So I have a question for everyone out there who has gone through with a K1 Visa:

When the foreign fiance(e) moved to the USA, how did they manage to support themselves? Because I am basically assuming that my fiance is not going to get an EAD, and I am only a University Student with a part-time job, and cannot support him.

Basically, I'm wondering how everyone else got by not being able to work, and living in a foreign country.

Thanks in advance!

Hello MichelleMcK,

Some people have saved enough money to get by until they get their EAD. I think you mean you don't think he's going to get his EAD when he crosses the border?
You might want to check out the Canada Forum, and post this question, as I know that there are members who have gotten and EAD from a Canada/US border agent that we didn't know about!

Some people are working in Canada, even taking another job on, and save some money up, to last until they get their EAD. You can get your EAD approximately 3 months after submitting all your AOS paperwork, after marriage.

While you're a University student, and working part-time, you probably don't make 125% over the poverty line, so do you have a joint sponsor? You're going to have to show that at the interview at the Consulate. Maybe you live with your joint sponsor? Like parents?

We really don't have a lot of information about you to maybe help zero in on giving you ideas on what you might be able to do.

Like I said earlier, check out the Canadian forum here and hopefully we'll be able to help you out!

Carla

Hi Carlawarla,

Yes, I did mean that I don't think that he will get an EAD when he first crosses the border on the K1.

I am new to the forum, how do I find the Canadian forum?

Thanks for your help!

Michelle

Hey Michelle
The Canadian board is Here
From the main page it's towards the bottom under the "General Discussion" area...you will see an "off topic forum" and then regional discussion boards...we are under that.


I am working super long hours to save up as much as I possibly can. Nick has a great job but I still want to do my part. I'm hoping I can save up about 10 grand before coming down.
Best of luck to you!!!
~Laura

You get a full time job long before you ever apply for a fiance visa! Government won't consider applicants who can't show they can support their future spouse. Affidavit of Support is what you need to provide.

Good luck, buddy!

The men I've known in my life all knew how they were going to support their brides before they proposed. A few boys weren't so wise. Perhaps you're a premature petitioner.

Yes, no one should ever petition unless they can support their spouse in white picket fence style.

OP, this is your third thread with the same question, no? One's enough.

Wow, congratulations on all your friends still being alive and married over 50 years!

Hmm, Pushbrk only stated that before you propose, you should have a good idea of the practical side and how you will be able to support each other. I fail to see how that has anything to do with longevity of marriage

I'm not sure if the K1 has the same requirements as the K3 but the petitioner (and, if applicable, their joint sponsor) have to prove that they are in a position to support the spouse.

The exact wording on the I-134 is "That I am willing and able to receive, maintain and support the person named".

If you or your joint sponsor are not in this position, then you should not be filing. The affadavit you are signing is binding for 3 years.

Unless the fiance/spouse has saving that they are bringing with them, then they are your and your joint sponsors responsibility.

Exactly, but I was being a bit more general. I have two married daughters and have married three times. My sons in-law knew how the couple was going to deal with their financial needs before they married. One did so by a combination of waiting to marry until they could afford to live away from parents independantly. The other worked out that she had just graduated from Dental Hygiene school, so has been the primary bread winner while he has worked part time as he finishes college himself.

To be even more clear for the OP. You've proposed marriage, so it's time to be a man and support your wife. If this means some changes in your life, so be it. That's what men do. If she can support you for a while, fine, but ultimately this is a solution for you to find from within your own resources.

The OP is a woman.

Forgive me for asking, but why would you petition to bring a foreigner here KNOWING that the USCIS/DHS paperwork does not happen overnight-and have no plan on how you two are going to manage financially in the interim?

I was accused of being " unromantic" by someone on here about a year ago when I posted that romance/ hearts and flowers were all good, but doesn't buy the food, health insurance or pay the bills. Mark and I waited alittle longer to file while we saved ( for a house and nest egg when he got here), made sure he was covered on my health insurance and until he secured a preliminary job offer ( pending getting his EAD).
On all his visits here; he was visiting companies with a portfolio of projects he had complated in Holland with references and his resume. Emailing them from Holland and building a network. Not only did he network-he got 2 job offers-pending EAD. It meant waiting alittle longer; but I am glad we did. He had a job waiting for him, credit established and health insurance with no waiting period and we could afford to live during the time he was not working waiting for his EAD.

It's easy to understand the " rush to be together" after being apart. I KNOW what that feels like. It's romantic to dream of being together, and you want that ASAP. But nothing is more unromantic than no health insurance in an emergency, no money in the bank or no food in the cupboard.
Just my opinion.

I thought your whole "thing" was answer the questions, don't make personal judgments on others' relationships.

Now now Jenn. Don't question the wisdom of he who knows all.

Yes, because as we all know, its ALWAYS the men who have to 'support' the women...

There's a difference between rushing into something and asking for advice on how people manage the forced unemployment. The OP is asking about the latter.

OK thanks for the clarification on that

Perhaps you see it one way, but I have to agree with Shele here (as usual)....I, too was said to be 'unromantic' for worrying about things like money and security, but I believe to not have that sorted with a plan would be rushing. It's not easy or fun to recognize financial priorities before what the heart wants, but at the end of the day, taking care of the former will only benefit the latter in the long run.

PS - nothing's to say the OP can't get a full time job as well....people do that all the time. I worked full time while going to college...it wasn't easy, but it's possible.

The OP asked for advise on " how people managed". I told how we managed....and Lisa...Yep-I remember that thread well.

Now that is funny.

And I'm not advocating jumping into marriage while unemployed or without a plan, but the OP asked for advice on how to make a plan and was pretty much told 'wait until you're financially secure, like on your second or third spouse.'

Did I miss something? Where was the OP advised to "wait like on your second or third spouse...?"
Who said that?
My advise to the OP [ by telling how we did it] is to devise a financial plan. It's difficult, not romantic, MAY mean waiting a short while to save-but during the wait, have the foreign SO research their field of expertise in your area, network with their resume and save also. In the meantime the USC MAY need to get full time employment ( if only for the benefits and $$$$ to cover the I134) and lay ground work for their life together here. The wait is longer, but financial security in a new marriage, especially with someone new to the country who is unable to work immediatly- is a HUGE deal...IMO ( of course).

edit--typos, etc

Reality check.

Sponsoring someone to come to marry you requires commitment. Immigration is not a easy process and is a test of endurance and patience. The government requires you show that you can financially support your intended partner so that they DO NOT BECOME A WARD OF THE STATE (meaning they don't fall back on public assistance). You sign an Affidavit of Support, which demonstrates your financial status and stability and guarentees that you will be held responsible for your spouse.

At the Consulate level, the officer will interview your fiance to see if both of you are honest and committed to marrying. There are many issues of marriage fraud and people who abuse the system. It is not an easy interview.

What will you do to help your fiance adjust to living in USA?

As for you question of "how to get by, without working, living in a foreign country.." It seems pretty naive.

Most people work damn hard to save money over years to go on trips. Have you ever considered doing the same?

No one said anything about a 2nd or 3rd spouse. If you cut that out of what you said, the rest is very sage advice. Get a full time job, save your money...possibly wait til you're done with uni......WHY are these considered bad things? No, it's not pleasant, and instant gratification is oh so much better...but at the end of the day, if the OP can't afford to support her fiance, and the fiance isn't 'tons o bucks' where it's not an issue...I can't see any happy happy way around this...short of living off others.

You're putting words in ppl's mouths, Caladan....and when did advocating saving, getting a higher paying job, waiting, and planning become bad things?

PS - the way I read the op was 'how did the foreign fiance support him/herself?' Because the OP said she couldn't support him. That's a roadblock, for sure...and sadly not one that 'love' can fix. Cos if you have the easy answer to 'how do you live in another country with no money, no job, and no one to support you?'....you need to write a book and sell it! It'll be a bestseller, for sure

All right, here is a freeloader's advise
Usually housing is the major cost.
If you are religious, you may ask your church for help with housing. Sometimes they have dormitory style living quarters for those in need. In exchange you will have to go to masses and may be help around a little... but if you are religious anyway, that should not be a problem
Ask around, may be someone needs a house sitter for several months, close to the date of your fiance's arrival. That's a nice free housing for you
Otherwise - move in with your parents/siblings temporarily.
You could ask for a room in exchange for work. Often times you can get it at horse stables. Your fiance could babysit in exchange for a room for two of you. Excellent experience for handling your future children, LOL.
For immediate expenses:
Sell your no longer used stuff on Ebay or through Craig's list. That can be done by your fiance once he's here...
See how you can cut your current bills in preparation for future tough times. You do not need the following: cell phone, cable TV and I-net. Yes, I mean it You surely LIKE them, but you can use free I-net at your school and watch only the free off air channels. Surely you have friends who will invite you over if there is something you *must* see on the cable!
You can take a student loan, invest it for now into a CD account and use it when your fiance arrives.
Find out if you can add your SO to your student health insurance plan and how much that will be. If not possible, find out if there is free stuff offered by your university. If you have a Medical Department, there are likely times/places where one can get medical help for very cheap, because there will be medical students learning how to work with patients.
Don't eat out, instead learn to cook and learn where to buy food cheaply. Your fiance can take tips from you and do the actual shopping to help you. He can cook himself too, right?
Most of all, don't quit school for a low paying job. In the end - it is not worth it. Your student status gives you a lot of perks - cheap health insurance, discount public transportation etc. Learn how to live frugally instead. You can do it!

Aaahmmm...
On a second thought, I should write a book and sell it!

Very nice - I liked it. Real problem solving instead of preaching. Excellent.

No need for pissy responses and personal attacks. It doesn't matter whether the OP is a woman. I'm writing about men and brides. Doesn't matter which one is which. If it isn't clear to them that I'm saying the couple needs to work together to have a plan before deciding to marry, then we're dealing with morons. Since I doubt that's the case, I'm thinking they can figure out I'm talking to both of them. I already posted that one of my daughters is the primary earner in her family, (even while pregnant) so you can put the women's lib gun back in your holster.

If the couple doesn't know how they are going to manage their living expenses, perhaps there's been a premature petitioning. It's not a value judgement. It's purely practical. If it's the woman who proposed marriage, my comment still stands. It matters not who instigated. Both the male and female agreed to marry. If the man's plan is for the wife to support him for a while that's a plan but it doesn't appear to be this couple's plan.

That's the biggest load of shite and you know it, Mike. Your first post to the OP referred to a MALE writer and so did the post Tracy quotes.

You're all about coming back to threads you've posted in if you are 'right' and hammering it into people that you are right? How about admitting when you are WRONG?

Or is this post more about your freaking value judgment instead of STRAIGHT TALK.......

Not sure what's going on here ^^^^

...but I was wondering, RJ, is there something wrong with stating that a financial plan ( or at least having an idea) BEFORE the SO immigrates is a good idea for all concerned? Really that's my advise to the OP( and not preaching at all...).

I spoke of men in my post. I meant it. I did not refer to the OP except as "petitioner".

Please stop the personal attacks.

The OP pretty much stated she doesn't have a plan at the moment. Pretty typical really for a college student used to just figuring out how to buy books next semester and pay the rent next month (and I can say that because I've got one home from school right at the moment).

I took the OP's question as looking for practical tips on what the SO could do to help support himself and ultimately the couple. Maybe that's not the way the government WANTS it to be when they ask USC's to complete the I864, but it's reality. For you, that included having Mark seek work before he got here.

It's not a personal attack. I can read. A B C. Learned it in grade school.

Get over yourself.

You are using convenient interpretation based on your agenda to bash me. "You" refers to the petitioner. "Men" refers to "men".

Your post was a personal attack that called me a liar. Knock it off.

I was being a bit hyperbolic (as I figured was obvious from context), but seriously, people here are acting like the OP is horribly irresponsible for asking how to plan. Or for getting engaged without being upper middle class first. Lots of people manage being right at poverty level, by taking a second job, or by saving like crazy people to tide them through a few months. Some people, like me, did it while in school. Would we be more financially secure if we waited the seven years or so it will likely take me to get tenure? Sure. Did we make it just fine now? Yup, and I don't think I was irresponsible because we don't own our home first. Some people move in with family. Not ideal, and not what I'd want but there are plenty of relationships that I don't think are ideal that other people manage to make work.

I'm not saying 'oh love will feed you' but you know, she actually got helpful answers on her other thread. Like considering a CR-1, which takes longer, but can allow him to find a job here right away. And rough estimates of what she should budget.

Nobody mentioned middle class. You're exagerrating. If you married while in the University and managed financially, then you did so with a plan.

One does not "support themselves" without "working", "stealing" or using savings. Other options are "being supported" by others. The plan needs to utilize resources available to the couple, whatever those might be, including "work" or "parental assistance" or "student loans" etc. It's simply the practical side of "marriage".

All I'm saying is that the men I know had a plan for the practical side before they arranged to "marry". No need to read anything more into that. Straight talk is best understood by avoiding added interpretation. Literal will suffice quite nicely.

The remark that got my attention is

"To be even more clear for the OP. You've proposed marriage, so it's time to be a man and support your wife. If this means some changes in your life, so be it. That's what men do. If she can support you for a while, fine, but ultimately this is a solution for you to find from within your own resources"


Reading this as and when it was written it seems certain poster(s) possibly assumed the OP was male - however having looked at the timeline of the OP it seems she is indeed thinking ahead - and is a simple request for suggestions/advice,

If what you want to say is ...you may need to consider the option of suspending your education and work a full time job until your then husband can gain employment or possibly use the what time is available for the fiance to build some kind of fund to use whilst awaiting permission to work ...then that i would consider helpful. Wrapping your remarks in judgements is of no help at all...i think the OP was simply asking how did everyone else get by...personally i had some funds saved which i have know i can call upon if needed - however i appreciate other people may have some suggestions that are more appropriate - i do wish the OP lots of luck

Yes, the clarifying post does assume the OP is the man. Nevertheless, my advice is to the man. It works equally well for a woman but it is not judgmental. It reflects the practicalities of the situation, however unpleasant the reminder might be.

Yes, the OP was thinking ahead but the question was, "How do you "support yourself w/o working"? The answers is "borrowing" or "stealing". Perhaps you think it judgmental to reccomend adjusting the options to include working. It's not rocket science. Both my daughters married young 13 days apart 2 1/2 years ago. Somehow the couples have managed to "support themselves" but "work" was involved.

right....taking another job and saving like crazy....I think I said something similar.

It's great to be young and in love, and it's great to do it all whilst in college....hell, I did that before too so I know how it feels. But couple that with all the stress of a marriage while in college, and then add the gov't crap with AOS, and it's obviously something not to be ignored or answered with 'sell stuff on ebay' and 'disconnect your internet'. I'm sorry if you don't like that....that's the way I feel. I've expressed it in a respectful manner, as have others here....yet it's being mocked as 'preachy' and whatnot all because others disagree. The absolute snarkiness that some are dishing out here is beyond the pale, imo, and quite unnecessary.

To clarify: OP NEVER asked for help with a 'plan'. OP asked how others dealt with the issue. She hasn't filed yet, and imo, everyone's opinion here is one that should be given attention. That's why there's more than one flavor ice cream....we all have different tastes. It's not preachy to say 'hey, put a plan in place because this is going to be hard'. I personally wouldn't have peace of mind if D came over and we had no money, he didn't work, I had a v limited income that couldn't support us both, etc. Many non-USCs come over and have hard adjustment periods. How much harder is an adjustment when you add severe money issues ontop of that?

It's all well and good to be 'yay for love!' but take love to the store and try to buy food with it. That's not being snobbish, or money hungry...that's being realistic. People can ignore that and do whatever they want, but that doesn't make what I say any less true.

It might be good to keep this in mind the next time you accuse someone of being judgmental when stating the practicalities of other situations, such as dealing with age differences, knowing the beneficiary for only a brief amount of time among other red flags in the petition process.

It's NOT a convenient interpretation!! YOU wrote it!

Are you annoyed that I have your attention? I mean, isn't that the excuse you gave to me for whenever you are rude, insulting, degrading, crass or otherwise just plain pompous? That you are trying to get someone's attention?

Do I have your attention now? It shouldn't be hard. They are your words, after all.

Stop trying to wiggle your way out of the fact that you friggin' speed read your way around this community (to the point that you missed this one) in order to promote your particular brand of 'knowledge', which mostly consists of making yourself feel superior and making other people feel small.

You are the one that needs to knock it off.

Brothers and sisters of the Congregation of Self Importance, let's have an amen!

double post...ooops

.n/m messed the post up.

Was that really necessary?

OK- I messed up the last 2 posts trying to get the quotes lined up---I am not such an internet expert....sorry



I interpreted the OP's post slightly differently. The OP asked " How did YOU manage?"

...When someone asks me " How did you and Mark manage?", I tell them exactly what I told the OP.

I agree with you in that it is no suprise, that as a college student, the OP's financial situation is typical. Therefore, IMO, it's also not suprising that there are some people ( myself included) that have said that it may be pertinent to wait and save. ...But at the end of the day, it's just advise. And the OP is free to take it or leave it....Everyone has their own story and what worked for them....Does not make anyone any better than anyone else. Nor does it make it a bad thing to state that for some individuals ( myself included)...the practicalities of bringing a foreigner here- and being able to manage financially to live ranked very high on our lists....It was a personal fear of mine to not have health insurance for Mark...But that was MY fear...Others may not be so concerned about that--and that's really up to them...No judgements..... There is no air of self importance-the OP asked OUR OWN way of dealing with it, and it was told......... After all OUR OWN story and circumstances ( no one else's) is all we are experts on..no?

gosh people, please stop the bickering.

People who are in college get married everyday and somehow manage. It may not be ideal but they do it.

I'd say that for most people, there's a middle ground somewhere between NOT WORKING and waiting until they saved up a nestegg, found jobs, and had health insurance.

I just get tickled whenever people talk about excessively planning out any big thing in their lives. I mean, sure you need to look ahead and not wear blinders. But life is just so unpredictable and the best laid plans have a way of falling apart.

I'm all about doing whatever it takes to make me happy - not just secure. If that means taking a calculated risk, I usually do it.

I agree with you previously that the rigours of college and the subsequent financial concerns of that are huge. Yes, some people manage through it and manage to petition, but if it were my son in college wanting to petition...I would give the same advise I gave the OP.
Calculated risks are OK-but what are you calculating a risk against...? My finace's health is not something I wanted leaving to chance....Therefore insurance was important to us.
Security was important to Mark and me.... I don't see anything wrong with that or planning a huge step like immigrating carefully.

I know that quite a few people here have gotten a sponsor and lived with the parents of the petitioner until they have become financially settled enough to move out on their own. This sometimes lasts a year or more. It isn't perfect, no, but it is a solution to housing and putting a roof over your heads for the interim.