Joe! I hope so too! Thanks buddy!

Hello good morning/afternoon April
No worries kim!
Just glad to see that you are still positive about this process! Fingers crossed that you will receive your NOA2 this week!

Good luck !

Sorry I just have to post this because I am just feeling really bad.. I was out with some friends last night, and one of my friends husband made the oh so famous comment, "He is only after the green card." Which I am quite used to, but then he threw in the line, "I don't want to be the one to tell you I told you so, after the fact." (it's actually strange I hear this more from men then women) Nice right!! Of course, then it led to me freaking out, and him apologizing, but it makes me feel like then everyone thinks that. Errrrr.. I know when I then call him and tell him (I can't help it), he feels really bad about the whole thing. I just can't wait until this whole process is over and he is actually here with me and everyone can see us together, and even if someone does make that comment to me, at least I have him to turn to.

I'm sure most of you have been through similiar situations, it just erks me, and makes me want to stay home in my little bubble and not say anything to anyone (because it could be that as soon as I turn my back that is what most people are saying).

I hope for all a speedy approval & speedy interview w/ approval!!!

Kristen,

“He who joyfully marches to music in rank and file has already earned my contempt. He has been given a large brain by mistake, since for him the spinal cord would surely suffice.” - Albert Einstein

.... this person knows nothing of your relationship...as I suspect is the case with the rest of the ignorant people who make these remarks to you. They speak only to hear themselves and to make themselves think they sound important. I know it's painful and I know it makes you angry but the comments have no basis other than the bad wrap 'some' have subjected the rest of us to. Perhaps a good comeback would shut it down quick.... 'well that's ok, your wife told me she only married you because she felt badly about the size of your manhood ....and you're still working out fine, aren't you?' ... smile...walk away. Let it take nothing more from you.

I'm so sorry about that, really I am. People who make such comments are really sad. In my particular case, though no one would ever tell Michael I am after a GC, I am actually on the receiving end of comments on a similar line. Since I have a steady, gov't job, a house and assets, some people question the wisdom of my move. I've had a colleague of mine at work ask me if Michael was a reliable person, and how long we had known each other.... Not to mention the attempts at brainwashing I have received, such as people trying to convince me to cling to my job at all costs. I won't go into detail, but other colleagues who've done that have been forced to travel around the world all their lives in order to support a foreign spouse who could not find a steady job in Italy.

I may be old-fashioned, but I like to have a place to stay, though I love travelling on vacation. I know it takes a lot of guts to make a move like that when you are closer to 50 than 40, but I also think that life is not worth living if one never takes any risks in order to improve things. I did when I flew to the US in the fall of 2006 to meet Michael for the first time, and it was the best damn thing I did in my whole life.

Thank you guys for the support, it does feel better to hear all your kind words. It's nice to know that I'm not alone in this. And similiar people are going through similiar situations. I know this is really bad, but when people say mean things I can't help but then second guess my whole relationship. I know I should have a brick wall up, but it just makes me think (OMG can they be right). This goes away, and I couldn't imagine not having him in my life.

I couldn't imagine being on the other end of the stick, and having to leave everything behind to move to somewhere that I knew no one (except of course for my fiance), didn't speak the language, and knowing that everyone was giving him grief about me. It's definitely not the easist situation for him to be getting himself into - but I'm glad that he is!

thanks again!

I've heard it said before that marrying someone in your own country carries about the same risk - what if they're just marrying you because they're a gold-digger? Or just marrying you because of your looks? Superficial marriage of ANY kind isn't just relegated to those who are marrying from another country.

People like that, I've found, are simply so arrogant about the U.S. that they assume ANY person from any country would try a GC scam to get in. Not saying I don't love America, but these people have families, jobs, lives, things that ARE hard to leave behind. They never stop to think that a certain person may just love THEIR country every bit as much as an American loves the U.S., only they love their fiances more and want to be with them. Look at Luis and Suzy - she mentioned that he really doesn't LIKE the idea of leaving Peru. Though I'm sure if I asked 10 people (especially where I'm from), 9 of them would accuse Luis of GC scamming. It's pathetic.

In the end - I think it speaks about the relationship when it requires so much personal sacrifice and literally crossing oceans and borders. Most people, it seems, can't conceive of that kind of commitment. I'd wholeheartedly ignore them all.

Hey girl, I hear ya. I go through the same thing from time to time. You don't need to explain him or yourself to ANYONE. I've realized that a lot of friends of mine were concerned for me - genuinely - and that after I explained it to them they felt better about it. It's gotten a lot better though, but there are some ignorant people (like my dad's family) who I'd rather not even discuss the subject with. They will never get it, because they DONT WANT to get it, and therefore there's no use for me wasting my breath on them.

Most Americans erroneously think we are superior and that our country is superior to all others and that everyone wants to come to the US and will do anything to do so. This is not the case. Luis would have never decided to move here, had it not been for meeting me. I actually was trying to get a teaching job at an American school in Lima Peru (that pays fairly well for being in another country - I probably would have lived better there than in NY), but after begging and begging from my mom and grandma not to take my kids out of the country, I stayed and didn't do it. Luis was pretty disappointed, his family owns a business there and he is very important in the scheme of things, his brother is extremely upset that he will be leaving, but knows it's to be with me and to be happy so he accepts it.

I am not saying that there are not any people who desperately want to come to this country, yes there are. I study Hispanic Languages & Literature Latin American & Carribbean Studies and have done a lot of research on the political and social situations of many countries in the region, and economic inequalities make it necessary for a lot of people to try to leave the country, whether it be to neighboring countries (Chile, Argentina, etc) or to Europe or the US, but that's no reason for people to generalize and stereotype that ALL Latin American people want or need to do so, that's not the case.

I know how irritating that whole line of reasoning can be. I feel like some dp it out of ignorance while they truly care for you and some just to feel superior and hear themselves talk. I think we must remember that we live in a country where we've now been bombarded with the idea that no matter how irrational and unfounded your opinion may be it carries as much weight as reality. We now call that "fair and balanced", whereas it was formerly called "insanity." So many people seem to now feel that asserting ignorant positions as fact is the right thing to do.

I always feel like getting upset is just what they want from me, so I try to do my best to stay calm and not give them the treat they seek. Not that I always accomplish that! Sometimes it is just too much! When someone is attempting to trigger you, it is good to practice a response ahead of time and be prepared. To them it is a game and they have practiced. You should practice as well!

My strategy is to first admit the truth in what they say. "Marriage fraud is a significant issue. One must be very careful...and I was." Then I offer some facts (which you could research about your particular country). Chinese women in America have about the lowest divorce rate of any other group and that statistic contains a majority of new immigrant wives. So, you may wish to marry an American, that's fine, but the chances that your marriage will fail are much greater than mine... if you really want to talk about risks. Then to pretty much end the conversation, "I'm not sure what you know specifically about my fiancee, but please if you know something about her that I don't, I'm all ears."

That is usually followed by red cheeks and a reply that starts with a stammering, "Well, well, well I..." If I'm feeling generous I will let them stammer. If not I will add, "No really, did she try to use you to get a green card? You must tell me!" That usually brings the admission that they know nothing about my fiancee specifically, to which I can say, "Oh so this was a psychic reading you were giving me. You should have said so up front. Really, if I want a psychic reading I'll ask you! At this point you must make your biggest and phoniest smile, then casually move on to the next topic while the psychic reader licks their wounds.

Try it! It's fun.

I am including past 3 years just to be safe

I´ll tell you my point of view, if that helps. I´m the beneficiary and I´m from Brazil. Brazil has lots of problems and America might be a a better place to live in many ways. Lots of brazilians move to the US looking for a better life, and lots of brazilians do the marriage thing for a GC (though the most commom situation is actually paying somebody for marrying them).

But those are usually people who had a hard time in Brazil. I have a bachelor degree (my fiance doesn´t), a wonderful family, lifetime friends, and a comfortable life, a lot more comfortable than I´ll have with Joey on the beggining.

I think in Orlando I´ll be able to get a good salary quicker than I would in Brazil (being just out of school), but I wouldn´t think of moving away from all I know, my country, my parents, my friends, my language, for that.

I wouldn´t give up the dream of living 5 minutes away from my parents and having them see my children anytime they want. I wouldn´t give up walking on the beach with my mom everyday. I wouldn´t give up having my kids go to the same school I went to. I wouldn´t give up having a maid (hahahaha, I know, shallow, but common and cheap in Brazil and hard to get used to not having them). I wouldn´t take the risk of my kids not speaking portuguese and thinking about Brazil as a far away thing. I wouldn´t give up the afternoons laughing and enjoying the intimacy of a lifetime of friendship with my girfriends cause of a little more money. I wouldn´t give up knowing my best friend will be with me in 10 minutes, even if it is 4am if I need her to. I would´t give up my window with a beach view. I would give up brazilian barbecue, beaches, underwear, people, lifestyle, food, night outs, for living in America. I wouldn´t move to a country where people ask me if Brazil is in Africa... or Europe... or don´t even ask, even though they don´t know. I wouldn´t move to a country where most people don´t care about learning about my culture. I wouldn´t cry so very often just thinking of the possibility of never making such good friends as I have here. I wouldn´t be scared with possibilty that my parents are denied a tourist visa to see me. I wouldn´t be scared with the thought that if I ever break up with Joey, I´ll have nothing. I wouldn´t try so hard to move to a country that obviously wish I woulnd´t. I wouldn´t go through that stupid K1 process. I wouldn´t be scared to death when people are rude to me on the embassy. In fact, I wouldn´t take it. I wouldn´t give up family lunches on sundays. I wouldn´t give up calling America a imperialist ###### (hahahahahahah just kidding). I wouldn´t go somewhere I have nothing but ONE person, when here I have everything.
I could go on and on about things I wouldn´t do if it wasn´t for Joey.

I´m sure all the other foreign fiancees will have a list of things they´re not happy to leave, from people they love to everyday silly things that do make a difference.

So if we ever hear anybody say we´re after a GC, we can kick their butt!!!!

I´m sure there have being people who married a GC... But I think the risk the us citizen is taking is as big as the risk the foreign is taking, leaving everything behing.

Fernanda.. my life here in America sounds a lot like your life there in Brazil. I'm sorry you will missing all of that... I can only imagine how difficult that will be for you. This is the main reason Russell is moving here but we honestly hope to live in both Countries at some stage. Maybe that will be an option sometime in the future for you as well.

btw.. I know where Brazil is.
Once you've become acclimated to the US, I think you'll find that we're not all imperialist ####. You will make some good friends, i'm sure.

Fernanda's post moved me quite a bit... To be perfectly honest, if I may say so, I even felt a bit envious. I really wish I could feel the same about my own country, instead of looking forward to leaving everything behind as I am. The only thing I will probably miss is my hometown of Rome... As noisy, crowded and messed up as it is, I love it to death, and it is the only place in Italy where I would live (I did live elsewhere, in a smaller town, and I swore to myself, never again).

As I wrote some time ago, here I have almost nothing left. I live in a very big flat which used to be my family home, and now is full of memories of a life that is gone forever. My brother has cut me off because of his wife's meddling, and I haven't seen or heard from them for over four months (they live in Rome too). As much as I resent the whole visa process, I know it is nothing in comparison to other things that have happened to me in the past. However, I really wish I would feel a little bit like Fernanda does... I wish I had at least one lifetime friend to leave behind, or some family member younger than 81. That makes me feel like such a failure... I will be 48 next December, and will probably leave nothing behind me. Sometimes I wonder what Michael sees in me that no one else did... I wonder if one day he won't open his eyes and realise he made a mistake.

Sorry for being so morbid, but sometimes it all gets a bit too much... I hope you understand.

Raffaella, you really shouldn't be so hard on yourself: not everyone comes from a picture postcard backround. You think you're the only one that comes from a disfucntional family!!?? Trust me, my situation is markedly similar to yours. You're not a failure. I'd bet my bottom dollar that you've been totally your own person all your life, have never "followed the crowd" just to fit in. That can leave you pretty isolated at times, but that's a damn site better than selling yourself out just to aspire to tbe he kind of social animal you sometimes think you should be. But you don't sell yourself out - you're true to you. Perhaps Michael can see that too. And perhaps he's drawn to you for just that reason. Ever thought about that?

The overtly social lifestyle isn't for everyone. And there's nothing wrong with that. Nothing at all. Sporting events aside, give me the quiet life any day of the week.

Erm, that's it really!!

Chin up, girl!!!

Highway, may I call you highway? Your story is very sad in some ways. I want to tell you that many times I have had the opportunity to have someone come up to me in the grocery store and say, "Remember me? You were my doctor when I was a kid and one day you said to me (fill in the blank) and I've never forgotten it. It really helped me get my life together."

Most of the time it was something that I didn't think was so profound. Sometimes, it was just that I was the first adult who listened and respected them. I think I have been very lucky to have these experiences and I firmly believe that we all touch people like this sometimes, but often we never get the feedback. Little things can make a big difference. Some child you passed in Roma one day may have seen their first happy, smiling adult face stuck to the front of your head and thought, "Maybe the world isn't as ugly as it seems at home. Maybe there is hope for the future." Some little kindness may have changed someone's life forever.

As humans, our limited access to data (feedback) can easily lead us to draw incorrect conclusions. Our vision is very limited at times and we fail to see the truth of what we have contributed to the world. We may think we see failure but we don't know how far the effects of our small actions may have traveled.

So remember all the small things, the kind words, the helping hand, the respect you've shown to people who feel oppressed, and on and on. Remember that all these things have had effects far from you, that you may never know about. You put them out there into the world and your kindness and compassion spread. I'm not unique. I'm just lucky to have heard from some of these people and I'm just here to tell you that your little actions have been no less powerful than mine.

Your neck gets tired fast when you hang "failure" around it. It isn't true so let that go and give yourself the credit you deserve.

nice post!

Here is the rundown on Igor's list going into the week of August 11...
(at least up to my spot at 65, sorry to be so selfish)

#2 repeat, subtract 1

#5 approved already, subtract 2

#22 very sad...pregnant, broke up, she is withdrawing petition ,subtract 3

#28 didn't indicate service center in profile, is posting in CSC forum, I think it's a CSC case, subtract 4

#42 duplicate, subtract 5

#44 "Russ & Kim", pornography related delays

#48 Gaura & Nitai, already approved, subtract 6

#50 Suzy & Luis, VSC awaiting nude photos of Peruvian supermodel "Luis"

#56 Want to know what slows things down? Professional petitioners maybe? This person wonders if he'll have any trouble...applied for K1 in 2006, approved but he was unhappy with product on delivery and returned to sender. Applied for same person Jan 2007 had interview appt in June, canceled 2 weeks before interview because he had decided to "date" someone else Apparently the product quality had not improved in the intervening 6 months! Now applying for her a third time! My my, what will happen this time?! Anyone else who has been through this situation please run over and tell him what to expect!

Did someone say something about dysfunction? Of course, you can see this is a new paragraph so the question has nothing to do with anything written above!

Joe - Wow - some of this reads like a freaking soap opera! On a side note, duplicates drive me nuts....

Kim, taking a looksee at igor's list once again I noticed that 2 4/23 dated peeps are approved and then, well, there's us. I hope the adjudicator had a wonderful and restful vaca and will be back in an approving mood!!! [notice I'm still holding onto the vacation theory]

I've been bouncing back and forth in the #43 and #44 spot for days and couldn't figure it out. But I guess when new people add in timelines you can move backward.

And to end, sort of after the point, about the whole being used for a green card thing. I usually look whomever in the eye and say "yes he is, and I'm just using him for the sex". That usually quiets them down. Then again most people who are acquaintences of mine would never think a comment like that would ever come out of my mouth so it's totally disarming to them.

Great response! Based on the country listed for your fiance you might want to lift an eyebrow at the end and say "Kama Sutra!" very loudly! Maybe tell them you are just up to the chapter on biting, so you need to bring him here to finish. It's a long book! Namaste!

What lovely responses! I couldn't agree more.



omg!



good God! wth is wrong with people!?!

Thanks for the update Joe!



Hi Milo! I was mistaken the other day ..what Russell told me was that about half of the 4/23 NOA1's have been approved...forgot how many there were. I'm still with you on the vacation theory... guess we'll find out soon.



thata girl! There is certainly something to be said about shock value!



you are a nut!

Hey china it wasn`t me applying for her, it was someone else. I wouldn`t go through this process more than once.

oooops!

Sorry dude! I hope it's all figured out now. Sorry for misunderstanding your post! Hope you have a smooth ride.

hahahhahaha

Joe, I just loved your other post. You rock! I've had similar experiences having been an elementary school teacher. It is really a special gift to get that feedback many, many years later. We all touch lives when do the simplest things, and often never even know it.

Your neck gets tired fast when you hang "failure" around it. <-----Love that!

Thanks ! im glad im not that stupid, lol

This cracked me up ... that's why you've been obsessively checking off everyone on the Igor-list? lol *cheeks turn red, I've done the same thing and constated that there are probably 15/20 petitioners who lacked updating *

Quick question- we are in the process of getting our co-sponsors to fill out the I-134 and get it notarized as well as notarize copies of their tax records/bank statements etc...

They will need to get the same things notarized in about 2 months when I file for AOS- so just wondering, can they just get two copies done NOW and notarized so all they have to fill in is the I-864 for me when the time comes? Or would the previous copies of letters of employment etc not be accepted because they are from a different date to the date of the I-864?

Must be us upstate NYers who need something to obsess about!

Darn upstate NYers. Isn't it funny that for city / Long Island people, upstate NY is like going to another planet?

I remember my first trip up to Albany when I was looking at colleges, and I was like "we're still in New York????" Totally strange. Love you guys though, you're so laid back and nice. We're kinda wound real tight down here. Still love Lon' Giland though, haha.

KIM!!!! I got a touch! He is back, and tan, and happy and ready to approve us all!!!!

Ok, maybe he's a she and she actually was at some sort of weird family reunion or something. Or on a cruise for single women who love their cats too much....

Fingers crossed!

Good Monday morning April.... so, milo... is today the day????

Gaura, I have no idea if it's ok or not. Sorry. Perhaps check in the AOS forum? I would have to think that if you're going to adjust status soon enough it wont be a problem. good luck.

You guys are funny.... I was taking apart Igor's list before I even filed ...so perhaps it's more a North East kinda thing? You're so right tho, upstate is a whole other world than NYC or LI!

Well i'm hoping for good things today. Have tons to do but i'm quite sure i'll be checking my email like a mad woman. Have a great day folks.

edit: OMGOMGOMGOMGOMGOMG

Such a blessed first day of the week !!1 First day of having more approvals comming!! Im still praying and hoping for more approvals this week!!Common VSC send more..more...more...!!!

God bless!!!

Such a blessed first day of the week !!1 First day of having more approvals comming!! Im still praying and hoping for more approvals this week!!Common VSC send more..more...more...!!!

God bless!!!

Is somebody talking about me again??? Nope, because the cruise part doesn't fit.

KIM!!! I dreamed about you last night. Good sign, eh? Slumber vibes~~~ for you. It was one of those wacko, all over the place dreams. Being with Nick in some city, maybe San Antonio, riding a bicycle through a scary part of town looking for Nick. Watching a parade. Then going to a party at your house. Russ was there and we chatted but he couldn't get out of the lawn chair. There were lots of people. You were floating around talking to everybody. Each time I saw you, I told you "I've just gotta hug you." Then I woke up because Nick called from the UK. I was very groggy with a headache. Guess I drank too much at your party.

Good luck and DO IT this week. Get that darn NOA2.

Gaura--You seriously DO NOT have to notarize the evidence like tax forms, bank statements, letters. The only thing that is notarized is your signature on the back page of the I-134. I was in the London Embassy 10 days ago and they did not question any documents and did not even look at bank statements.

Highwaystar>>

I am so happy for you getting approved!!!! Congrats!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!


I guess we really did become one of the last March filers who haven't got approved.
My fiance is here in Japan and I am thinking of having him make a call to USCIS.
They will probably tell him that we are still within the processing time.
I know that we may be, but we are definitely one of the few couples who haven't got approved.

Can anyone give us some advise how we should talk to USCIS people on the phone??
Should we simply ask them what is going on with our case or should we be a little be demanding??

I am really getting depressed now.....

Nich! Hmmmmmmmmmmmm I like to analyze my dreams ..must be the shrink in me ... it's so funny that you see me floating around chatting with everyone. Doesn't sound like me at all. Oh and i'm SUCH a hugger!!! Not sure about Russell not getting out of the lawn chair. Guess we'd been making up for all the lost time!? I'm surprised I wasn't singing!

Boy am I glad i'm not going to the doctor's for my blood pressure check today!

S&D, I think about you all the time when i'm feeling so down about our wait. Your fiance can call but honestly he's probably just going to get the standard nonsense or some misinformation that will just stress you out more. If I was to venture a guess, i'd say you're in the same box as Raff and with an obnoxiously slow adjuticator!!! Perhaps an email to your fiance's representative? It's unfathomable to me that they are approving May while some from March are still waiting. I do so hope you hear some good news today!!!

Best of Luck n God Bless!!..U will have Good news by end of this week..Keep the Faith

Help!!!

My fiance just received the 3rd package wich tells him all the forms he needs to fill out and send back but one apendix is missing , the medical that contains all the instructions....
What should I do???

Thanks everyone!

Sandra

Call the embassy and ask them about that info.
Most of them time the embassy website will have all the packet 3 online, with all the info you will need listed.

We're APPROVED!!!!!

*** DO NOT RESPOND TO THIS E-MAIL ***

The last processing action taken on your case

Receipt Number: XXXXXXXXXXX

Application Type: I129F , PETITION FOR FIANCE(E)

Current Status: Approval notice sent.

On August 11, 2008, we mailed you a notice that we have approved this I129F PETITION FOR FIANCE(E). Please follow any instructions on the notice. If you move before you receive the notice, call customer service.

If you have questions or concerns about your application or the case status results listed above, or if you have not received a decision from USCIS within the current processing time listed*, please contact USCIS Customer Service at (800) 375-5283.

Kim - you are next!!!

omg I can't breathe! Oh please let us be next! ...ok, or you S & D.

Congratulations Milo... it's been fun sharing this ride with you..but not that much!

Congrats Milo.

INTRA: I know the anger you feel, I have had to keep my self from unloading also. I think most of the anger comes from realizing this person does not respect you enough to think your discussions are sound. I many times wish to scream , do you think I am really that stupid? It also hurts a lot when every day you wait, and your Fiancee also waits and you see the pain in each others eyes when video conferencing. And to have a friend not understand that pain and be so obtuse as to feel the need to warn you about a green card just sets you off.

Alyona has also run into the same type of thing in the Ukraine. An acquaintance accused her of only wanting me for money.


Dale

Just heard from the Embassy - they just said I only need 2 years of tax returns and I don't have to get the affidivat notarized. I have that all in writing so I will print out the Email. But I will still get it notarized just in case... you never know.........

Sending really HUGE vibes to Kim&Russ and S&D.... I want so very much to celebrate with you, who have been so sweet, patient and understanding with me during my own wait! And congrats to the new approvals as well!

The week didn't start in the best of ways, because I learned that my 84-year-old aunt (my dad's only surviving sibling) is in hospital. It doesn't seem to be anything serious, but at that age you never know... probably something heat-related. Obviously no one had bothered to tell me anything... I called her on her cellphone when I couldn't find her at home all day yesterday, and she told me. I was so shocked! She lives in Southern Italy, some 300 km south of Naples, so it's not easy for me to jump on a train and go visit her. Hopefully she'll be sent back home soon.

The whole thing filled me with sadness, as if another piece of my old life was slowly fading away... I hope she'll pull through this, but at that age she won't live forever, and she is very much alone (though luckily she has means). Thinking of her, alone in a hospital bed, during this week when most people are on vacation (not me though), really gets me down... Thank heavens Michael understands and supports me fully.

Damn, I'm not even at the VSC and I wish they'd hurry up and approve Kim and Russ.

Nice people deserve good things.

Congrulation Milo.!!.. ...Wooohoo..Rock n Roll.. its Party time..

Kim - you are next!!! R u Ready...?..Ofcourese.. YEs.. .
U been touched today?..or not .. check it out.
Milo n U were same day filer.U should have it by this week.Good Luck to u...