Ok following on from a thread that took off and flew in Off Topic, I thought we could get some stats in on how you feel if you partner looks at or uses porn.

It seems there are some strong opinions out there on this subject.

I don't object if my husband looks at porn. I don't have an issue with porn but think it's part of everyday life, but I used to mind if my husband looked at porn. Have since discovered that it's nothing to be worried about if you can trust each other, especially since he only looks at it when I'm not around. But I think feeling ok about has a lot to do with the way you feel about yourself and your own body, and frankly I prefer the way I look to the looks of your average porn-star and so does my husband...

I'm not insecure about it. I know where I stand! besides, it's sexy! hehe

I don't object and I don't feel insecure about it at all....

I'm probably the one that looks at the most porn in our relationship .. Andy isn't really bothered about porn...





Patricia

I don't object to it in a sense. If he was going behind my back and lying about it...or if he was using to it to fill I need for him that I WASNT or COULDNT...then I object.

I'm all for using and watching together...but behind my back? no way.

I think porn is disgusting.

Porn is stupid, senseless and just plain GROSS. I've looked at a bit of it to try and see what men see in it but it just looks ugly to me. If John REALLY wanted to look at pictures of naked women I guess I wouldn't object as long as it was just looking... but he's always said that porn doesn't do anything for him either and the only naked woman he wants to look at is me

I certainly don't mind!

I picked "porn is a shared part in our relationship". My husband and I are really not into porn on a regular basis. The rare occassions that we've looked at it, we were together and it was as one of many ways to add spice to our sex life.

I have no problems with it, but think much of it is stupid -- like the huge watermelon fake tits, I will never understand what men get out of looking at something so unnatural, but I'm not a man.

I actually love all the old pinup stuff (which is obviously pretty tame now) - vargas girls, bettie page, etc.

Some porn is funny.

We usually watch together.

It doesn't make me insecure to see those perfect female bodies.

It just makes me wish I had the money for a boob job.

We both object to having it as part of our relationship, for a variety of reasons.

porn can be a good educational experience

I haven't commented yet:

I do not object to it

We haven't used it together but may in the future

It does not make me insecure

I enjoy written pornography well done

I object if the people are really unattractive


seriously-I do not mind porn at all. I wouldn't say I go out of my way to watch it but I have also never turned it off Some is actually quite amusing

therein lies the problem ... a woman will never be able to view something as a man .... impossible!

it has been proven that are brains are stimulated differently.

[font=Comic Sans Ms][size=2]
well
i did object that's because:
first my wife doesnt like that the same as me
second i cant see any bodies other than my wife's so why i would watch it

I like porn.

I could care less- I consider it a normal part of a man's life. I don't feel threatened at all. I would only mind if he'd rather look at porn than be with me! Since that isn't an issue, I have no problem with it.

i dont like it its GROSS and i wouldnt like my husband watching it and its not that i am insecure is just i would feel he's not completely satisfied with me if he has to look there .... and definetely i wouldnt see that as a turn on if dont like that stuff... yuck....

Wanting to or not wanting to look at porn seems to be one of those things that JUST ARE. Some do, some don't. If they do, they're not going to change. I came upon the originating thread late and read ALL 37 PAGES. I thought the resolution posted by the OP sounded very sweet and very naive.

My ex-husband loved porn. He never got into it online because he never figured out how to run a computer, but he had a video collection which he swapped among similar minded friends. I watched some of it with him but thought it was gross and certainly not a turn-on for me.

My husband now doesn't like porn. He checked some out in his younger years and it just didn't do much for him so he didn't continue.

I have a friend whose husband is thoroughly addicted to porn and even got fired for surfing it at work.

I could go on but my point is simply this: some do, some don't, but if they do and they do it a lot, they don't quit. If your SO is one of these, live with it or don't live with him.

I don´t mind at all or feel insecure.

I love porn, and my SO enjoys watching it too!

Well, we are about 18 hours into this poll.

75% of the respondents are female.

67% of the respondents say they either don't mind porn or that it is part of their relationship with their SO.

Interestin'.........

porn is good.. porn is your friend

is this crash or cari speaking

I dont care for Porn. I am just not interested in watching it, and neither is my husband.

We have each other, we dont need Porn.

But to each their own

I dont like porn.

crash is speaking.,.

::refusing to comment::


::giggles::

nah, we don't like it either..and it's something we AGREE on..that's the only important thing. M.

I really have to meet some of these guys that say they don't like porn!!! Is it an all out objection, a case where they just don't go out actively looking at it, or if they did see it, would they run away, or watch?

Both like it....both watch it. Smilies are not the only thing I collect

What I don't understand is why people have to pigeon-hole every man and find it strange if a man doesn't enjoy it. Why is it so bizarre? Someone else says that women will never be able to see things as a man sees it, yet many women don't object to porn....so if it's ok that women vary in what they find enjoyable....why is it so hard to believe that men might as well????

Well, for my husband it's a case where he does not look for it, and if he happened to come upon it(not really sure how that would happen unless some weird pop up was on the computer) he would choose not to watch it. That doesn't mean that some part inside of him possibly would want to watch, but it's about self control and wanting to uphold your beliefs. It's for many reasons we both object, and the most important for us is because we are both Christians and we don't feel like God wants us to have anything to do with watching strangers have sex, etc. And besides that, we feel it's degrading and worthless entertainment.

Just accept that these kind of guys exist. I didn't think self control was a bad thing.

Most men if they think they won't get caught will and do look.

and what will "most" women do?

Some do look but more men look than women.

Frances, I never said they don't exist! Sorry, I was in the Navy for 11 years, and there were pictures everywhere! If a guy said he didn't like pictures of naked, or scantly clad women, chances are he would be accused of being gay and have the sh$t beat out of him. Is it pigeon-holed? Absolutely. There are ALWAYS exceptions and people with different belief systems and moral values.

Neither of us has any problem with it, but its not something either of us seek out either.

IMO there is no right and wrong when it comes to viewing porn. What is comfortable and acceptable for one may not be for another. When it comes to relationships there is often a difference of what is acceptable and right.....that is when one that does like to view porn will go underground so as not to rock the boat. It is one area that is often overlooked in the getting to know you stage. Porn can be a healthy part of a relationship....it can also be the downfall when views differ. Take the men that visit ladies of the night.....do you think that their partners are aware of it.....nope. Its the same with porn. Just because you think your partner does not view it.....doesn't mean they don't. Not saying that this is the fact in all cases...just that it happens....a lot.

Yes, Aussie the women are naive cuz men do look when nobody is watching.

100% with you!!


I agree with you that lying is bad too..... but when you're lied to, there's a need to look closely and see if you're doing something to cause it. I'm open to anything Dave wants to say to talk about...... maybe I don't agree with him every time but he knows he doesn't have to be afraid of me and hide stuff from me.
A lot of the times, the way people treat you is a reflex of your own actions towards them.

I don't object to porn, I am secure enough with myself to handle my fiance looking at other female bodies, as long as he is only looking and not touching, which I know he would never want to do anyway. Men are very visual in nature, it is just part of their human nature to want to look. So what if he looks, when I know I am the only one he would ever want to truly be with anyway.

Lorelle, it is sooooo good to have you back and read your posts again! I also died laughing watching your smilely!!!! In my relationship, I made sure that no stones were left unturned, and the issue of porn was one of them. In this case, my SO and I are in agreement, which to me, is important. Often times, too many issues and topics go without the necessary discussion prior to a serious relationship, let alone marriage! No one wants to think their SO is doing anything they would consider immoral or objectionable, and if all the preliminary discussions were not held, and complete honesty adhered too, then there are going to be some rude awakenings later on. I have learned through experience, and also the hard way, that full disclosure applies to more then sellling homes!

Welcome back!

My first reaction is: meh, it's just porn.
I mean, I've watched it. It can be mildly titilating, but its not something I actively seek out. My SO has most definitely watched it, and his opinions on the matter are very similar to my own. He's sent me "bloopers" and I've laughed with him over them, and we've also spent a bored night in a hotel room watching the only thing that was on the TV at the time: porn. But... it's not a need or addiction for either of us, and I think that's a very healthy attitude to have toward it.

My ex husband, however, was addicted to porn. He would go out of his way to hide it: he didn't want me to know he watched it. It wasn't just normal porn though; he had a voyeur fetish. It wasn't even until the end of the relationship when he admitted to me that he'd not only looked at voyeur websites, but that he'd also watch me when I was in the bathroom or shower by using a mirror under the bathroom door. I didn't understand that: I was his wife. He could have watched me shower anytime he wanted. He didn't need to sneak around and do that. It just creeped me out a bit too much.

People are different, and each relationship is different. What is important in each relationship is having an open and honest dialogue about it. If a couple decides together that they don't want to have anything to do with it, that is their decision and can be respected as such. If a couple decides that it can be fun to do together, that's their decision as well.

Just don't be creepy about it.

In my opinion anything thats too much is not good. I think both Charles and I appreciate some porn, but we don't need to look at it, watch it etc. We enjoy once in a while. We're yet to watch porn together. So far it has been only online porn

bump

oh and btw, porn helped our Long distance relationship strong.. we've been apart for a year and 2 months now and he had always been faithful emotionally, sexually and in other aspects. thank god for porn hihi