I didn't think you were bragging! Just proud for Sasha. Nothing wrong with that.

I did understand about the catsup. I just didn't consider the other varieties as true catsup! As someone that likes mayonnaise, a lot, I'm always happy with it's presence in everything. I'm thinking some on pizza could be very tasty.

In Kazan', they have two pizzerias that serve American style. It still is not right but far closer and better than the Russian style that tastes like flavoured cardboard.

No worries Jeff. I knew you personally didnt think I was bragging. It just occurred to me that other readers might see it that way. Yes, I dont mind mayo. but I'm not a fan of the ketchup. Mayo must be even more popular in Korea. Because most of the mayo I've seen in Russia comes in large buckets with Korean writing all over them. I tried Russian pizza once and it was just like you say. Cardboard. And they even put pickles on the thing. Somewhere Italians were crying as I ate it.

Now that's ironic because when I was in Korea I couldn't find mayo in anything larger than a big squeeze bottle. My Russian roommate and all her friends used to have me buy bigger jars of it from the base because we couldn't buy it in the local shops. Then again, we didn't go to the big supermarkets, only to the local neighborhood markets. I used to buy a $#!tload of sour cream too!

But Koreans, being just like Americans, will produce and market anything, even if they really don't like it that much as long as someone will buy it.

True! (about the marketing) Hahaha. I'm a big sour cream fan myself. Love it on all sorts of things. I use so much of it that it makes my steaming bowls of chili cold in seconds.

Now that our engagement ring thread has morphed into food... Isn't it interesting that with all that mayonnaise, sour cream, plain old pig fat, so forth, and so on that our ladies consume, they still have some of the best forms on the planet?

hmm... but what about their moms?

It's because they walk *everywhere.* On top of that, mine actually works out at a gym and takes salsa dancing lessons. I'm pretty sure her legs could break me in half if she really wanted to. I'm...I'm actually a little scared of her...

Just wait five or ten years, especially since these women are moving to America....

Everyone says this, I'm not too worried. My Alla is not interested in McDonalds. She is a sporty girl and will continue to eat real food and exercise. I'm more worried for her teenage daughter that will! She already outweighs my fiancée because she has half the activity level and prefers the junk food.

Exactly! We just need to follow suit here.

My little 44 kg fiancée can break me in half with her competitive figure skater / dancer / trainer legs!

Yeah, I'm not too worried about mine either. She "goes in for sport" (my favorite phrase ever) even if she didn't have to walk everywhere, and has little interet in the McDonald's culture. People change of course, and I'm not saying it's impossible that her habits could get more sedentary, but I think it's unlikely.


Word. My new years resolution this year is to take off all those pounds I put on between now and my last new years resolution to take off all those pounds that I...well, you know the drill. And I've only got about 3-4 months to do it before she gets here. After that, the combination of my slow metabolism and her cooking will ensure any further weight loss to be unlikely.

Some of their phrases are great! I still like: "Maybe we can have romantic supper with candles tonight?" or when I ask where the children are and she answers, "On street'.

Yes, a whooole lot of activity is required is counteract a Russian girl's cooking. I had to add quite a few kilometers to my running to find a balance.

i lost 15-20 pounds while in russia. of course, my bf RUNS to work in the SNOW.

I lost, gained, and lost again. In perfect rythym with the winter when I lived in Kazan'. All because I could not run in their snow.

Ah yes, when Nadya says she's going out with her friends she'll say "I'm going out on street." Or if it's just too damn cold out she'll say "I am not walking street today, maybe tomorrow." Hehe.

Not that I'm going to make fun of her speech at all. My Russian is horrible enough that I'm sure most of what I say is gibberish. I was trying to tell her I was making a joke, so I said "шутка" (shootka), only I pronounced it "sheetka." It was hard for her to stop laughing long enough to correct my pronunciation.


Which reminds me, I need to start learning how to convert to km on the fly.


I was actually surprised. I ate a lot of food while I was there (at restaurants, if she didn't think what I ordered was enough, she'd order something else for me!), but we walked everywhere so in the end I didn't gain any weight. Didn't lose any either, but I'll take it as a win.

Think of it like this 100km = 62 mi, thus 10 km = 6.2mi, thus 1 km = .62 mi, etc. So when your lady says 2km you can quickly estimate that it is about 1.2 mi or 5 km is about 3.1 mi. Thinking of it like that will give you a reasonable estimation of the distance.

Ah, nice. Thanks!

Yikes! 44 kilos? Ahem....someone get Alla a cheeseburger and a baked potato! Wow, she's tiny.



I've wondered this in the past. You see so many fit young women and most have pretty .....um..."sturdy" moms.

The thing that worries me about Russian food is they don't refrigerate many food items that we Americans do. And food cooked on the stove top seems to stay there until it's consumed which might take a day or two. But, so far I've had no major stomach problems.

True! This has worried me in the past as well. But no ill affects so far. I'm a freak about sealing everything tightly in the fridge with ZipLock products. Soups on the stove dont bother me much as long as its brought back to 160+ degrees. Russian refrigerators arent as cold as mine either. But oh well..

Yes, I'm worried that all it will take is a stiff wind to catch that party hat like a sail, and off she'll go like the flying nun!

Alright you guys!

In defense of her 44 kilos. Remember she is only 152 cm. The girl is solid muscle. She was a competitive ice skater and then turned to modern dance. (If you are interested, you can view her dance clips on our Club World Relations site by clicking the images at the bottom of the "About EOS" page.) She's just in great shape!

Oh and by the way, twice in the year I lived in Kazan' she agreed to go to McDonalds for the sake of the children. She ate two Royal Cheeseburgers (think 1/4 pounder), large fries, and an ice cream sundae!

Hahahaha!!! . That's hillarious! Of course you know we were just teasin'. I figured she was probably not too tall. I'm sure her weight is just right for her frame. But you're a good sport, nonetheless! And I'm sure she could kick all our @sses! For the sake of the children! Hahahaha

Heh, it's always the petite girls that can just put it away.


I'm sure she could kick all our asses combined. I still think you need a rudder or something on that hat though so she can at least steer in that stiff wind.

Cute story, I'll share with you guys. One time we were discussing our past and reasons we became single. Alla was telling me about her former husband. I asked if he ever hit her. Her response, "On one moment he did. It was his last. You have seen my former husband, yes, you remember his size? (He is probably 120 kilos or roughly three Allas) I picked him up. His feet not touch floor. I threw threw him on wall and said, never do it again! My husband had big shock! He consider little woman not strong. He make big mistake. He forget I am sporty girl!" She then looked at me smiled, giggled, and said, "I am happy I have tender man now. I know you would never do it." We laughed together for quite a while. So never mess with my little keg of dynamite!

It's all about the activity vs. intake levels. That's why you see so many babushkas that look "tough." They still pour on the mayo and sour cream but forget to go walking because their pensions are already paid. Compare/contrast that with our little 10-year-olds here in the U.S. and they are a "tough" looking bunch as well. Actually, rolly-polly would be more accurate. "Those X-Box games sure are cool!"

There's a "game store" in the mall where the wife and I often go to the movies and one peculiarity I noticed was they sell lots of "energy drinks" in that store. I'm thinking to myself "what the hell do you need an energy drink for while you're playing video games?" I asked a guy I work with, who's heavy into the gaming world and he schooled me on the fact that it's "very important" to drink those drinks while gaming because of the increased mental clarity, hand-eye coordination and decreased reaction time. Who knew that sitting on your @$$ pushing buttons required the help of a caffeine shot, ginseng, ginko bilboa, guarine, tuarine, B-Vitamins and an extra 400 calories?

We played Atari on mere Twinkies and Kool-Aid, and that worked just fine for us. Course, we only had one button. I guess they really do need all that extra "fuel."



Not necessarily. I think I dropped about 10-lbs after my wife's arrival because of her cooking. She wasn't allowed to work and was thus forced to stay home and cook. Prior to her arrival I had a nice Whopper for breakfast, a couple Gorditas for lunch and capped the evening with something lite like a pizza or some chicken wings. This, of course, was supplemented by beer and/or plenty of Mt. Dew throughout the day.

Once she got here, I was eating "natural" foods and there was something about "portions" in there somewhere. I remember being hungry as the only actual nutritional value I was getting was from the generous scoops of mayonnaise and sour cream snuck in between the green stuff. (Whatever that was.) Since then, we've adjusted our eating habits somewhat. She eats "her food" and I help her out whenever there's meat and/or potatoes mixed in there somewhere.

That's awesome!!!

Usually when I get called anything close to "tender" she's referring to the "soft" belly I have.

omg that's hilarious. I can just here her saying "He forget I am sporty girl!" Hehe!


Yours was a nervous laugh, wasn't it?

My laugh started nervous which only made her laugh even harder! Yeah, there is something about the way Russian girls say things that melts even the toughest male. 'He forget I am sporty girl" was the best! Especially when she said it so serious in her talk.

Oh, BTW, Slim, Alla used "tender" as in "calm and sweet."

They also have a way of saying things that makes me believe they're 100% capable of doing them. I've noticed the more nervous/afraid you seem to be, the harder you will get pressed! They're like lionesses, capable of exploiting a momentary weakness and then pouncing for the kill!

I would take just about any Russian woman seriously if she ever "in her serious talk" threatened to do something to me. I wouldn't be too worried about it, as I am also "heavy guy" but I'd definitely find a safer place to sleep!



I figured such. My wife uses "soft" as "soft and big and greasy FAT! ugly nasty foooooo!"
(Yours is much nicer.)

You have uncovered a secret... Alla has called herself a lioness ever since I first found her. It is very fitting.

Alla is also of gypsy blood and let me tell you. a combination of lioness and gypsy... Well, you may not believe me, but I have seen, literally, a cupboard door fall off the hinges when she was angry once. No one touched it and it was not falling apart beforehand. We were sitting having tea and she became angry because a client had failed to pay her and now she had to cover his end. When her voice raised, boom. She told me, "Jeffery, I am sorry. It happens sometimes when I have very bad spirits." Scared the crap out of me!

Okay...now *that's* spooky.

You do realize that you can never EVER make her mad, right? We're talking the "Don't make me angry, you wouldn't like me when I'm angry" kind of don't make her mad.

Her ex is actually luck that all she did was push him up against the wall.

yea, very lucky, because if she had raised her voice at him, something might have fallen off that he might need later

Believe me, we talked about it! She replied, "As long as I love you no bad will come." It is only when I feel hate for people. Her ex never raised a finger after that incident. There divorce was swift to follow. I did meet the guy one time. I would have never guessed them to ever be a couple. He is nothing like Alla describes as a man for her. She told me she was a young foolish girl when she married him and thought he was going places.

Oh and for Bobalouie... True! We joked about that once. She replied, "Jeffery there is not enough there to make fall off. So little I can not even remember he had this thing for real."

So Nadya's ex-boyfriend had set up her email account when they were dating, and held on to the password. I know this because I started getting emails from the guy telling me to stop seeing her, that she was a gold-digger and a scammer, blah blah. He even posted our emails on the internet. He also started listing all her personal info on scammer sites, which I'm still cleaning up. Nadya was furious. She got herself a new email account, but still the damage was done. And the guy would not stop calling her and emailing me. It got to be a huge problem, because he started even calling her work number and bothering her at work.

Anyway, one day we're talking on the phone and I asked her if "Paul" had been bothering her again. She said something to the effect of "Kirk, do not worry. Paul is goodbye." That was slightly chilling, but then I stopped getting emails from the guy, and Nadya said he no longer called. After that I was like "zomg my girlfriend is Russian mafia!" Well about 2 months later the guy sent me an email saying "good luck with your scammer girlfriend I have a new girl," I got a chuckle. On the other hand I'm slightly disappointed that my SO can't make people disappear.

Sounds like the ex-boyfriend was also American or Western? A jealous Russian boyfriend would wait until you visited her and then him and his buddies would beat the crap out of you, take all your money, and you'd be lucky enough to return And if you went to the authorities, why they'd beat the crap out of you too, for instigating the whole thing and not having your visa registrated!

LOL! Yeah, Canadian.

Wow! Interesting story, Kirk! Glad that guy disappeared!

Out of all the letters Alla received in the past she really only had one other guy that seemed serious for her. He never showed up though after he said he was coming to Kazan' and she never heard from him since.

It's funny how both of you have mentioned other "men" your ladies were considering and both were long distant foreign relationships. I wouldn't worry about that, probably the biggest threat in alienating the affections of your fiancée has to be the local Russian guy! He is there now and in person. What better way to steal a woman's heart then to do it in person rather then sending an email! Then again a lot of the Russian guys are avoiding women with prior marriages, kids, and baggage of that sort, so its hard to say.

My fiancée wants nothing to do with the locals. And hasn't for a looong time. Her last local boyfriend was a year before I first came across her. More than 6 years ago. And he was not even really a boyfriend to her. More a social partner.

Oh believe me, the last thing I see "Evil Canadian dude" (as I have come to think of him) as is a rival. He's done more to disqualify himself for her affections than I could ever do. As for the locals, I don't worry about them. I trust that she'll be faithful to me just as she trusts that I'll be faithful to her. And if one were to steal her away, then better I should know that she didn't love me enough now than to find out later. Been there, done that, have the official tote bag and no desire to do it again.

Well said Kirk! My feelings exactly. If someone can woo my Alla from me, she ain't for me. Hey, I didn't get my tote bag! Ohhhh, that's right. My former wife got that too.

You didn't get the tote bag? Where on earth do you store all your emotional baggage? I mean, I just use the tote bag for my portable emotional baggage. The rest I keep in crates in a warehouse. You might have seen it at the end of the first Indiana Jones movie.

No, she would even let me keep my those! Said I took too many away from her!

There are a lot of spirits and "energy" floating around here too. Sometimes we have to do things to get rid of our "bad energy" or to get the "good energy" to come to us. Feng shui is pretty popular here as well. As for the "spirits" they usually are in sync with the energy. Good spirits come from having good energy. We even have our "daemons" (check out the Golden Compass movie) in the form of our cats. One is "mine" and one is "hers." It's pretty accurate though because one is fat and lazy, just wants to eat and sleep (and type on VJ) and the other is always darting around looking for something to do, mischieviously playing or yelling at us. None of that stuff was present before my wife arrived. There were some smells.... but no spirits or energy or anything like that.



Way back when I was "socially friendly" with this girl and one day I was asking her if she was ever scared being out late at night back home in Russia. She said it was very dangerous for girls out late at night because someone would always try to take them or kidnap them for money or whatever. I asked if she was scared and she said, "I never scared because if somebody try take me, they stop car and say 'get in now' I say 'wait one minute I go in my purse for my cigarettes... and BOOM!!! BOOM!!! BOOM!!! (*makes pistol shooting moves*) Makarov from my purse!'"

I was astonished. "How come you had a gun in your purse? How did you even get a gun anyway?" She said, "My father and my brother very big guys in mafia business." So I said, "You're in the mafia?" And she replied, "No. No. I'm not in mafia, but my father and my brother are. It's family business."

Needless to say I didn't do anything to piss her off anymore!

LOL! Although any kidnapper who lets someone dig in their purse for cigarettes is really asking for it. I don't know this for sure, but I'll bet the first thing you learn at kidnapper camp is "don't let the victim take stuff out of their purse." Well...that might be the second thing. The first thing is probably "don't take personal checks."

I was talking to a friend yesterday about this discussion. (We both agreed that K'T needs to keep Alla happy if he hopes to keep "stuff" from falling off!) We had this exchange:

Me: So I was disappointed that it turned out she couldn't really make people disappear.
Friend: He was Canadian?
Me: Yeah
Friend: In fairness, how hard would it really be to make a Canadian disappear?

I thought that was pretty funny. (no offense intended to our semi-opaque neighbors to the north. )

Man, we sure hijacked this thread, haven't we boys?

You are darn tootin' I'll keep Alla happy! Lioness, gypsy, and... for the record, Alla has two uncles, retired former KGB. I will not get into the details of one of her uncle's specific job description. I can only say, I am very happy her uncles both consider me family now and pleased to see their niece finally smiling with a man again!

They weren't the gents passing the fake Benjamins on Puitn's last visit were they?

Hahahaa!! That was ridiculous. Crooked sons of bi.tches!!