Sending you prayers. this is a hurtful thing. some how I hope you find some peace and you can heal.

there are many many members on this board who are 'lit up like candles' who don't 'flame' or engage in 'flaming'.....blue dots and hearts are indeed only an indication of amount of postings....and they are achieved thro lots of ways, not only in this way.....

Hope the OP works his problem out....

Thinking of you, Robert, and hoping you're doing alright.

PS...right on Becca, Peggy, and some of the others. M. (and Welshie's post above..also agree)

if you play the VJ dictionary game you will earn hearts or the other games and you too wont be stuck at 4 or 5 blue dots!

You tell em Welshie...

Robert.. we still worrying about you and hope you being away for so long means something is being resolved...

Hope he is busy documenting !

hey anyone know why this thread was moved to Off Topic??

and still nobody's heard from Robert??? I really hope hes ok

I see it under "Moving and your new life in America"

yea i just realized that... guess it was moved FROM off topic... but still i wonder why?

edit: i just checked and saw that robert was last active today... wonder why he hasnt updated this thread? maybe he cant find it..

Sorry, to have read about your situation Robert. I suggest you inform INS immediately in writing about what's happening before she makes any move to discredit you . Before you confront her ,You can print all of these e-mails as proofs to back you up just incase you would need these in the future.
Good luck..
God Bless

I am back from Disneyland, I saw some suggest we go. I had booked the trip before Johanna got here. The email activity has slowed. I figured we needed to spend some time alone together to fall in love again. It has been a difficult road when I know more than I should. I am takinging it day by day and being very careful. I thank you for all your on topic thoughts and advice. I will contiune to update the saga as I know more.

Being Careful in Seattle

Robert

thanks for the up-date robert..my best to you..dean

How cruel, Robert I hope things work out.

Thanks for letting us know how you're doing, Robert... despite some people's opinions, most of us have been very concerned for you, even if it has been in the background. I think we all feel a bit vulnerable when we hear stories like this. "But for the grace of God go I..."

Consider all of the relevant advice and do what your heart tells you to do.

And feel free to start a new thread when you are ready to let us know how things are going.... we'll be waiting.

Peace, Jen

Robert, please come back to keep us updated on your situation.. If you need anything, let us know:)

I hope before you marry, you get some kind of resolution.

Take care of yourself and wishing you all the best in this matter.

Mary

Robert,

Email activity "slowing" might feel like a step in the right direction for you, but to an outsider whose vision is not influenced by strong emotional bonds, "email activity has ceased. And all explanations and apologies offered" would be the step you should be looking for. Giving someone a second chance is admirable...but a word to the wise...While you are trying to repair the breach of trust, be watchful of behaviourisms and "look with your brain" not with your heart. Best of luck.

Robert... I'm still praying for you... and wishing you the best. Let God lead you in the steps that you need to take.
Lynne

All good wishes Robert - I hope you get the end result you hope for but either way I wish you all the very best for the future

Nope its legal, as long as its his computer, and its in his home...yup its legal.

Well put. If this were to happen to me, I would never be able to trust her again. I would always try to second guess and think the worst about everything she says and does. Unfortunately, this kind of thing is like a slow acting poison.

Good luck with whatever decision you make.

Not to be mean, but I don't think you are thinking with your brain. You have been used for entry to the U.S. and you are holding onto a hope that is not there. I don't intend for this post to be anything but an outside view looking objectively at the facts. You have been used and should not allow it to continue. You will not find lasting happiness in this situration.

Wow this is a shite situation for ANY human being to be in, i'm so sorry.

I actually cryed when i read your post......((hugs))

I dont know you but i hope so bad that you get your situation sorted out.

Please do take care of yourself sweetie, but please keep an eye out for things that may trigger any feelings this is still happening, i think it would be much worse if you found out it was happening after you married your lady.

Yes, Robert, just please be careful.

My first husband was a cheater. Big time. I forgave but the trust was never there again. The words 'slow acting poison' used above are so appropriate. And deceit can take so many forms - it's not just about affairs. A person who hides things will behave that way about many issues - money, family matters, even goals or desires. After my ex gave up other women, he shifted his deceit to money. Just as a cheater can blame the innocent spouse by saying 'he or she didn't satisfy my emotional/physical needs' a liar will blame the important people in their lives for their own insecurities not being met as well. Believe it or not, a skilled manipulator can make you feel like it's you that is to blame.

Please tred wisely.

disneyland is always a great way to repair a relationship!

Hell! If doing and saying the right things to someone guarantees and secures me a fully paid trip to a place I've never been to before, I'd do them in a heartbeat, even moreso if I was an immigrant in the US for the very first time!

Good luck to you Robert and yes be cautious but only you know what is right for you

Adele