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Green card and relationship (merged)

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Filed: K-1 Visa Country: Vietnam
Timeline

Thank you for reading my situation.

I didnt come to the US for green card. I was in love with my fiance. We opened K1 visa and I have 2 years green card now. I didnt expect it 's easy to find jobs, friends but I wouldnt expect our relationship to be that bad. He was different from the person he used to be. Besides the cultural, personal differences, the things that break my heart is he told me he is not sure if he wants to live with me or anyone else even his best friend in long-term and he might not want children. He always delays in getting my paperwork or anything which can help me independent here. He blames it on he is very busy with his own business. But when he has free time, he wants to travel alone 2-4 months without me. Somehow I feel like he is very selfish, he wants to keep me here so that he doesnt feel alone in the house but he doesnt want to invest his time in me and work on our relationship together.

What should I do? If I have to start my new life again, US would be a better choice. Is there any way I can stay here with my 2 years green card ? Or only way is trying to work on our relationship until after I have 10 years green card. Then I will ask him again and if he is still not sure about his decision, I should divorce him ? Will they suspect if I divorce right after getting 10 years green card. What if I meet a guy who treats me better than him and I want to stay with this new person?

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My heart goes out to you! He is treating you very poorly, I am so sorry. My advice would be to try to make friends with local people who could hopefully help you with obtaining some of the things you might need in order to become more independent. There are people who do manage to keep their green card even after divorce--however, have you tried asking him to go see a marriage counselor with you?

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Filed: Country: Vietnam (no flag)
Timeline

You can divorce.

Once divorced, you can file for ROC on your own with a divorce waiver. You will get a 10 years green card.

If you meet a new guy, you better be divorced if you want to marry him.

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Filed: Citizen (apr) Country: Ecuador
Timeline

Thread is moved from the Moving to the US forum to the Effects of Major Changes forum, to be among similar threads.

06-04-2007 = TSC stamps postal return-receipt for I-129f.

06-11-2007 = NOA1 date (unknown to me).

07-20-2007 = Phoned Immigration Officer; got WAC#; where's NOA1?

09-25-2007 = Touch (first-ever).

09-28-2007 = NOA1, 23 days after their 45-day promise to send it (grrrr).

10-20 & 11-14-2007 = Phoned ImmOffs; "still pending."

12-11-2007 = 180 days; file is "between workstations, may be early Jan."; touches 12/11 & 12/12.

12-18-2007 = Call; file is with Division 9 ofcr. (bckgrnd check); e-prompt to shake it; touch.

12-19-2007 = NOA2 by e-mail & web, dated 12-18-07 (187 days; 201 per VJ); in mail 12/24/07.

01-09-2008 = File from USCIS to NVC, 1-4-08; NVC creates file, 1/15/08; to consulate 1/16/08.

01-23-2008 = Consulate gets file; outdated Packet 4 mailed to fiancee 1/27/08; rec'd 3/3/08.

04-29-2008 = Fiancee's 4-min. consular interview, 8:30 a.m.; much evidence brought but not allowed to be presented (consul: "More proof! Second interview! Bring your fiance!").

05-05-2008 = Infuriating $12 call to non-English-speaking consulate appointment-setter.

05-06-2008 = Better $12 call to English-speaker; "joint" interview date 6/30/08 (my selection).

06-30-2008 = Stokes Interrogations w/Ecuadorian (not USC); "wait 2 weeks; we'll mail her."

07-2008 = Daily calls to DOS: "currently processing"; 8/05 = Phoned consulate, got Section Chief; wrote him.

08-07-08 = E-mail from consulate, promising to issue visa "as soon as we get her passport" (on 8/12, per DHL).

08-27-08 = Phoned consulate (they "couldn't find" our file); visa DHL'd 8/28; in hand 9/1; through POE on 10/9 with NO hassles(!).

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OK so you have a 2-year green card now; do you have a job? Or do you stay at home and not work? If you can have a job, you'd be in much better shape if you decide to divorce.

90 days before the 3-year anniversary of your entrance into the US, you'll have to file for Removal of Conditions (ROC). If you do divorce before then, you can still file for ROC (and get your 10-year GC) with a divorce waiver. But you'll still have to prove to USCIS that the marriage began in with all intentions of it being a permanent situation, and not just to get a green card.

So if I were you, I would prepare, just in case, and quietly collect what evidence you have that you indeed have tried to make a go of this marriage and did enter it in good faith.

Edited by Ortolan

"Wherever you go, you take yourself with you." --Neil Gaiman

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Filed: Country: Vietnam (no flag)
Timeline

OK so you have a 2-year green card now; do you have a job? Or do you stay at home and not work? If you can have a job, you'd be in much better shape if you decide to divorce.

90 days before the 3-year 2 year anniversary of your entrance into the US, you'll have to file for Removal of Conditions (ROC). If you do divorce before then, you can still file for ROC (and get your 10-year GC) with a divorce waiver. Not only can she file, she must file after the divorce even if it has not been 2 years since she got the conditional card. But you'll still have to prove to USCIS that the marriage began in with all intentions of it being a permanent situation, and not just to get a green card.

So if I were you, I would prepare, just in case, and quietly collect what evidence you have that you indeed have tried to make a go of this marriage and did enter it in good faith.

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Argh, thanks aaron2020...I was thinking of Naturalization I think. Thanks for the correction.

"Wherever you go, you take yourself with you." --Neil Gaiman

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Filed: Citizen (apr) Country: Ecuador
Timeline

A quote without a reply has been removed.

06-04-2007 = TSC stamps postal return-receipt for I-129f.

06-11-2007 = NOA1 date (unknown to me).

07-20-2007 = Phoned Immigration Officer; got WAC#; where's NOA1?

09-25-2007 = Touch (first-ever).

09-28-2007 = NOA1, 23 days after their 45-day promise to send it (grrrr).

10-20 & 11-14-2007 = Phoned ImmOffs; "still pending."

12-11-2007 = 180 days; file is "between workstations, may be early Jan."; touches 12/11 & 12/12.

12-18-2007 = Call; file is with Division 9 ofcr. (bckgrnd check); e-prompt to shake it; touch.

12-19-2007 = NOA2 by e-mail & web, dated 12-18-07 (187 days; 201 per VJ); in mail 12/24/07.

01-09-2008 = File from USCIS to NVC, 1-4-08; NVC creates file, 1/15/08; to consulate 1/16/08.

01-23-2008 = Consulate gets file; outdated Packet 4 mailed to fiancee 1/27/08; rec'd 3/3/08.

04-29-2008 = Fiancee's 4-min. consular interview, 8:30 a.m.; much evidence brought but not allowed to be presented (consul: "More proof! Second interview! Bring your fiance!").

05-05-2008 = Infuriating $12 call to non-English-speaking consulate appointment-setter.

05-06-2008 = Better $12 call to English-speaker; "joint" interview date 6/30/08 (my selection).

06-30-2008 = Stokes Interrogations w/Ecuadorian (not USC); "wait 2 weeks; we'll mail her."

07-2008 = Daily calls to DOS: "currently processing"; 8/05 = Phoned consulate, got Section Chief; wrote him.

08-07-08 = E-mail from consulate, promising to issue visa "as soon as we get her passport" (on 8/12, per DHL).

08-27-08 = Phoned consulate (they "couldn't find" our file); visa DHL'd 8/28; in hand 9/1; through POE on 10/9 with NO hassles(!).

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Filed: K-1 Visa Country: Vietnam
Timeline

Thanks everyone for taking time to feedback to me.

I need to apply before 90 days of my green card expiration date, not 90 days since I arrived US? For exmple I arrived US in August 2015 and got married in November 2015, had green card date 28 Jan 16 and expire on 28 Jan 18. So the earliest date I can apply to remove my green card is 28 Oct 2017, right? It also takes 4 months - 1 year to get 10 year green card?

I finally managed to start working for 3 months recently. He told me as a couple, we should file tax jointly because he will lose more money if we file seperately compared to money I save. So I have very low income but since I file with him, I belong to high tax bracket as well. He is a millionaire but we had pre-up and I wont get any money or alimony. I didnt come to him because of money. I just hope I can be independent and find someone who really treats me well. We are only 6 years old difference. I guess he is too young to be tight in marriage :( . Does anyone know about the exact source of filing tax based on income/marriage/single.

I am at dilemma and I feel so akward about my situation. I am under depression and cant think clearly. I dont know if I should work on this relationship until I have 10 year green card for safety, avoid all USCIS complicated questions then leave him and buliding my new life. I don't know if I should even tell a new guy about my complicated case. I feel like if I do, I am cheating but if I dont, I lose my chance to be with someone who can treat me better.

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Filed: Timeline

OK so you have a 2-year green card now; do you have a job? Or do you stay at home and not work? If you can have a job, you'd be in much better shape if you decide to divorce.

90 days before the 3-year 2 year anniversary of your entrance into the US, you'll have to file for Removal of Conditions (ROC). If you do divorce before then, you can still file for ROC (and get your 10-year GC) with a divorce waiver. Not only can she file, she must file after the divorce even if it has not been 2 years since she got the conditional card. But you'll still have to prove to USCIS that the marriage began in with all intentions of it being a permanent situation, and not just to get a green card.

So if I were you, I would prepare, just in case, and quietly collect what evidence you have that you indeed have tried to make a go of this marriage and did enter it in good faith.

Where does it say you MUST file after divorce??? You must file before the date your card expires. You are allowed to file up to 90 days in advance. IF you are divorced or battered you can submit it at any time. If you have a source that states differently please post it.

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Everything about the taxes is true. You as a couple would most likely pay more overall if you filed separately. So, if you share finances with this man (he pays for house, cars, insurance etc) it is in your own best interest to file jointly even if that means that you personally pay more than you would if you were single. Unless you're not co-mingling finances at all, this really is your best path.

Marriage/ AOS Timeline:

23 Dec 2015: Legal marriage

23 Jan 2016: Wedding!

23 Jan 2016: "Blizzard of the Century", wedding canceled/rescheduled (thank goodness we were legally married first or we'd have had a big problem!) :sleepy:

24 Jan 2016: Small "civil ceremony" with friends and family who were snowed in with us. December was a bit of a secret and people had traveled internationally and knew we *had* to get married that weekend, and our December legal marriage was nothing but signing a piece of paper at our priest's kitchen table, without any sort of vows etc so this was actually a very special (if not legally significant) day. (L)

16 Apr 2016: Filed for AOS and EAD/AP (We delayed a bit-- no big rush, enjoying the USCIS break)

23 Apr 2016: Wedding! Finally! :luv:

27 Apr 2016: Electronic NOA1 for all 3 :dancing:
29 Apr 2016: NOA1 Hardcopy for all 3
29 Jul 2016: Online service request for late EAD (Day 104)
29 Jul 2016: EAD/AP Approved ~3 hours after online service request
04 Aug 2016: RFE for Green Card (requested medicals/ vaccination record. They already have it). :ranting:
05 Aug 2016: EAD/AP Combo Card arrived! (Day 111)
08 Aug 2016: Congressional constituent request to get guidance on the RFE. Hoping they see they have the form and approve!

K-1 Visa Timeline:

PLEASE NOTE. This timeline was during the period of time when TSC was working on I-129fs and had a huge backlog. The average processing time was 210+ days. This is in no way predictive of your own timeline if you filed during or after April 2015, unless CSC develops a backlog. A backlog is anything above the 5-month goal time listed on USCIS's site

14 Feb 2015: Mailed I-129f to Dallas Lockbox. (L) (Most expensive Valentine's card I've ever sent!)

17 Feb 2015: NOA1 "Received Date"
19 Feb 2015: NOA1 Notice Date
08 Aug 2015: NOA2 email! :luv: (173 days from NOA1)

17 Aug 2015: Sent to NVC

?? Aug 2015: Arrived at NVC

25 Aug 2015: NVC Case # Assigned

31 Aug 2015: Left NVC for Consulate in San Jose

09 Sep 2015: Consulate received :dancing: (32 days from NOA2)

11 Sep 2015: Packet 3 emailed from embassy to me, the petitioner (34 days from NOA2).

18 Sep 2015: Medicals complete

21 Sep 2015: Packet 3 complete, my boss puts a temporary moratorium on all time off due to work emergency :clock:

02 Oct 2015: Work emergency clears up, interview scheduled (soonest available was 5 business days away--Columbus Day was in there)

13 Oct 2015: Interview

13 Oct 2015: VISA APPROVED :thumbs: (236 days from NOA1)

19 Oct 2015: Visa-in-hand

24 Oct 2015: POE !

15 Dec 2015: Fiance's mother's B-2 visa interview: APPROVED! So happy she will be at the wedding! :thumbs:

!

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Thanks everyone for taking time to feedback to me.

I need to apply before 90 days of my green card expiration date, not 90 days since I arrived US? For example I arrived US in August 2015 and got married in November 2015, had green card date 28 Jan 16 and expire on 28 Jan 18. So the earliest date I can apply to remove my green card is 28 Oct 2017, right? It also takes 4 months - 1 year to get 10 year green card?

I finally managed to start working for 3 months recently. He told me as a couple, we should file tax jointly because he will lose more money if we file separately compared to money I save. So I have very low income but since I file with him, I belong to high tax bracket as well. He is a millionaire but we had pre-nup and I wont get any money or alimony. I didn't come to him because of money. I just hope I can be independent and find someone who really treats me well. We are only 6 years old difference. I guess he is too young to be tight in marriage :( . Does anyone know about the exact source of filing tax based on income/marriage/single.

I am in a dilemma and I feel so awkward about my situation. I am depressed and can't think clearly. I don't know if I should work on this relationship until I have 10 year green card for safety, avoid all USCIS complicated questions then leave him and building my new life. I don't know if I should even tell a new guy about my complicated case. I feel like if I do, I am cheating but if I don't, I lose my chance to be with someone who can treat me better.

You are incorrect about your filing date.

10/30/2017, October 30th, 2017, is 90 days before the expiration date on your green card.

Also check the IRS for the exact minimum amount for filing. If you are married, you must file as married. Filing your taxes as married filing jointly will help strengthen your ROC case.

You have brains in your head. You have feet in your shoes. You can steer yourself any direction you choose.  - Dr. Seuss

 

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  • 2 weeks later...
Filed: K-1 Visa Country: Vietnam
Timeline

My 2 year green card will expire on Jan 27, 2018.

I can start filing for 10 year green card, earliest on Oct 30, 2017 right?

How long will it take to get 10 year green card?

Will it be suspicious to divorce right after getting 10 year green card?

Thank you VJ family.

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Filed: AOS (pnd) Country: Romania
Timeline

Why would you want to divorce right after you get the 10 years GC ?

Or a better question, if you want to divorce from now why would you wait 2 more years ?

Does it looks suspicious ?

AOS - PENDING

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