To make a long story short, I want her sent back asap. I dont have the money to send her back right away. I dont feel that she deserves even an extended vacation here at the costs that this has already brought to me. Its going to be two months before I can get a ticket for her to go back. Can I just call immigration and they come and get her? Maybe they can bill me? What can I do to get her on a plane back to her home country as soon as possible???

i dont even have words to describe the disgust.

As far as ICE and USCIS are concerned, she has 90 days, period. If you want her gone sooner and she's willing to get on a plane, then how to manage the ticket purchase is entirely up to you. Perhaps a load could be arranged.

hee.... hahaha ! no offense but a fiancee or a wife is not like a rat and you call the exterminators to get rid of it !
first, give us some more info, are you married, did you file for aos etc ?

If you are, you can file for a divorce
If you are not, just don't file any aos etc. i guess it should stop all procedures.

But damn.....

Yeah, I really hope that this is all a joke.

I was deceived into this. I have seen enough cases where the petitioner was basically used so I took steps to verify. I have chat logs where she communicated her true feelings to the people back home. So I have been lied to for well over a year. So I have a right to my feelings about this. Thank you for
your answers... apparently im stuck for 90 days and she can have a vacation, which is what she planned all along. She has a relative coming from another state and they are going off together to have a good time... Well I guess I dont have to pay for any ticket back either...

i understand how sucky it might feel, i guess the best is just for yourself to move on and to let her do whatever she wants with her friends, i don't think it's necessary to have vengence or anything, She is putting herself in that situation and will face the consequences on her own.
You didn't anwer about if u were already married, so the situation might be different.

Perhaps K1 are not the best in your case (i saw it was your second in another thread).

No offenses either but thoses cases are i think expected when for example you have 25 yrs difference or someone really heavy with a tiny young adult all cute and fancy from poorer countries.

I do not know what is your situation.

I saw some picts on the gallery that sometime..... i wonder about the honnesty of all that.

seriously !!!!!!
sometime, there is case... you wonder !!!!

Most (regular) people just look for a little love and hope for the best. It's human ...

You aren't sending back bad food at a diner...THIS IS A HUMAN BEING FOR GOD'S SAKE!!!!!
You make me sick.

let her deport herself.
she will find out one day, if she doesnt know now, that she cannot adjust status, get a job, no SSN, drivers license...and become a non-person.

From the O/P "How can I send her back"...

WTF-this isn't a defective DVD player!!! You can't just "send back" and there is NO warranty period! WTF do you think YOU are????

Ok, the relationship has gone bad...and YOUR reaction [ and main concern, seemingly] is " send her back..." damn....wtf?

Well, that could be argued. Apparently, the OP believes she is a bad apple. OP, if you have chat logs that she has deceived you in order to gain residency, save them, and make contact with ICE to inform them that you will not be proceeding with her immigration process, for reasons as detailed in the attached chat logs.



She has used him for residency purposes. It is his right to make sure she does not deceive the US government or any other person, no?

Well, he's within his rights to take steps with that in mind but the "making sure" is going to be up to the authorities. He can't force her to leave. Only his actions are under his control, not hers or those of the authorities.

That's messed up !

Yes, indeed. The "making sure" was in reference to him exercising his right and to some extent his obligation to alert ICE of her malintentions, if he she has been so foolish to put them to paper. What will be done from that point in is in ICE's hands.

I wonder about that also.

Why did you petition her if you can't even afford a ticket for her return? Petitioning a Foreigner cost lots of money, as Petitioner YOU are responsible for taking care of her needs while she is in America. If a Guy can't afford to take care of her basic needs, then he shouldn't petition her.

This is exactly what my reaction was when I first read this topic, but I later read the OP's second post and I changed my opinion. IF what the OP is saying is true and his fiancee has deceived him in order to gain entry into this country, then she is the one who should be labeled 'sick' and 'disgusting'. People like that are the exact reason why so many of us here are having to endure the emotional hardships that we are.

If true, then not only did she commit fraud, but did so with a total disregard for the feelings of another human being. I would hope that she would be prosecuted to the fullest extent of the law and permanently banned from entering the US again. I can't imagine how I would feel if I found out that my fiancee had been lying to me all along.

All we know about this case is what little the OP has chosen to tell us, so, I will refrain from making any judgements.

To the OP: If this is your second K1 gone bad, please, try to learn from your mistakes. You are making us all look bad.

Man, I see an awful lot of hatred beig spewed in this topic. The "moral superiority" of some of these repliers makes me want to vomit! People's you dont know the situation. The guy is asking for info. Is that not what this board is for? Check all that "judgemental attitude" at the damn door!

-Samby

I agree too (still the ... how can i send her back wasn't so smart....)

[/quote]
All we know about this case is what little the OP has chosen to tell us, so, I will refrain from making any judgements.
[/quote]
Well said.

Sorry but I'm unable to do that.
This site IS personal....I can't be supportive and just say "Sorry about your luck!" when I feel so strongly on a subject.
It sucks this happened and I agree...if she really did do this, shame on her.
If not, well the rest speaks for itself.

I agree with CraigCam as well.
At first this was all the information I had and I reacted to it, then I saw the second post about the scam, etc.
Still, no matter what this person has done, they are still a human being, you can't just ship her back like she's damaged merchandise you ordered from a store, doesn't work that way.

How does it work, Laura? The issue is that if she has conned an American citizen to gain entry to this country, how would you propose to reverse the situation? Do you believe she should remain?

I don't know what should be done, I don't think she can be "sent back" and him possibly get billed for it later.
It just seems so...cold.
Have they talked about it?
How about open communication?
How about finding out the truth instead of simply relying on seeing some chat logs to friends.
The OP has given such little information, perhaps I shouldn't have commented but it upset me to see those words.
Until the OP comes back with further information I'll just keep my mouth shut.
I guess it boils down to me not understanding how people can ask someone to marry them when they hardly know them at all.

I am being a devil's advocat now, I know, but do you really think that an individual that is so cold-hearted as to deceive another person into falling in love with her and taking the steps to and bring her to another country to marry, would actually tell the "truth" if confronted?

I could perhaps accept your position if this was a case of hearsay or a suspicion, but information conveyed in chat logs to friends is hard to overlook, no? Talk about a smoking gun....

It doesn't SEEM cold Lau, it IS cold.
But some folks on VJ seem to think that you can dispose of foreign peoples like you discard old socks -- more power to them.
"Can they bill me for it?" I'm sorry man, but your language is more telling than what you tell us she has done.
Peace out.

This is ridiculous! The OP suggested that he didn't have the money right now. He isn't shirking his repsonsibility. Give him some slack, people!

And if it is true that this woman deceived him into a relationship for immigrant benefit alone, she is breaking immigration law. Does she deserve more consideration that the "host" or "victim" she preyed upon?

I'm sorry mermaid my friend, but in my world people are NOT disposable. If the OP thinks they are, well, certainly I'll agree to disagree.
I have no pity for her either but I don't know her side of the story and am not about to take the OP's word for gospel when it's filled with bad vibes and thinking that his former fiance (or now spouse or whatever) is like a broken DVD player. If that's the way he thinks.... well...

I am not passing judgment on the alien or the OP, but I am interested in the visceral responses. What I am interested in is knowing where the threshhold lies? If a DVD player is "broken" we have no issue with returning it to the store. We have come to "expect" it to perform. If someone preys upon another, are they not a "broken" person?

Mermaid, if you're looking for an argument you chose the wrong person. I gave -and sustain- my opinion on the matter; and if you or anyone else does not like it, that is not my problem. I don't have to explain my responses to you or anyone else.
Peace out, L.

This entire case makes me kind of sick and it is horrible that such a thing could happen. We of course do not know the story.

All I can say is sorry that is horrible. Hopefully you can find a solution. Borrow some money from a friend or relative to buy a plane ticket. Discuss matters with the individual in an adult kind way.

Thats all I have to say.

[/quote] I am not passing judgment on the alien or the OP, but I am interested in the visceral responses. What I am interested in is knowing where the threshhold lies? If a DVD player is "broken" we have no issue with returning it to the store. We have come to "expect" it to perform. If someone preys upon another, are they not a "broken" person?
[/quote]

I think the bottom line is simple, if the petitioner believes that he has been duped, then does he have an obligation to report the nature of the dishonesty to the respective authorities?

I guess someone would have to read the chat logs and make that determination on their own, we cannot suppose what the authorities will do with the information. As was stated above, he has to make the decision whether he is going to report her or not. If he can come up with money for a ticket, then that is an action he is going to have to decide to take. He cannot force her onto a plane however.

I would rather avoid the discussion of whether a person is disposable or not, or whether a person can be compared to a defective object.

The facts that we know are:

1) Its illegal to come to the US under false pretenses
2) The petitioner's feelings for the beneficiary have changed
3) The petitioner would like the beneficiary to leave

His options are fairly simple in my opinion:

1) Call the authorities, and let them handle their business
2) Contact immigration and tell them that he no longer supports this petition
3) Discuss his concerns with her, and request that she leave on her own. Provide a copy of the documents, and perhaps read over them together to clarify anything that might be misconstrued (sounds like its pretty obvious though).

To me, all of the above are things that he should do. But perhaps if he does #3 first, this may solve a few of his problems sooner than later (she may just leave). Trying to do things through the back door in my life experience always take longer and create more hardship.

If what he has stated is true and feels completely lied to, even if the logs are not reflective of what he feels they are, this relationship is doomed. If his first reaction wasn't to confront her with the evidence, and discuss it like a true fiancee would, then the relationship doesn't have a solid foundation to begin with. A house built on sand. . . .

"I can't?" Of course you can. Nobody is forcing anybody to hit the reply button and start typing. Let's stick to the topic please, not the people posting. If you can't check the personal judgments at the door, stay outside the door.

Follow your own advice Sir Push.- you seem to be taking an "I will show you how to post/behave/think attitude. Could you leave that outside the door please? And stick to the topic?

My on topic replies are already posted.

The people who are doing this don't really have any conscious at all. It'll come back to haunt them.

Life is full of hardships. We must remember that too. Hopefully this person can find a solution and find some peace.

I have seen couples like you're describing above.. here.. both usc. Some people like older men/women and some ppl like some "curves" lol
No offense, I get what youre saying but....come on!

Amen. you have spoken wisely Dave.

his words were harsh but his point was valid

She has spent a year playing with his emotions and using his money, why should he not want to send her back...all she did was use him for an entry into the US.

Should she get to stay here because she lied and deceived a man for a year? Should her lies gain her admission to our country? What else did she lie about? Now that she is here if she disappears it may be years before immigration finds her.

Wow a free stay in the US and the honest ppl can't get their SOs here and you wonder why he wants to send her back?

I don't think anybody is proposing to put her out with the garbage. I don't think asking somebody to return home is considered "disposing of". The K-1 visa/AOS process is long, tedious, and somewhat costly when it's all added up. There has to be some mutual trust and honor among the people involved. It's almost like a contract or a pact. If one party breaks the pact, the whole thing is void.

Personally, if I was lied to and deceived for over a year and learned the truth once she arrived here, she would be on the next plane back home. And buying that ticket would be the best money I'd have ever spent. It would be done purely out of revenge and anger, but I have no problem with that.

And to those of you who want to say "who do you think you are?" ...... I'm the guy who brought her over here thinking she really loved me, only to be made to look like a fool. I don't know about anybody else, but I don't let people take advantage of me and get away with it.

good luck

ok thanks for the many responses... I will give you the details... I met my fiance in october of 2006 in person.
So it has been much more than 16 months that she has lied to me. To address the age issue. I was apprehensive about the age difference and I thought that was something we had talked about enough that I was ok with it. NO i am not an old perv looking for that. I am a person like anyone else who wants to love someone and be loved in return. If you want more information, I have a medical condition that makes sexual activity low on my list of things to do. I have had diabetis for several years and had this condition a long time without treatment. One of the affects of this condition is erectile dysfunction, so Im not motivated by sex. I have a very low sex drive. My fiance broke up with me about three months into our relationship. I wasnt happy about that. I heard she had a boyfriend and I confronted her about that and she said it wasnt serious. Well I moved on and then a month or so after that she asked me to take her back. I did take her back, but I was very skeptical. I asked her hundreds of times did she really love me? I told her to just be honest with me and I would help her. I could help her get a work visa as she has a skill that is in demand in the usa.

So I have sent money not only to her but for the support of her family for the last 12 months since we got back together. When she arrived here she treated me as a "friend" I went to kiss her simply goodnight the first night, as i know she had a long flight and she would not even kiss me. I ask how is it that someone loves you and they wont kiss you? She said to give her time. Well ok... maybe so.. but I think there would be some level of affection. I recorded
the chat as I have already said, and she clearly tells her friends that she doesnt love me and also that she doesnt even intend to marry me? It seems she thought she could come here and just get a job. She doesnt seem to understand
the process at all. After a lot of talking, I finally got her to admit that she does not love me and that just came here to work and to help her family.

So I guess I have to spend some more money to send her back. She got me to believe that she really loved me even though my gut feeling told me that she didnt. Lesson to be learned i guess. My fault in this as it has been pointed out that this is my second k-1 visa, is that quite honestly i am a lonely person and I have set myself up for these problems. I have to work on myself and use much better judgement in the future. I am too willing to believe someone because I want to be in a happy loving relationship. So yes Im pretty stupid..

Im not concerned with contacting immigration.. When I posted this earlier, I was just frustrated and wanted this behind me. Ive had a lot of expenses lately and problems. My income qualified to bring her here. I just have to get caught up a little bit. I do love her, and Im mostly just very sad. It is because that I was burned on a previous k-1 fiance, that I have been much more willing to see the truth for what it is. Its possible to let love overlook things in hopes that it will get better. Im happy that im healthy enough now to just face the truth and the facts and take appropriate action. I am not vengefal. I dont wish her any harm or bad things. I just want to focus on things I have to do. Im upset that this has caused me to burn my second k-1 visa. I love the culture of her people and I love the people of her country. Someday I will move there. I wish her the best, but I want to get this over with and thats why I posted that like I did.

thanks for listening

You don't have to pay for her return flight. She will get deported, which is free of charge to you.

More importantly, though, don't be vengeful or anything. Just try to keep your spirits up.. And for what it's worth, don't head for the K-1 route any more, as you've discovered that might not be a good fit for you. Just work on being satisfied with being independent for now, and let pieces fall into place later if they may. Perhaps you can even work on your health issues and start improving physically, just to feel better about yourself as well... I wish you the best.

CORRECT!!!!

No offense to you, Jesse G, but given the current illegal immigration situation, what makes you think ICE will actually deport her? Solid evidence of fraud will open an investigation, but as she hasn't yet incurred any real immigration benefits (K-1 means nothing if unmarried and I-94 is expired), but he says he's not interested in contacting immigration. And deportation may be "free of charge" to the petitioner, but it's not the taxpayers.

If the OP is willing to buy a plane ticket for her to go back, I say go for it.