I've been living abroad more than 10 years. I met my husband in China, where I currently live, but he is from West Africa. We were married three years ago and had a daughter over a year ago. We started thinking about immigrating after she was born, and had planned to file with the embassy in Benin. I spoke to someone there about filing through Benin even though I didn't live there. Filing in China, chances were it would take us several years. Meanwhile, my husband can't find work here so is living in Benin.
The person I spoke to in Benin said there should be no problem. I could file, have an interview, etc. during my visit last summer, and we expected my husband to get his visa last fall. We had planned to join him this summer. However, when I got to Benin last summer with all the paperwork done, I found that the embassy there was no longer allowed to accept petitions.
We sort of gave up on the idea of immigrating until our daughter reached school age. We thought my husband would join us in China in the fall, but one thing after another happened and by December I had to make a decision if I would sign another contract or not. My husband had not yet returned to China and it was killing me that he was missing so much of our daughter's life. I decided not to seek contract renewal. Now I'm just a few months from returning to the US and there is so much to do. Filing our I-130 is just one thing. I have years of life to pack up and a job to find. Meanwhile I'm still working and living as a single-mom.
I've been really stressing about how long it would take for my husband to be able to join us. Being a single-mom in China where I can afford someone to come to my home to care for my daughter, where I pay no rent, where I can afford to have someone clean my house, wash my clothes, etc., and being a single-mom in the US are very different things. And I feel like I'm growing apart from my husband. He kept saying he would come visit us, but I didn't think we should spend the money for his flight since we are going to have so many more expenses when I move home. Then suddenly it occurred to me that he could stay until his I-94 ran out, six months if his last visits are anything to go by, and he could even keep our daughter during the day while I'm at work. That would be one expense we wouldn't have, so the cost of his air ticket would be covered.
Now I'm just deciding whether to file before I return to the US or wait until after he arrives. I've asked the question about whether or not he might be denied entry because I've filed. There is also the issue of addresses and address changes. If I file now, will I have to change my address on my form when I get home, etc. And really, as long as I'm abroad, I think I'm supposed to file with the embassy in the country where I live, but by the time the petition is processed I'll no longer be in that country and my husband isn't from that country and doesn't live there, etc., etc., etc.
I'm rambling now and I only have a few minutes for lunch, so I'll run along. But that's my story so far. I'm so glad I found this site because there are so many details that you just can't learn from uscis.gov.