Full Version: We are thinking about not getting rings....
VisaJourney.com > Marriage Based Immigration (K1, K2, K3, etc) to the USA > IR-1 / CR-1 Spouse Visa General Discussion
My finace and I are thinking about not exchanging rings at our Jamaican wedding. Our plan has always been to have a small wedding (read inexpensive) in Jamaica for his family and have a second larger wedding once he is in the states. He is concerned that when he goes for his interview they may think less of the marriage because we didn't exchange rings--- we can't afford what we really want right now and I don't see the point in spending money on rings that we don't really love. Any thoughts?
We're just like you guys. For the ring issue he got a simple silver band and I got a simple white gold band. It feels good for now and when we can we'll upgrade.
If you are worried about it why not get a very cheap one to wear temporarily ? $ 9.95 
Hey girl,
Some people have mix feelings about this (if he wears the ring to the interview). We did the same thing (exchanged rings) he has a band and I have an engagment ring. We had an engagement party, which I knew nothing about. He told me I was going to meet his mom, dad and brothers and when I got to their house he had the whole FAMILY--- they came from all of the ISLAND...some even flew in from Caymans. I was at a loss for words. I told him I wanted somthing PRIVATE and well, I couldn't even speak. Then he started to cry and that did me in. My cousins's fiance who got approved last year (wore his wedding band to his interview) and yes, they did question him about it...(DAMN EDIOT kept on playing with it while she was going through his paperwork)-- she was done with the questioning and was about to tell him he was approved. She asked him if they got married and he told her no, they're just engaged and comitted to each other....he also told the Officer that he keeps it on to remind him of what he has to look forward to and to remind himself that he has 90 days to get married once he's in the state. The lady smiled and said, well, that's honest, I guess. She asked him twice how his WIFE was doing in New York and he told answered, my fiancee is doing okay (the first time), but she will be better once I'm with her (the second time).
I told my man NOT to wear his band...I don't want them asking him any more QUESTIONS than he needs to answer. He better hope he can take it off when it comes time or he'll have to cut of his damn finger.
GIRLLLLLLLL I'm sorry, I thought you was doing K-1...my BAD.
Some people have mix feelings about this (if he wears the ring to the interview). We did the same thing (exchanged rings) he has a band and I have an engagment ring. We had an engagement party, which I knew nothing about. He told me I was going to meet his mom, dad and brothers and when I got to their house he had the whole FAMILY--- they came from all of the ISLAND...some even flew in from Caymans. I was at a loss for words. I told him I wanted somthing PRIVATE and well, I couldn't even speak. Then he started to cry and that did me in. My cousins's fiance who got approved last year (wore his wedding band to his interview) and yes, they did question him about it...(DAMN EDIOT kept on playing with it while she was going through his paperwork)-- she was done with the questioning and was about to tell him he was approved. She asked him if they got married and he told her no, they're just engaged and comitted to each other....he also told the Officer that he keeps it on to remind him of what he has to look forward to and to remind himself that he has 90 days to get married once he's in the state. The lady smiled and said, well, that's honest, I guess. She asked him twice how his WIFE was doing in New York and he told answered, my fiancee is doing okay (the first time), but she will be better once I'm with her (the second time).
I told my man NOT to wear his band...I don't want them asking him any more QUESTIONS than he needs to answer. He better hope he can take it off when it comes time or he'll have to cut of his damn finger.
GIRLLLLLLLL I'm sorry, I thought you was doing K-1...my BAD.
I think for embassy purpose you should get wedding bands. We couldn't afford what i wanted either but i settled for less and i don't think i would change it now. the pastor told us that no matter how lonely we feel to look @ my wedding band and we will be right there for each other. this may will be 6 years since we've been married.
I think it probably doesn't matter at all. Lots of men don't wear wedding bands.
If USCIS is judging whether a marriage is valid based on a wedding band - well that would just be - strange.
As long as you have lots of primary evidence you should do fine.
If USCIS is judging whether a marriage is valid based on a wedding band - well that would just be - strange.
As long as you have lots of primary evidence you should do fine.
QUOTE(Meliss3108 @ Jan 17 2008, 08:29 PM) 
My finace and I are thinking about not exchanging rings at our Jamaican wedding. Our plan has always been to have a small wedding (read inexpensive) in Jamaica for his family and have a second larger wedding once he is in the states. He is concerned that when he goes for his interview they may think less of the marriage because we didn't exchange rings--- we can't afford what we really want right now and I don't see the point in spending money on rings that we don't really love. Any thoughts?
A simple silver ring isn't going to look any different than white gold or get a gold plated ring. Keep the interviewers happy and it won't cost a lot.
QUOTE(Trelawny20853 @ Jan 17 2008, 06:05 PM)
Hey girl,
Some people have mix feelings about this (if he wears the ring to the interview). We did the same thing (exchanged rings) he has a band and I have an engagment ring. We had an engagement party, which I knew nothing about. He told me I was going to meet his mom, dad and brothers and when I got to their house he had the whole FAMILY--- they came from all of the ISLAND...some even flew in from Caymans. I was at a loss for words. I told him I wanted somthing PRIVATE and well, I couldn't even speak. Then he started to cry and that did me in. My cousins's fiance who got approved last year (wore his wedding band to his interview) and yes, they did question him about it...(DAMN EDIOT kept on playing with it while she was going through his paperwork)-- she was done with the questioning and was about to tell him he was approved. She asked him if they got married and he told her no, they're just engaged and comitted to each other....he also told the Officer that he keeps it on to remind him of what he has to look forward to and to remind himself that he has 90 days to get married once he's in the state. The lady smiled and said, well, that's honest, I guess. She asked him twice how his WIFE was doing in New York and he told answered, my fiancee is doing okay (the first time), but she will be better once I'm with her (the second time).
I told my man NOT to wear his band...I don't want them asking him any more QUESTIONS than he needs to answer. He better hope he can take it off when it comes time or he'll have to cut of his damn finger.
GIRLLLLLLLL I'm sorry, I thought you was doing K-1...my BAD.
Some people have mix feelings about this (if he wears the ring to the interview). We did the same thing (exchanged rings) he has a band and I have an engagment ring. We had an engagement party, which I knew nothing about. He told me I was going to meet his mom, dad and brothers and when I got to their house he had the whole FAMILY--- they came from all of the ISLAND...some even flew in from Caymans. I was at a loss for words. I told him I wanted somthing PRIVATE and well, I couldn't even speak. Then he started to cry and that did me in. My cousins's fiance who got approved last year (wore his wedding band to his interview) and yes, they did question him about it...(DAMN EDIOT kept on playing with it while she was going through his paperwork)-- she was done with the questioning and was about to tell him he was approved. She asked him if they got married and he told her no, they're just engaged and comitted to each other....he also told the Officer that he keeps it on to remind him of what he has to look forward to and to remind himself that he has 90 days to get married once he's in the state. The lady smiled and said, well, that's honest, I guess. She asked him twice how his WIFE was doing in New York and he told answered, my fiancee is doing okay (the first time), but she will be better once I'm with her (the second time).
I told my man NOT to wear his band...I don't want them asking him any more QUESTIONS than he needs to answer. He better hope he can take it off when it comes time or he'll have to cut of his damn finger.
GIRLLLLLLLL I'm sorry, I thought you was doing K-1...my BAD.
Lawny!!! Lawd, you have me dying with the long story and then come to the end you find out the original question wasn't for a K1, ha ha. Girl you're too funny.
I say just get a cheapo ring from Ebay. Like Omoba said, you can get one for $10 bucks! I think if you are married its good to have a ring for the interview and just in life in general. You don't realize just how much people look at that finger. Women look at it when eyeing a guy, guys look at in when trying to eye you so it just "helps" in lots of ways than just being a pretty rock on your finger, the symbolism is so much more. So just get something til you can afford something better. I find my ring just nice to look at and I play with it alot and it just reminds me of the time hubby and I spent on Ebay looking for it and when we exchanged them at our wedding. We actually got the permanent ones on Ebay but there are many temps on there too.
QUOTE(Dimples876 @ Jan 17 2008, 06:19 PM)
I think for embassy purpose you should get wedding bands. We couldn't afford what i wanted either but i settled for less and i don't think i would change it now. the pastor told us that no matter how lonely we feel to look @ my wedding band and we will be right there for each other. this may will be 6 years since we've been married.
I completely agree. When I look at that ring, I am not as lonely and I just like how it looks. makes me feel married. Its wierd being married but never living with your husband, at least the ring give me some allusion to being a wife....at least til we are together.
QUOTE(Marlita @ Jan 18 2008, 01:01 AM)
QUOTE(Trelawny20853 @ Jan 17 2008, 06:05 PM)
Hey girl,
Some people have mix feelings about this (if he wears the ring to the interview). We did the same thing (exchanged rings) he has a band and I have an engagment ring. We had an engagement party, which I knew nothing about. He told me I was going to meet his mom, dad and brothers and when I got to their house he had the whole FAMILY--- they came from all of the ISLAND...some even flew in from Caymans. I was at a loss for words. I told him I wanted somthing PRIVATE and well, I couldn't even speak. Then he started to cry and that did me in. My cousins's fiance who got approved last year (wore his wedding band to his interview) and yes, they did question him about it...(DAMN EDIOT kept on playing with it while she was going through his paperwork)-- she was done with the questioning and was about to tell him he was approved. She asked him if they got married and he told her no, they're just engaged and comitted to each other....he also told the Officer that he keeps it on to remind him of what he has to look forward to and to remind himself that he has 90 days to get married once he's in the state. The lady smiled and said, well, that's honest, I guess. She asked him twice how his WIFE was doing in New York and he told answered, my fiancee is doing okay (the first time), but she will be better once I'm with her (the second time).
I told my man NOT to wear his band...I don't want them asking him any more QUESTIONS than he needs to answer. He better hope he can take it off when it comes time or he'll have to cut of his damn finger.
GIRLLLLLLLL I'm sorry, I thought you was doing K-1...my BAD.
Some people have mix feelings about this (if he wears the ring to the interview). We did the same thing (exchanged rings) he has a band and I have an engagment ring. We had an engagement party, which I knew nothing about. He told me I was going to meet his mom, dad and brothers and when I got to their house he had the whole FAMILY--- they came from all of the ISLAND...some even flew in from Caymans. I was at a loss for words. I told him I wanted somthing PRIVATE and well, I couldn't even speak. Then he started to cry and that did me in. My cousins's fiance who got approved last year (wore his wedding band to his interview) and yes, they did question him about it...(DAMN EDIOT kept on playing with it while she was going through his paperwork)-- she was done with the questioning and was about to tell him he was approved. She asked him if they got married and he told her no, they're just engaged and comitted to each other....he also told the Officer that he keeps it on to remind him of what he has to look forward to and to remind himself that he has 90 days to get married once he's in the state. The lady smiled and said, well, that's honest, I guess. She asked him twice how his WIFE was doing in New York and he told answered, my fiancee is doing okay (the first time), but she will be better once I'm with her (the second time).
I told my man NOT to wear his band...I don't want them asking him any more QUESTIONS than he needs to answer. He better hope he can take it off when it comes time or he'll have to cut of his damn finger.
GIRLLLLLLLL I'm sorry, I thought you was doing K-1...my BAD.
Lawny!!! Lawd, you have me dying with the long story and then come to the end you find out the original question wasn't for a K1, ha ha. Girl you're too funny.
I say just get a cheapo ring from Ebay. Like Omoba said, you can get one for $10 bucks! I think if you are married its good to have a ring for the interview and just in life in general. You don't realize just how much people look at that finger. Women look at it when eyeing a guy, guys look at in when trying to eye you so it just "helps" in lots of ways than just being a pretty rock on your finger, the symbolism is so much more. So just get something til you can afford something better. I find my ring just nice to look at and I play with it alot and it just reminds me of the time hubby and I spent on Ebay looking for it and when we exchanged them at our wedding. We actually got the permanent ones on Ebay but there are many temps on there too.
**********
MAWNIN My gurl,
That's what I get for drinking STONE GINGER WINE and logging on to VJ. Well, to tell to truth, we were asked the same question back in December (if he should wear the ring to the interview) and I FIRMLY said no (he's not married). Gaane to eat my BAMMI and fry fish (and I just finished exercising)....
Lawny, I am ROTFL..DWL>.. 
QUOTE(trailmix @ Jan 17 2008, 09:54 PM)
I think it probably doesn't matter at all. Lots of men don't wear wedding bands.
If USCIS is judging whether a marriage is valid based on a wedding band - well that would just be - strange.
As long as you have lots of primary evidence you should do fine.
If USCIS is judging whether a marriage is valid based on a wedding band - well that would just be - strange.
As long as you have lots of primary evidence you should do fine.
What about the USCIS isn't strange? And technically the USCIS won't be doing the interview, the DoS will be at the consulate. At least they are a bit less strange. :/
hehe ;)
QUOTE(Justin and Masako @ Jan 18 2008, 09:21 AM)
QUOTE(trailmix @ Jan 17 2008, 09:54 PM)
I think it probably doesn't matter at all. Lots of men don't wear wedding bands.
If USCIS is judging whether a marriage is valid based on a wedding band - well that would just be - strange.
As long as you have lots of primary evidence you should do fine.
If USCIS is judging whether a marriage is valid based on a wedding band - well that would just be - strange.
As long as you have lots of primary evidence you should do fine.
What about the USCIS isn't strange? And technically the USCIS won't be doing the interview, the DoS will be at the consulate. At least they are a bit less strange. :/
hehe
good point. Upon thinking about this, maybe having a ring is a good idea! There is a person in the Canada forum whose Husband had his interview today, he was sent away as he hadn't brought his work resume' with him.
Ok so reading all the post on rings. Our idea pretty much the same. Buy what we can afford right now god knows this girl here wants real nice. But hey simple gold bands is what we are doing. He wears a silver band right now and I have a engagment ring (not the ring) But to us its a awesome commitment and means to us we are married even though we have not said the proper I Do's. We exchanged rings before he left. I still don't know what to do when we get married. I will be reading here alot and finding out thats for sure.
Wishing for everyones others halfs to get here fast and safe
Wishing for everyones others halfs to get here fast and safe
QUOTE(Meliss3108 @ Jan 17 2008, 08:29 PM)
My finace and I are thinking about not exchanging rings at our Jamaican wedding. Our plan has always been to have a small wedding (read inexpensive) in Jamaica for his family and have a second larger wedding once he is in the states. He is concerned that when he goes for his interview they may think less of the marriage because we didn't exchange rings--- we can't afford what we really want right now and I don't see the point in spending money on rings that we don't really love. Any thoughts?
I'd say get rings if they are meaningful to you. There are plenty of people who, for one reason or another, do not wear jewelry. Don't let the idea of making a *right* impression during the interview dictate your life choices. A genuine relationship isn't marked by what is worn, but rather, by what is felt and expressed in daily words and deeds.
If you do choose rings, bear in mind they need not be expensive!
We got really simple and inexpensive gold bands from a store in the mall. I think they were $100 for both of them. We had intended on getting *nicer* rings when we could afford them, but now I like mine so much, because it reminds me of such a special and happy day, that I don't want to part with it.
Enjoy your wedding, it'll be the first day of many happy years.
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