Moving to Spouse Country

[KaouNee 10]

My husband and I have now been married for 1 year, He is Malian and I am American and acourse he is in Africa Im in the USA. I have a question, have anyone moved out the country to be with their spouse while waiting for the spouse visa to be approved? I feel that I have easier access to everything once NVC start asking for forms and fees I can be prepared here in the USA. Also if I move now to Africa it means income will be put on hold because I am the one who work fulltime now. I have savings but moving with 2 kids will take much of it, I just need some advice I miss my husband very much and he misses me, but im pulling in both directions.

[EandH0904 1,184]

I know others who have moved to their spouse country during the process, but Mali is very different from Canada or UK. How would your children feel about It? Would their father give you permission? 

 

Of course you have to maintain US domicile and proof of being able to financially support your husband, or have a co-sponsor. 

 

Only you know if it would be a good fit for you and the kids. I'd strongly suggest a shorter visit, 2-3 weeks with them. They may not adjust as well to the language, food, culture as you will. What about their education? Will you home school? There are a lot of factors to consider.

 

I miss my husband horribly. This wait is awful, by the time I see him again it will be 7 months from my last visit, and only an 8 day stay! But no one ever died from this process. It's only a year or so (hopefully) I'm trying to keep busy, save money, work on my home and get things done I've wanted to do before he's here. 

[KaouNee 10]

Thank you for responding EandH0904.

I have considered everything and its just not a good answer for this. I think Im stronger than him because I stay busy with work and my kids but when I have those lonely days its hard to shake. My job only allow me 2 weeks at time and it could take a good 24 to 48hrs to get there depending on the flight. It just sucks because the goodbyes never get easier and I know its a big change for my kids. I spent New Years there and it seem each month there is something that we should be celebrating together Anniversary, Birthdays, but thank you I needed to read that from you I know Im not alone

[EandH0904 1,184]

38 minutes ago, KaouNee said:

 I needed to read that from you I know Im not alone

You definitely arent. You can send me a private message anytime. I communicate with a bunch of women who have Moroccan spouses on Facebook. It helps to hear their stories too, where they are in the process, what the transition was like after some husbands got here. Maybe look for a group for Mali like that too, or just a general group of women going through this. Friends/family typically don't understand but we do! Msg me anytime girl!

[KaouNee 10]

Yes, I most definitely will I need all the support I can get! And will love to read or speak with anyone who is going through what we are and their journey.

[JFH 12,189]

The separation is awful. It's the worst thing I've ever been through. But once we got to the NVC it started to go so fast and it was actually very exciting. The end is in sight at this stage. I was in the NVC filers group for September and October 2016 and we had a really good group with a great atmosphere. We were all excited that the end was near but stressed because of the separation and we helped each other through it. This site kept me sane during those months. I even kind of miss that buzz we had when someone hit case complete. 

 

Moving to Mali would be a huge step. I'd stay home if I were you and save the money to be able to do things together when your husband gets here. It's going to be a big change for your children when he arrives. Don't add further changes to their lives. 

 

Good luck. This process can be awful. It's frustrating. It's slow. But I promise you it's all worth it. That moment when the ticket was one-way, that moment when I came through immigration with my visa knowing I never had to go back, that moment when we were together forever....it was worth every minute of the wait. I can't even describe it. 

[KaouNee 10]

Omg JFH you have given me so much hope!!! Thank you! Your right it is best if i stay here and be ready for him to come. We have spoken so much about the day he will come and how I will react that day I cant wait to hug him and see his face. I visualized when you purchased that one way ticket, but that feeling you had was probably unforgettable I cant wait for that day. Thank again for your positive words.