Gay marriage - Homophobic parents

[Benjamins187 0]

Hey, Great forum here and loads of help too.

I have a question which is giving me a hard time since I have my interview coming up soon.

I got married with my husband about a year ago, everything is going great, we spend a lot of our time between France and the US, we travel quite a lot too, did few trips to spain, italy, england and different places in the US (New York, California, Yosemite, Las Vegas, Lake Tahoe, San Francisco ...)

We are joined owner of the house in the US, bank account, tax return, utility bills, Pictures, he also got his french residency card recently. I visited the US about 6 times since we got married and the rest of time he was living in Paris with me.

My big issue and question is my Parents, they never been keen on my sexuality and I kind of broke my relationship with them over that, they never accepted it and don't want to hear about any of my life style.

Would that be a problem at the interview if I haven't got any pictures with my husband and them ?

What should I tell them ? Would it be a denial reason for my visa ?

Thank you for your help

Ben

[Harpa Timsah 13,258]

It's not a problem. Don't worry. Good luck.

[Sukie 1,439]

Hey, Great forum here and loads of help too.

I have a question which is giving me a hard time since I have my interview coming up soon.

I got married with my husband about a year ago, everything is going great, we spend a lot of our time between France and the US, we travel quite a lot too, did few trips to spain, italy, england and different places in the US (New York, California, Yosemite, Las Vegas, Lake Tahoe, San Francisco ...)

We are joined owner of the house in the US, bank account, tax return, utility bills, Pictures, he also got his french residency card recently. I visited the US about 6 times since we got married and the rest of time he was living in Paris with me.

My big issue and question is my Parents, they never been keen on my sexuality and I kind of broke my relationship with them over that, they never accepted it and don't want to hear about any of my life style.

Would that be a problem at the interview if I haven't got any pictures with my husband and them ?

What should I tell them ? Would it be a denial reason for my visa ?

Thank you for your help

Ben

No. It will not be an issue. You are one of thousands of couples whose parents are not happy with their sons' and daughters' choices. Straight OR Gay.

If asked at the interview, you can say "My parents, unfortunately, are not part of our lives."

Sukie in NY

[mallafri76 1,012]

That depends on the culture of the country in which the interview will take place. Since you're from France, it shouldn't be an issue.

[Penguin_ie 5,984]

Not a problem at all, especially in the US embassy in France.

[Benjamins187 0]

Thank you for your comments guys, I feel better knowing that this issue might not be as big as I thought it would.

My husband keep telling me that everything will be alright but I guess you can't help worrying about things sometimes !

[leeandcorinne 1]

Hi Ben,

It won't be an issue at all, even straight don't get along with their in law sometimes (well most of the time I would say! ) and don't have any pictures to show. They mostly don't even ask for pictures anyway, I went 2 times there, once for my K 1 and recently for my son IR2 and never had to show pictures.

Salut a vous 2 et bonne chance!

Corinne

[Elf 146]

Just to add one more piece of reassurance for you, I'm also the immigrant spouse in a same-sex marriage. For unrelated reasons, I have very little contact with my parents, and so my wife has not met them.

It was absolutely not an issue at our AOS interview - the IO asked my wife whether she had met my parents and when she answered that she hadn't, the IO asked why not. We explained without going into any detail that I'm not on the best terms with them, and the IO was completely understanding of that. Our interview lasted less than 15 minutes in total, and at the end she congratulated us and told us she was recommending approval. I remember feeling just as anxious as you feel now, but not having pictures with parents didn't cause any problems whatsoever for us, and I'm sure it won't cause problems for you either.

[IguanaCouple 26]

That depends on the culture of the country in which the interview will take place. Since you're from France, it shouldn't be an issue.

There are homosexual people in every culture. Rejecting someone from say Saudi Arabia simply because they married someone of the same sex when it's not acceptable in that community would be ridiculous. (Assuming they have the right evidence, of course which the OP here has well-covered, anyway ) so the culture thing you brought up shouldn't come into play.

Au contraire, a same-sex marriage case from say Saudi would in itself be the strongest evidence possible that the relationship is bona fide. You could get stoned to death for that kinda thing there.

[Tracey&Greg 33]

Hey from a neighboring state (Alabama). I know it's rough with a family like that especially when you want them to share in the joys in your life especially understand your love you have for your hubby but hang in there. You have nothing to worry about with the visa process. Warm hugs

[IcezMan_IcezLady 582]

There are homosexual people in every culture. Rejecting someone from say Saudi Arabia simply because they married someone of the same sex when it's not acceptable in that community would be ridiculous. (Assuming they have the right evidence, of course which the OP here has well-covered, anyway ) so the culture thing you brought up shouldn't come into play.

Au contraire, a same-sex marriage case from say Saudi would in itself be the strongest evidence possible that the relationship is bona fide. You could get stoned to death for that kinda thing there.

Actually, it could. But that doesn't apply to OP.

How do file I-130 for your partner the partner's country law does not recognize same-sex marriage?

It is not up to the US to define the laws for that country. Yes it is ridiculous but your sentiment is not how it works.

Most same-sex partners coming from countries that don't accept same-sex marriage typically file K-1. SO that country and culture of the place matters.

But that won't matter to OP's case.

[JohnNHenry 2]

Hey, Great forum here and loads of help too.

I have a question which is giving me a hard time since I have my interview coming up soon.

I got married with my husband about a year ago, everything is going great, we spend a lot of our time between France and the US, we travel quite a lot too, did few trips to spain, italy, england and different places in the US (New York, California, Yosemite, Las Vegas, Lake Tahoe, San Francisco ...)

We are joined owner of the house in the US, bank account, tax return, utility bills, Pictures, he also got his french residency card recently. I visited the US about 6 times since we got married and the rest of time he was living in Paris with me.

My big issue and question is my Parents, they never been keen on my sexuality and I kind of broke my relationship with them over that, they never accepted it and don't want to hear about any of my life style.

Would that be a problem at the interview if I haven't got any pictures with my husband and them ?

What should I tell them ? Would it be a denial reason for my visa ?

Thank you for your help

Ben

I think as long as they know about your sexuality and your husband, everything is gonna be okay. Good luck!.

[Ryan H 3,790]

Moved from Progress Reports to Process & Procedures.

[mallafri76 1,012]

There are homosexual people in every culture. Rejecting someone from say Saudi Arabia simply because they married someone of the same sex when it's not acceptable in that community would be ridiculous. (Assuming they have the right evidence, of course which the OP here has well-covered, anyway ) so the culture thing you brought up shouldn't come into play.

Au contraire, a same-sex marriage case from say Saudi would in itself be the strongest evidence possible that the relationship is bona fide. You could get stoned to death for that kinda thing there.

I answered OP's question whether or not his parents accepting the marriage would be a problem or not. OP's question and my answer had nothing to do with his sexual orientation.

In many countries, parents accepting the spouse before marriage, attending the ceremony etc is very important. I remember reading a couple of cases here on VJ about couples in India being refused a CR-1 visa because the CO didn't believe they were in a bona fida relationship since they didn't have the traditional Indian wedding with family and friends. So yes, the country's cultures and norms definitely affect the process at the embassy stage.

Since OP is from France, those kind of cultural norms don't exist so it's not an issue but other VJ members from countries with strong cultural norms might come along and read OP's thread and it's beneficial for them to know that cultural norms does matter.

Edited May 18, 2016 by mallafri76

[TomEn 90]

On 5/15/2016 at 0:00 PM, mallafri76 said:

That depends on the culture of the country in which the interview will take place. Since you're from France, it shouldn't be an issue.

THis is not truw. Im from a country (India) where familial ties are very important. When i went to the interview, Itold them that I am not living with my parents nor have I been in touch with them since they believe I am an abomination and that I dont need such negativity in my life.

 

OP - just be open with the CO and tell them the truth. THey really dont care much about your relationship with your parents. It is the legitamacy of your wedding that they will question.