maybe problem solved for a while lol...........

Alrighty ladies and gentleman.... I really appreciate the interaction but please can we keep this thread as the intended supporting aspect we so often need in this day and age? I know I didn't write it but I assumed we as adults would understand and appreicate one another's differences, choose to agree to disagree and move on. This is the Muslim thread... I have to wonder how some of you are acting are you helping or hurting the Islamic cause to anyone non muslim reading this thread. So please if would refrain from the name calling and take it off the thread and in your PM I would appreciate it.

Alrighty ladies and gentleman.... I really appreciate the interaction but please can we keep this thread as the intended supporting aspect we so often need in this day and age? I know I didn't write it but I assumed we as adults would understand and appreicate one another's differences, choose to agree to disagree and move on. This is the Muslim thread... I have to wonder how some of you are acting are you helping or hurting the Islamic cause to anyone non muslim reading this thread. So please if would refrain from the name calling and take it off the thread and in your PM I would appreciate it.

lol i guess you haven't had the chance to see all the drama on this mena forum!

Alrighty ladies and gentleman.... I really appreciate the interaction but please can we keep this thread as the intended supporting aspect we so often need in this day and age? I know I didn't write it but I assumed we as adults would understand and appreicate one another's differences, choose to agree to disagree and move on. This is the Muslim thread... I have to wonder how some of you are acting are you helping or hurting the Islamic cause to anyone non muslim reading this thread. So please if would refrain from the name calling and take it off the thread and in your PM I would appreciate it.

There is nothing saying she can't post a muslim thread. Of course people of other faiths can read or comment, but your criticism is hardly constructive or welcoming to newer members.

I also wonder if you are aware of the fact that there are Israeli's and Jews who are reading this? How do you think they feel? VJ is a diverse community and members are free to read and post. This isnt some exclusive thread for Muslims Only when you, the OP stated in your title... ' or anyone
interested ' . Just my .02 shekels worth.

Settling? I hate being away but I am sucking it up. My husband is having as difficult as a time as me so we both try to put on our tough faces on when we talk msn Im (with cam) lol. But i am trying to hang in there. It didn't help coming back to losing my job but... i started running today hoping it will help my mood.

I am glad you found an alternative to the hijab dilema... now if we can just open more stores thoughout the U.S. I think that would be more helpful....lol

so can i......