Husband fled after getting greencard

[albertarogers 0]

Hello friends,

I am in an awkward situation right now. Here is the thing.

My age is 25. I am an Indian originally. I moved to US in 2009. And got settled over here.

I went to India in 2012 and over there I was married to an Indian guy.

At first it was all good as I just thought that he is the right person for me. I was not able to stay with him much as I had to come back to USA for my job. We kept in touch over the phone and emails.

Soon thereafter I filed his application for a US visa and after successfully getting a US Visa he came to United States around April this year.

I spent quite a lot of money behind him and also financially supported him from here. When he came to USA I still kept supporting him and thought we both would be a happy couple.

We both were living at my workplace where the lodging was provided by my employer.

After supporting him for 2 or more years and applying for his visa and paying all the visa fees and plane tickets and giving his family a huge amount of money in dowry he started showing his true colors. He started harassing me mentally as soon as he got his 10 year greencard.

He then started making excuses and started having quarells with me without any proper reason. He then left me after 1 month of us being together.

I tried contacting him again and again but he never responded to my calls. Over there in India my parents and my relatives tried to contact his family but they also didn't responded very well.

I do certainly feel that I was used by him in order to get a valid US Visa and a Greencard and as soon as he got what he wanted, he left me alone.

I recently went back to India in order to convince his parents and I begged them that please do call your son and let him know that I have been expecting him.

Right now I have already spent more than 3 months awaiting for his proper reply but he doesn't wants to reply to me nor his family members want to give me a valid reason for him leaving me just days after he came to United States.

From what I have experienced based on his attitude and his family members behavior towards me, I do believe that this marriage was done just for the US Visa benefits that he would be getting after being my husband.

I am all done with him now. But I just want that guy to be back in India from where he came from.

I thought posting it over here will get me some help and some guidance on what should I do next.

Thanks.

[subz 6]

In short, as I understood, he used you for GC.. as for way forward you cannt simply get him deported.. you need to report the fraud to USCIS along with evidence.. make an infopass appointment.. they will investigate and decide.. See Darnell's post at http://www.visajourney.com/forums/topic/504611-reporting-marriage-fraud/

[Penguin_ie 5,985]

Sorry this happened to you, but without concrete proof that he comitted fraud (email where he admits it, him having another wife etc), his greencard will remain.

Best you can do is divorce and move on.

[Boiler 43,429]

Sounds like an arranged marriage. I do not know how it works in India, can you get your money back?

[kzielu 1,147]

I would ask for a refund as well - since - technically you don't have the husband.

[Naumanxenon 38]

I hope you guys are just being naive, but there is no such thing as a "refund". The dowry is a gift given to the family and it is almost never returned.

[Boiler 43,429]

So there are circumstances when it can be returned, seems to be OP's main issue and presumably she would not be asking if it was impossible.

[kzielu 1,147]

I hope you guys are just being naive, but there is no such thing as a "refund". The dowry is a gift given to the family and it is almost never returned.

Why not just sue him ? After all it is US...

[Jawaree 717]

Sounds like an arranged marriage. I do not know how it works in India, can you get your money back?

I don't think the funds can or would be returned, move on its

nothing U can do to make him leave the USA, just hope he

naturalizes as soon as he can & financially U R off the hook

[bronco37 16]

............... and giving his family a huge amount of money in dowry he started showing his true colors. He started harassing me mentally as soon as he got his 10 year greencard.

I googled. Per Indian laws, paying Dowry is illegal as well as accepting Dowry. Looks like it is one of the customs of British days when Brits made a law in India that prevented women to own any property and so, parents of the daughters were giving their daughters her share of money in form of "dowry'. Also, for both Brits and indians the customs of dowry for kings and queens were there for ages.

Anyhow..

I am all done with him now. But I just want that guy to be back in India from where he came from.

If you are all done with him, don't bother about sending him back to where he came from. It's an exercise in futility. It will take an act of congress to get him deported. If I were you, given your story, I'd more worried if this douchebag will stay mostly in India and maintain his GC here. In a few years time, he will retain a lawyer on contingent payment and sue you for I-864 support. This area is now most immigration lawyer's wet dream. As a USC you will be lucky if you even find a lawyer to defend you. In most cases, your defense will be weak as there is no incentive for legal community to find a suitable defense against abuse of I864 provisions.

If you really want to pursue this, every USC involved w/ immigrant community should write to the congress about I864 provisions as they serve neither the Govt. or the immigrant but, fattens the wallets of immigration lawyers in most cases. Who in the right mind believes that an immigrant can support himself/herself w/ 125% poverty line in a country where he/she has no other support structure available?

tl;dr - worry more about I864 abuse than deporting the scammer.

[CowBoE 429]

Gosh, I can totally sympathize with your madness.

But you want to restore your happiness as quickly as possible,

but I think pursuing deportation of this elusive guy as a revenge

would just drag your anger deeper and further along.

Also keep in mind that since you signed the affidavit of support,

you could be on the hook for providing financial assistance to him

even if you divorce him.

I think you should focus, instead, on how to get yourself off the hook

for any future financial support for this undeserving man

and of course don't tell him anything about affidavit of support responsibility.

Hopefully, he has enough guilt to not put you through more financial burden.

I would start by documenting and capturing your communication attempts with him and his family,

and may be even make recording is possible, to build up the case so that you can get

favorable ruling in divorce and get you off the financial hook.

Now during that process, if things work out in a way that exposes him to be in fraud marriage,

then let that be side bonus but not your main focus.

There are other good man out there for you...hang in there.

Best wishes...

[JKLM 1]

Hello friends,

I am in an awkward situation right now. Here is the thing.

My age is 25. I am an Indian originally. I moved to US in 2009. And got settled over here.

I went to India in 2012 and over there I was married to an Indian guy.

At first it was all good as I just thought that he is the right person for me. I was not able to stay with him much as I had to come back to USA for my job. We kept in touch over the phone and emails.

Soon thereafter I filed his application for a US visa and after successfully getting a US Visa he came to United States around April this year.

I spent quite a lot of money behind him and also financially supported him from here. When he came to USA I still kept supporting him and thought we both would be a happy couple.

We both were living at my workplace where the lodging was provided by my employer.

After supporting him for 2 or more years and applying for his visa and paying all the visa fees and plane tickets and giving his family a huge amount of money in dowry he started showing his true colors. He started harassing me mentally as soon as he got his 10 year greencard.

He then started making excuses and started having quarells with me without any proper reason. He then left me after 1 month of us being together.

I tried contacting him again and again but he never responded to my calls. Over there in India my parents and my relatives tried to contact his family but they also didn't responded very well.

I do certainly feel that I was used by him in order to get a valid US Visa and a Greencard and as soon as he got what he wanted, he left me alone.

I recently went back to India in order to convince his parents and I begged them that please do call your son and let him know that I have been expecting him.

Right now I have already spent more than 3 months awaiting for his proper reply but he doesn't wants to reply to me nor his family members want to give me a valid reason for him leaving me just days after he came to United States.

From what I have experienced based on his attitude and his family members behavior towards me, I do believe that this marriage was done just for the US Visa benefits that he would be getting after being my husband.

I am all done with him now. But I just want that guy to be back in India from where he came from.

I thought posting it over here will get me some help and some guidance on what should I do next.

Thanks.

Hi,

Sorry to interfere in u'r personal life. You said, your husband used you to get a US visa & a Green Card, I've few questions;

1. Are you a US Citizen or a Permanent Resident? I see that you've only moved to US in Aug 2009 and how did you get your GC or Citizenship?

2. How did he get a 10 year Green card? Did you sponsor for his Green Card or Did he get it through his employment? It seems like you married him only in 2012, if he is getting 10 years Green Card, it could only be through you (provided you are a citizen, filed for his initial GC in 2012 & removal of conditions by early this year) or if can get it only through his Employment, ideally through EB1 filing (which is not a marriage fraud, where you don't have any control over it & there is nothing illegal here)

3. I see your VJ status as F2-A visa filed, so I would like to know, how would you claim that you have sponsored his Green Card?

Kindly explain so that other VJ members can provide you better suggestions and help.

Thanks!

[Fan_Dancer 171]

Since he has the 10 year card, there is nothing you can do, divorce him and move on.

[subwayguy 100]

After 26 years , I came to realise that the golden rule is : men cannot be trusted .

Why wasting time on that SOB while the ultimate goal is to move on . And how do you move on ? Eat a whole jar of ice cream, then find another man, fall in mad crazy love and live a better life.

[doshi8000 19]

do women pay dowry to marry men in India?????