Green Card Scam - Chinese

[ChinaPostMan 8]

She got here on December 26, 2014 on a K1 visa - I worked hard on this thing for almost two years. We married on Feb 14th 2015 - Feb 19, 2015 she shows me a airline ticket that her son was coming to live with us. Of course there was an argument, I was raised in the USA, we don't have family members just fly in to "live with us" on a whim, we discuss and try to reach an agreement...but I was unaware of the scam being played on me.

So, we argued for 2 days, mostly through e-mail. I refused to even pick him up at the airport, so Saturday morning she takes off on foot in 15 degree winter weather with her paperwork and her passport - literally walking to the airport.

5 days later I get a protective order served on me. Been kicked out of my home that I lived in alone for 13 years because of this scammer (Yujuan H.)

Hearing which is supposed to last 30 min, lasts 3 days - coz I hire the best immigration lawyer I can. The judge stands up at the end and says "Neither of you are going to like my decision, so I want you to go out in the hallway and try and make a deal." No deal can be reached. 4 days later, the judge renders his decision and I'm found to be an abuser.

She must move out of my home by Monday, March 23, 2015 and I can go back 8am the next morning.

Thank goodness I didn't file for AOS for her green card. Which I think puts me in a good position. I'm sure she'll try for VAWA (violence against women act).

I could state that I never hit, or laid a hand on her, but the thing is you, the reader was not there. My wife of only 12 days files divorce - thank goodness I filed first, and served her.

Word of advice to everyone on this forum - do not marry a foreign national - ESPECIALLY from CHINA ! The women there are nothing but scam artists and will bilk you for all your worth.

Details -

Nuclear bomb #1 - during the argument I said I was no longer interested in filing for AOS - I'm sure that set her off big time

Nuclear bomb #2 - I didn't allow her son to come live with us - he is here on F1 but is overstayed because he's been out of classes for more than 60 days - even admitted to this on the stand during the hearing.

Nuclear bomb #3 - She expected me to roll-over during the protective order hearing - I fought like there was no tomorrow and had one of the best attorney's I've ever seen in action.

My mistakes - dropping bomb #1 and #2 - I should have been way more sensitive. My bad, I wish I had known how important that green card was to her, and now I understand the Chinese mind set much better - there sense of community is much different than ours in the west. Not letting her son live with us was another big mistake.

However I do not regret fighting her tooth and nail during the hearing. I would not have gotten my home back if I had not fought hard.

I'm sure this post will generate a lot of questions but at the end of the day, I got scammed. It almost cost me everything, and if not for the sense of me hiring this attorney who kicked butt, I'd be done for.

Please let this serve as a warning to everyone - DO NOT MARRY on K1 or obtain a visa on K3 - just get a good American woman and be happy. Your life will be better.

Yours truly in Hell

ChinaPostMan

[MrsBonsu 138]

???

[kels430 31]

I'm sorry you had a bad go of things but to categorize all non-U.S. women that way is kinda extreme, don't ya think?

[SantyAndAllie 155]

I'm pretty sure this post will get reported, since you blatantly insulted not only those who are Chinese, but you also pretty much insulted anyone marrying on a K1 visa, implying that everyone will deal with the unfortunate situation that you did. Which, I'm sorry that you had to go through that, but that doesn't give you the right to tell others that they're being scammed by dating a foreigner and to "just marry American". If I wanted an American man, I'd have one. But I don't, thank ya very much.

[ChinaPostMan 8]

I would say no it is not extreme - have you been scammed like this? Have you almost lost your home that you labored over for 13 years? Did you loose thousands of dollars fighting a scammer? No you didn't - until you walk a mile in my shoes, withhold your judgement. Take my advice - run from any foreign bride as fast as you can.

[ChinaPostMan 8]

I'm pretty sure this post will get reported, since you blatantly insulted not only those who are Chinese, but you also pretty much insulted anyone marrying on a K1 visa, implying that everyone will deal with the unfortunate situation that you did. Which, I'm sorry that you had to go through that, but that doesn't give you the right to tell others that they're being scammed by dating a foreigner and to "just marry American". If I wanted an American man, I'd have one. But I don't, thank ya very much.

Pretty sure you think you are King of the forums don't you? Shame on you - have you walked a mile in my shoes? Did you go through the living hell I did? Go ahead and report - I don't care. If I save one man or woman from making this mistake then good on me - I've saved a human soul from misery - I can look my maker in the eye when I die and know I did the right thing by propagating the truth. You on the other hand stick your nose in business you think you know something about when indeed you are simply making assumptions. Again, shame on you.

[SantyAndAllie 155]

I would say no it is not extreme - have you been scammed like this? Have you almost lost your home that you labored over for 13 years? Did you loose thousands of dollars fighting a scammer? No you didn't - until you walk a mile in my shoes, withhold your judgement. Take my advice - run from any foreign bride as fast as you can.

When did I say that you dont have a right to be upset and make this a big deal? And when did I say that people don't ever get scammed? But don't sit there and basically disrespect the rest of our relationships by calling them scams just because your situation didn't work out. This isn't a judgment; this is you insulting a specific culture and essentially telling us not to get a K1 visa because your wife scammed you, and you somehow think this is what every foreign person does.

I don't think that many people want to take that advice because a good portion of us are on here for the purpose of GETTING MARRIED to a foreigner and doing the K1 process. Not every one of us is in a scam relationship. I think I'll take my chances with my man.

Pretty sure you think you are King of the forums don't you? Shame on you - have you walked a mile in my shoes? Did you go through the living hell I did? Go ahead and report - I don't care. If I save one man or woman from making this mistake then good on me - I've saved a human soul from misery - I can look my maker in the eye when I die and know I did the right thing by propagating the truth. You on the other hand stick your nose in business you think you know something about when indeed you are simply making assumptions. Again, shame on you.

Lol. You aren't saving anyone by insulting people. Who is going to take you seriously when you're sitting there and telling people not to marry foreigners because they're all scammers? Sorry, man, but that's not gonna happen. Good luck to ya.

[ChinaPostMan 8]

When did I say that you dont have a right to be upset and make this a big deal? And when did I say that people don't ever get scammed? But don't sit there and basically disrespect the rest of our relationships by calling them scams just because your situation didn't work out. This isn't a judgment; this is you insulting a specific culture and essentially telling us not to get a K1 visa because your wife scammed you, and you somehow think this is what every foreign person does.

I don't think that many people want to take that advice because a good portion of us are on here for the purpose of GETTING MARRIED to a foreigner and doing the K1 process. Not every one of us is in a scam relationship. I think I'll take my chances with my man.

Lol. You aren't saving anyone by insulting people. Who is going to take you seriously when you're sitting there and telling people not to marry foreigners because they're all scammers? Sorry, man, but that's not gonna happen. Good luck to ya.

And good luck to you also. I hope your marriage works out and your happy. I hope you never get scammed. Given what I've gone through, a bit of venting not only seems appropriate but called for. Hopefully you can see that.

Bottom line - why take this risk? Is it really worth it? My answer = no. My word of advice, beware and don't do a K visa of any kind - it's not worth the risk.

With that said - and with all my heart - I hope you are and remain happy, a marriage that is good, is the best thing a human can attain - IMHO.

I'm allowed to

[Ebunoluwa 6,136]

Your comment bashing Chinese Nationals and other foreigners is small minded and against TOS.

This is an immigration site and nobody will stop their petition because you failed to adequately understand the culture of your wife.

I have not read one thing that says she scammed you, you had a big fight about her son moving in which should have been discussed

and agreed upon but to not picking him up from the airport and her walking in the cold to pick him up is lack of responsibility on your part

and plain childish.

YOU should never again marry a foreigner, because YOU don't get it.

Was I scammed before ? Yes, by Americans ! I am also a naturalized citizen and take it as an insult for you to say don't marry a foreigner.

Be accountable for your own poor choices and stop generalizing and stereotyping.

You should make sure your communication skills match that of your spouse when you chose one or have the patience to work on it with her

and understand the culture that comes into play.

[SantyAndAllie 155]

Your comment bashing Chinese Nationals and other foreigners is small minded and against TOS.

This is an immigration site and nobody will stop their petition because you failed to adequately understand the culture of your wife.

I have not read one thing that says she scammed you, you had a big fight about her son moving in which should have been discussed

and agreed upon but to not picking him up from the airport and her walking in the cold to pick him up is lack of responsibility on your part

and plain childish.

YOU should never again marry a foreigner, because YOU don't get it.

Was I scammed before ? Yes, by Americans ! I am also a naturalized citizen and take it as an insult for you to say don't marry a foreigner.

Be accountable for your own poor choices and stop generalizing and stereotyping.

You should make sure your communication skills match that of your spouse when you chose one or have the patience to work on it with her

and understand the culture that comes into play.

Incredibly well put. Thank you.

[CowBoE 429]

LOL...you didn't just lose a wife...looks like you've lost your soul.

Take YOUR mistake like a man, and stop blaming many wonderful women in the world for you mishap.

My Chinese wife is the best decision I've made in my life.

Good luck to you in finding...uhh...American wife...

[clairegie 265]

Why didn't you want her son to come live with you or even stay a little bit until you get to a decision? You married a woman you knew had a son, so I'm a little confused why you didn't accept this about her. You married her, so your house is her house now too. Not saying the 13 years you spent working hard for it doesn't matter, but dont you also accept someone's children when you married them? You were aware that he was overstaying etc.. Let's be realistic, she is a mother. Of course she would want her kid by her. You both have good points and mistakes, but I feel the situation couldve been handled better.

At first, I was annoyed that you generalized that all foreigners are scammers. But I understand you were just hurt by the situation. I wish you the best and hope that you can still open your heart and find someone to love.

Edited March 20, 2015 by iammrsregie

[Zedayn 485]

I would say no it is not extreme - have you been scammed like this? Have you almost lost your home that you labored over for 13 years? Did you loose thousands of dollars fighting a scammer? No you didn't - until you walk a mile in my shoes, withhold your judgement. Take my advice - run from any foreign bride as fast as you can.

I would tend to say it is a little extreme to generalize all foreigners as bad.

Yes, I have been scammed before. The worst part I lost my heart to someone I loved when all she wanted was a green card. Perhaps I didn't lose thousands of dollars (I lost a few thousand), but the worst was the shame I felt when I realized the person I loved was using me.

Not all foreign women are bad. I've been happily married to a Filipina for over 6 months now, and things couldn't be better. Things will get better for you.

Edited March 20, 2015 by Zedayn

[Boiler 43,432]

Sadly I have lost count of the number of similar posts,

An expensive lesson but you acted quickly and effectively.

[TBoneTX 43,058]

Thread is moved from AOS/Family-Based main forum to the Effects of Major Changes forum and is closed to further comment, for multiple violations of the VJ Terms of Service. Do not restart this thread or refer to it elsewhere.

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