Haven't told our parents about marriage. Will we get denied?

[venom123 32]

Me and my wife got married and didn't tell either of our families. I'm 24 and she just turned 21. We didn't want to tell our families because we've known each other for 11 months, we're a bit young to get married and didn't think our families would approve so early. Also, we live with her father/mother (they're divorced so we rotate between houses) and don't want to jeopardise our living situation if they don't approve! We told a couple friends about it and that's it.

 

Do you think immigration will see this as a major red flag and deny me?

 

Thank you

[KULtoATL 1,551]

Well, the CO might wonder but probably won't outright deny you. Just make sure at least some close friends and colleagues know about the marriage. If no one knows about it at all, it would be a huge red flag. This whole issue might also depend on which country you're from.

[EandH0904 1,184]

I don't know enough about immigration to k ow if it's a cause for that - I'll let others answer that question,  but come on. If you're old enough to get married act like an adult and own up to your life with your parents. If you're grown up enough to make adult decisions I feel you should be adult enough to deal with their consequences. 

[Georgia16 2,858]

Well it's your business but I have some questions.

 

You came on tourist visa and are adjusting your status in the US?

 

She is 21 and you guys are living with her parents. So does she make enough money to cover you for the I-864?

Otherwise she'll have to get a co-sponsor and guess that can't be mommy or Daddy.

 

My personal opinion. You guys are adults I mean 21 and 24 many have kids and everything it that age you want to be adults but you seek around because you are scared of what the family might say. Well I can tell you this keeping it hidden is even worse then longer it goes before you guys is just honest the worse it'll be. You are married now so what if the get mad for awhile it won't undo the marriage there is nothing they can do now. I mean man up and tell them! 

[Ebunoluwa 6,136]

I think your parents will find it much more hurtful to not have been included in your celebration of marriage.
As to AOS, if they make a home visit then you would be screwed. Double screwed, once by the investigators and once by your
parents finding out from total strangers you are married.
You guys are too old for this sneaking around.
Time to grow up.
 

[Lemonslice 4,553]

Not telling parents when you live far away or have little contact is one thing... not telling them while living with them is another. Makes it look like the marriage is for immigration only (arrangement between friends so that one can immigrate easily). 

The cutest part though is her parents having shared custody of a married couple.

[venom123 32]

5 hours ago, Lemonslice said:

Not telling parents when you live far away or have little contact is one thing... not telling them while living with them is another. Makes it look like the marriage is for immigration only (arrangement between friends so that one can immigrate easily). 

The cutest part though is her parents having shared custody of a married couple.

Well obviously a reason why we got married marriage is for immigration, but we also love each other a great deal and want to be together forever. We didn't want to get married for a few years as we weren't ready, but we knew we would get married one day. I would have to leave the country if we didn't do AOS and we can't stand being away from each other. We love each other too much.

 

We weren't ready for marriage yet, we wanted to do it later, but we did it early so that we can live together forever. If we weren't ready for marriage, how can we tell our parents we're ready?

 

EDITED - "reason"

Edited July 8, 2017 by venom123

[venom123 32]

6 hours ago, Ebunoluwa said:

I think your parents will find it much more hurtful to not have been included in your celebration of marriage.
As to AOS, if they make a home visit then you would be screwed. Double screwed, once by the investigators and once by your
parents finding out from total strangers you are married.
You guys are too old for this sneaking around.
Time to grow up.
 

We are not "sneaking around", I just finished my 2nd year of medical school. I am taking a year off in order to sort out this immigration situation so we can live together forever. We just don't want to tell our parents, its a personal choice. It has nothing to do with being "irresponsible" - we're very responsible people but marriage is a personal thing and everyone does it differently. We just don't want to share it quite yet because in the future we want a huge wedding - once we have the money. We didn't want to get married until we had the money for a huge wedding, but obviously we have to because we love each other and want to live together.

Edited July 8, 2017 by venom123

[Georgia16 2,858]

6 minutes ago, venom123 said:

Well obviously the marriage is for immigration, but we also love each other a great deal and want to be together forever. We didn't want to get married for a few years as we weren't ready, but we knew we would get married one day. I would have to leave the country if we didn't do AOS and we can't stand being away from each other. We love each other too much.

 

We weren't ready for marriage yet, we wanted to do it later, but we did it early so that we can live together forever. If we weren't ready for marriage, how can we tell our parents we're ready?

The highlighted you might want to keep for yourself. 

 

You have to tell them because you indeed did get married no matter if you guys felt ready or not.

 

Also you as her now husband and living with her parents should respect them enough to tell them the truth.

Edited July 8, 2017 by Georgia16

[venom123 32]

1 minute ago, Georgia16 said:

The highlighted you might want to keep for yourself. 

 

You have to tell them because you indeed did get married no matter if you guys felt ready or not.

We are not violating any rules though? We are not getting married for the sole reason of obtaining immigration. We still love each other and want to be together forever, immigration is a reason - just not the sole reason. Surely this is acceptable?

 

This is just a really stressful period for me, I'm trying to complete my studies but I also need to be able to live with my wife in the US.

Edited July 8, 2017 by venom123

[Georgia16 2,858]

2 minutes ago, venom123 said:

We are not violating any rules though?

 

We are not getting married for the sole reason of obtaining immigration. We still love each other and want to be together forever so surely this is acceptable?

 

This is just a really stressful period for me, I'm trying to complete my studies but I also need to be able to live with my wife in the US.

You just don't want to say it like that to immigration. 

 

It might be less stressful if you just came forward with everything instead of having to lie. 

 

What do you guys tell the parents on the letters you guys receive from USCIS?

[Lemonslice 4,553]

5 minutes ago, venom123 said:

We weren't ready for marriage yet, we wanted to do it later, but we did it early so that we can live together forever. If we weren't ready for marriage, how can we tell our parents we're ready?

That is a personal matter and up to you to see how you can answer/disclose the truth.

 

You do not need to convince anyone here on Visajourney, however your marriage will need to seem bonafide to the immigration officer, and not "for immigration only".  

[venom123 32]

6 minutes ago, Georgia16 said:

You just don't want to say it like that to immigration. 

 

It might be less stressful if you just came forward with everything instead of having to lie. 

 

What do you guys tell the parents on the letters you guys receive from USCIS?

Well we just tell them they're immigration letters, they don't ask questions and we're not a lying.

 

Having our parents find out about our marriage is much more stressful than having them not find out. I'm trying to concentrate on my studies at the same time and having to explain this whole situation to both of our parents makes our lives a lot more difficult and less simple. They will be unreasonable, telling us we're not ready for marriage, etc, etc. They may even ask as to move out since we're now married.

Edited July 8, 2017 by venom123

[venom123 32]

3 minutes ago, Lemonslice said:

That is a personal matter and up to you to see how you can answer/disclose the truth.

 

You do not need to convince anyone here on Visajourney, however your marriage will need to seem bonafide to the immigration officer, and not "for immigration only".  

Well what would you advise we do?

 

We really don't want to tell our parents, but will we be able to convince the imigration officer if we don't tell them?

[Georgia16 2,858]

5 minutes ago, venom123 said:

Well we just tell them they're just immigration letters, they don't ask questions and we're not a lying.

 

Having our parents find out about our marriage is much more stressful than having them not find out. I'm trying to concentrate on my studies at the same time and having to explain this whole situation to both of our parents makes our lives a lot more difficult and less simple. They will be unreasonable, telling us we're not ready for marriage, etc, etc.

What will you do about Tax time? I mean you have to file as married.

 

What other evidence have you gathered for your interview? Since you are AOS from inside US you will have an interview.

 

Your problem is not the parents not know about immigration (unless home visit of course) but otherwise that won't effect you.

But you have to do study as married people like taxes as married, finances, insurance and so on... (It's needed for immigration proposes also to show it's a real marriage)