my husband got his visa and in days came here for a week to visit and then he had to return back and finish his contract from his job for 3 months. so it was something that couldnt be settled quickly. he had to sign a year contract cuz the visa wouldnt be ready for at least 6 months so he just finished out the contract.

I think it all depends on where you are coming from, I guess.

If you were in my shoes..married. Only saw your husband for 2 weeks last year and not at all this year, then 2, 3, or 4 months of additional waiting can be "the straw that broke the camels back."

I'll be honest and say that more than 2 months would be hard after waiting for so long. I think 4 months would be torturous. I said give him 2 months even if he has nothing to settle, to be in his country etc. But I can see why you would not want to wait too long given your situation.

When Sujeet arrived we had been apart 11 months, and only had seen each other for 2 weeks when I went to India. So I know when he arrived it felt like forever since we saw each other. I would have been stressed waiting even more months. But if it had to happen, I couldn't do anything about it. But, I don't think you should let it be the last straw. Maybe your spouse is just realizing now he is leaving and feels like he needs more time than he thought he would. Maybe shortly he won't feel the same and will come sooner, after it sinks in.

I'm sure it depends on the person. My husband was on the plane the next day! He was however getting things settled way before his visa was issued.

It was hard. We were married too. We saw each other more before we got married than after we got married because of the distance. During the 1 year & 3 months of the visa process (we went CR-1), we saw each other twice only - 2 weeks & 1 week.

That's why I went ahead & activate my visa and head back home. I do not know your situation, but it might work for you.

We were married on December 31st of 2003. I didn't see hubster except for 2 weeks at Christmas of 2004 and he didn't arrive here until June 30th of 2005. It was a long tough time and I just wanted him here already, but between his responsibilities and wanting to see everyone before he left, I just really had to accept the month it took for him to get here and realize that we'd be together forever.....except for the 4-8 weeks he spends in the UK every summer... LOL

Married or not, being apart sucks. But it is all unfortunately part of the process and there is a need to be understanding of your husbands needs at this time too. He is leaving his life in his home town life behind to start a life with you, that is not an easy situation!

I think giving him 6 weeks is more than enough. Seriously, when the wait is imposed and theres nothing to do about it, that's one thing. But deliberately waiting and being slow on settling things is another. 6 weeks is very fair. Yes, we have become sick mentally of waiting and to prolong it is not healthy.
I feel though, he will honor your feelings dear, and make it by mid May.


Sending my prayers,
Tammy

I'll agree that it depends as everyone else will. But what most people are not understanding is that Tina and her husband have been on AP for a very long time and comparatively, got a late interview date from filing. I understand this whole heartedly and will say again that 6 weeks is enough.
Tina - yes it is definately a good idea, you gave have several reasonable options.
First of all - this will give a good beginning to a new couple, few hundred$$ is nothing.
Second - Pricing it down is no harm, getting it done is the point.
Third - you even gave him the option of selling it at his desired price and have a family member look at it.

For you Tina, its been a hellish struggle and you even gave him very reasonable options amidst that.
I'm proud of you for keeping such composer.

See till Mid-May if he doesn't budge tell him bluntly you need him to come here. I know what it is like to be split from a husband, it is different when you spent husband wife days together then separated. It hurts. Bad.

By mid May he may have things done, that is what I hope for.

Tammy

If all goes well, P will be approved tomorrow and get his visa next week some time.
But he can't leave Germany until mid-July because he must finish his thesis and get his Diplom or there's no
point in immigrating...he can't get a decent job here without it and he's already put years into it so why leave
when he's this close? So he's got the thesis and three exams to finish. But he's booking the flight as soon as his visa is in hand and saying "it'll have to all get done, won't it?"

We've waited this long (2 years) I don't think it will kill me to wait another 2 1/2 months. He is giving up his country and leaving his family to come here after all.

19 months.

Tina.......CALM DOWN.

I know you want him here like now. I know it is killing you to be apart from him. Men do not think like women, men are more business oriented than we could ever be. Men can not multi-task like women.
The way he is thinking is, let me take care of this property, get rid of it, never have to worry about it again so I can devote all my energies to my life in the US and not be distracted by this past unfinished business. He probably also has this male thing about having set a goal, ie selling the property at a certain price, and will feel he has failed if he does not. Maybe he does not want to place the burden on his family to complete HIS business while he is living the good life in the US.


Right or wrong thinking, it is his thinking. Try to compromise with him is the best i can suggest.

We started planning for my move to the U.S. as soon as we started the K-1 process. We only lived 3 hours away from each other, and saw each other every single weekend through the process, but we wanted me to be able to move to the U.S. as soon as possible after I got my visa.

I moved 6 weeks after getting my visa.

Well.... my husband insha'allah the day it comes will do what he can to be here ASAP. I'll ask him he's also on the boards

Depends. Eh, that's why they allow 6 months from issuance to activation.

I wouldn't use the word "allow." That sounds as if I own him..."You have two weeks before you must report to duty in America!"

But, I'd like my fiance to be here within a couple of weeks of receiving his visa. I'm sure he feels the same way.

I had to work a month's notice and then am taking a final week to finish sorting things out, when you work full time it can be hard to get everything done just on weekends and evenings. So I will be going over 5 weeks after my interview date.

I think it depends on the person and how much they have to settle.

depends how long they had before the apporval to wrap things up.